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people looking down on you for your illness


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the unfortunate thing about people approaching a doctor with their schizophrenia or psychosis is the fact that they look down on you .  i swear , every time i go to a doctor and i try to explain that i'm being watched or that bombs will fall they all give me this stupid look , like down their nose .  

why are people so afraid of this mental illness?  why do people look down on me so much whenever i admit my ilness?  people don't look at me the same once they know i'm schizophrenic , they look down on me and honestly i wish i could be honest with what is going on with me without fearing like they will look down on me all the time.

 

sorry about the rant - i really needed to get this off my chest

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I find the same thing, especially when talking to doctors other than pdocs or tdocs. Like if they ask what medication I take because they need to know interactions and I say an antipsychotic they suddenly talk to me differently and look down on me like I'm some sort of scum or stupid.

My old pdoc used to give me word looks when I described hallucinations like she couldn't believe it and thought I was stupid for having them.

It makes me very wary of talking to anyone about anything now.

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I know what you mean.  I don't know what the deal is with people assuming that "schizophrenic"/"psychotic" and "stupid"/"hopelessly insane" mean the same thing. 

 

I don't think you need to apologize for ranting, it's good for the soul(or something like that).  Rant away if it helps you feel better! 

Edited by Schizophrenic_Sanity
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I remember telling my GP about my delusions (while psychotic, but I had insight) and he said "Why are you afraid of the sun? It's just the sun." And I just felt so invalidated. I remember thinking, "I KNOW it's just the sun, I WISH I knew why I am afraid of it." Doctors, don't ask stupid questions.  :brooding:

 

I agree that doctors/nurses can be very awkward and punitive when you mention psychosis. Well, when you mention basically ANY mental illness, let's not kid ourselves. 

 

Explaining your psychosis is awkward already, without getting disbelieving, or downright hurtful treatment. 

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I am bipolar but take 3 antipsychotics. The last time I was at the mdoc he asked if I was taking anything new.; I said Prolixin. His response was that he only had one other patient that took it.  He already had the bipolar in my history because when I moved to town he filled all of my scripts until I was able to get into see a pdoc. He didnt respond any differently.

 

I have had 2 hospitalizations for chest pains and had to give my meds and other diagnosis several times and was always treated normally.

 

Maybe it is the label of schizophrenia that they find concerning.

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For the longest time and sometimes I still do this, I would admit to having bipolar but not to having schizoaffective bipolar. I have never met a person who has known what schizoaffective really is. I got tired of having to try and explain it to everyone (not that I told many at all!). And I hate having this illness so much! If I had diabetes or something like my brother it would be a non-issue. Most people have a general sense of what diabetes is and that it is a very valid medical condition. People would rush to help a diabetic having a low blood sugar episode. But a suicidal psychotic person rambling to themselves on the streets? People run the other way, hide their children's eyes/cover their ears, ignore, etc. Both situations are life threatening, but they are responded to much differently. There is so much stigma it makes me sick.

 

I could go on forever but I wont. I just really get where you are coming from.

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i'm really glad so many other people understand .  thank you everyone .  i just talked to my mom today and told her i have schizophrenia (recently diagnosed and it's kind of been obvious for a while) - her response was 'you're not schizophrenic - you don't act insane and crazy like one' .  just disheartening , but it warms my heart to know others understand :)

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My old pdoc was pretty good at being supportive and not making me feel crazy when I explained hallucinations and such to him. I don't know about my current one. I think he doubts my diagnosis, and got all weird when I explained stuff to him. We'll see how he responds when I update him on recent things like hearing voices (whispers at this point) amongst other things. The one thing that my old pdoc said that really made me feel weird/bad, was that I should "just tell people I'm bipolar" rather than schizoaffective. Now mind you, I don't go around telling people anything like that, but I'm going to be open and honest with the people in my life that know what's going on. How is telling me to not say what I actually have combating stigma?

 

I told my close friends about the schizoaffective and my best friend's boyfriend was relating to me at the time because his cousin is going through some stuff related to bipolar disorder, but when he found out I had something a little different, his tone totally changed.

 

I had no clue that schizoaffective disorder existed before I was diagnosed with it, and people seem to kinda zone out if I end up talking about it (rare).

 

I get where y'all are coming from, that's for sure...

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i'm really glad so many other people understand .  thank you everyone .  i just talked to my mom today and told her i have schizophrenia (recently diagnosed and it's kind of been obvious for a while) - her response was 'you're not schizophrenic - you don't act insane and crazy like one' .  just disheartening , but it warms my heart to know others understand :)

 

I'm sorry your mom invalidated your diagnosis like that. Hopefully she meant well, or was in denial, but her reaction stems from stigma and ignorance/lack of education about the illness. Not that that makes it any easier to hear. Ugh :(

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That's funny, I do the same thing. I tell ppl I'm bipolar and leave out the SZA part. In fact, I'm trying to think of a way to tell my mom about the SZA part of my diagnosis. So far she only thinks I'm bipolar and disagrees. She said "I think you were misdiagnosed." Probably because I've had so much practice at maintaining my composure so well around people. I can only imagine what she'd say about the SZA part.

I usually freak out in my mind, though I can keep the appearance of calm and collected. It's very awesome because I don't make a fool out of myself often; I just have to dismiss myself after being in public for too long, and limit my social exposure. Though it also makes it impossible to convince other people when I'm having problems and need to excuse myself from things on a regular basis. It would also feel Fantastic to actually express myself in mania/hypo-mania, though I would definitely get into trouble. I remember watching Stephen Fry's documentary when he said people with bipolar disorder are better at controlling their emotion's appearance due to all the practice, a very true statement.

Though what's weird, is when I keep the SZA part of the DX a secret, I feel like I'm lying or something. When in reality, it really doesn't matter.

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I can relate too.  Idk why DRs in particular seem to be "scared" of MI when I first tell them.  Some clearly walk on eggshells around me too, at least at first, until I "prove" to them I'm just another person.  I may have MI problems but they don't treat me without walking on eggshells until after a few appts with them. 

 

I do have one DR though, who from the start treated me as a person.  It was such a relief to have someone not judge me on day 1.

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