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I am wondering if others of you are like this. I am embarrassed and ashamed to admit it but I wish I didn't have to have a shower or brush my teeth, wash my hair, the whole bit. I actually get nervous if I know I'm going somewhere (because for sure I'll have to do all of these, I wouldn't leave the house otherwise). Is it caused by depression, because I don't really hear of it. Oh and its gotten worse since I've had major surgery and it hurts to move. If you are like me what do you do???

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When I get like this it's usually a sign that I need to increase my antidepressant. I'd say these feelings happen to a lot of us that experience depression. I had a spell of this last week and told my pdoc about it on Monday. He increased my amitriptyline.

 

Sometimes it takes every bit of willpower I've got to just move. Whether it be from the bed or the sofa or a chair. It's so much easier to sit where I am and do nothing. Showering and brushing my teeth take more energy than I've got. Once I do actually move then I don't want to move again. It's a terrible feeling but from my past experience it'll clear up in about a week after the med change.

 

I hope you start feeling better soon. If you need to talk to your pdoc about a med change, do so. If you can't get an appointment then maybe a phone call will work. You don't have to suffer. 

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Oh, you are definitely not alone!   You'll find lots of people here in the same place as you are!  In fact, we've had entire long threads re: the last time we've showered; the last time we've brushed our teeth, etc.

 

sylvan covered some points on meds and talking to your doctor so I'll cover some other things; they may or may not be helpful.

 

If I absolutely cannot face the shower I will do sort of a "sponge bath" and hit the main areas, if you know what I mean, with a washcloth.   That works pretty well.  In fact, if you've had major surgery, maybe you actually had to do that when you first got home.   For my face, I use those facial wipes with a gentle cleanser built in (I know they can be pricey, I use neutrogena & wait until they are on sale). 

 

Do you have to wash your hair every time you go out?  As I get older (you are probably far younger than me) my hair gets much less oily; it actually tends to be dry, so I can get away with not washing it longer.  

 

Sometimes I get it a little wet and put some gel in it. That works.    Do you have a "go-to" hairstyle, like pulling it back or even wearing a hat if need be?

 

Good luck; everyone seems to go through this.  Tell yourself you'll be in and out in five minutes.  

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Last summer, starting in July, I started showering once every 3 weeks or so during a dysphoric mania. I have yet to wash more than once a week, usually. I can think of one time I took the extra shower.

 

I am better about my teeth and gums than the rest of me, for some reason

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I am meticulous about brushing my teeth (I can't afford to go to the dentist often), but showering is a big problem. I shower when I have to (i.e., when I know I HAVE to leave the house), but there are times when I just stay home when I have plans because I can't face getting in the shower. Usually, if I can make it to the shower, I can make it out of the house, but the shower is a BIG hurdle. I've cried some mornings because of the shower, and sometimes I stand there thinking, "I can't DO this,"for a long time before I get in. I sometimes use those wet disposable washcloths instead, and sometimes leave the house without a shower if it's a week where I have to be somewhere every day because it's so much effort - that usually makes me feel more disgusting and depressed though, so I use that as incentive to shower.

 

However, it's been really tough on me going back to school. The toughest part isn't studying or adjusting to classed after so much time away - the toughest part is getting in the shower every morning and showing up! I managed perfect attendance this semester, which was a milestone (I previously had a horrible absentee rate at every school and job I'd ever had). I did skip showers, though, and on one week, I skipped for two days in a row, which again was a record because previously, I'd shower only once or twice a week, if that. 

 

As I get older, I seem to get smellier faster, which sucks. Either that or I never really noticed or cared as much when I was younger. It's a double-edged sword, though - it forces me to shower more often, but that is really hard for me.

 

For some reason, I LOVE showering at the gym after a workout, though. It's easier when I'm all sweaty and I'm right there in the locker room.Showering in my own shower is tough.

 

I have a pdoc appointment this morning, and I greatly resent the fact that I have to shower before leaving. I didn't shower yesterday, and felt so much safer. For some reason, not showering makes me feel safer.  

 

I can relate to the people saying they went weeks without showers - I used to shower once every two or three weeks when I was suicidal. 

Edited by bookgirl
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I totally understand! I don't like to shower or brush my teeth and I skip both of those things more than I'd like to admit.

 

I didn't brush or floss last night and I have not showered yet today and I probably wont have time because I have to be somewhere in 50 mins. I know I could take a quick shower (especially since I went to the gym) but I don't have the motivation. Thanks negative symptoms! I am not depressed so I know it's not because of depression right now. So I will feel stinky this afternoon and try to shower again when I get back home. I NEED to. My scalp gets itchy if I don't shower. And I feel like I stink and look gross!

So here's to trying to shower today! I'm going shopping with my dad to get a good anniversary gift for my mom tonight. I really want to shower before we go out. Ugh.

 

I'm kind of mad at myself for not showering yet. I do this all the time! grrrrrrr to me!

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I'm with you all.  It's getting worse.  I have to leave myself LOTS of time and do it in steps, now, because the entire process of brushing out my hair, showering, and getting dressed is too exhausting for me to handle all at once.  It would help if I brushed my hair daily so it stayed less tangled.  So now when I have to shower, I brush out hair, sometimes stopping to sit down and cry in the middle of it.  Then I do something else, like make myself some breakfast or coffee.  After that I shower and wash hair.  Then watch TV or listen to music or something.  Then get dressed and go.  Once upon a time, I could run through the shower and eat and be out the door in 45 minutes.  Now it takes 3 hours and I dread it every time.  Like bookgirl, I have canceled plans because the whole preparation prospect was too overwhelming.

 

I have lots of hats.  They are all for concealment, not for fashion. 

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I have a pdoc appt tomorrow but am too depreseeded to shower before I go. I have never skipped showering before I SEE him. It has been a week now.

 

I am telling myself that I would not be the first time he has experienced a dirty patient before.

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Agreed that you are not the first dirty patient your pdoc has seen. Last summer, I saw a covering pdoc after not having showered for *3 weeks,* which is a bit over the top. But when I thought about showering for the appt., I decided, fuck it, let her see how sick I truly am. I was wearing a hat to cover my hair, but it was pulled down to reduce eye contact.

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I am EXACTLY like this.  Half of the time my reason for not going out is less my agoraphobia than my lack of energy to shower, get dressed, do makeup and hair, brush teeth, blah blah blah.  I've gone as long as a week and a half without doing any of that and it's the worst feeling.  I'm normally very fastidious about hygiene and appearance so it just makes the depression worse.  Now that I'm in partial hospitalization I HAVE to get up every morning and do the routine, because I can't stand to go out grimy.  It's actually a nice thing for me to be forced into taking care of myself.  Now that I'm on new meds (include one to help me sleep better) I'm hoping to keep the trend up. 

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Yeah, this is one of my biggest challenges. Showering and general hygiene make me anxious as all get out. When I'm not doing well and I have to go somewhere, I use cleansing cloths on face and body, and baby powder on my hair. Plus a lot of deoderent and sometimes perfume. It's not ideal, but it works well enough for those tough times.

 

I also agree with fantod, if you have some time on your hands taking breaks in between hygiene things can help a lot. I'm so anxious about going out that the 3 hour shower is my main go-to. It really calms the anxiety to let myself take my own sweet time.

 

Finally, I found that colorful, good-smelling and funny shaped soaps can sometimes help. My personal issues with bathing come from childhood abuse so this may not work for everyone but a friend (who doesn't know about the abuse) suggested that in terms of hygiene it makes sense to cater to the child-like / sensory part of yourself.

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