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Today has been nothing short of hell. My mother and I took my dog to the vet and we had him put down. 

 

11 years ago, my mom bought me my favorite breed of dog, a golden retriever who I named Scamp(from Lady and the Tramp). I remember when I used to put my giant sombrero on his head and he would leave it on and tolerate it. I remember taking him for walks under the stars at 5:45am before I would go to school. I'll never forget the time he ate my basket hanging on my bedroom door hah. I would give anything to see that again. I'll never forget how he always got up and greeted me at the door or the times he let me cry on him. I grew up with my dog scamp. He was always there through the fun times and hell times. Now I have no dog to feed, no dog to walk, no dog to love. 

 

Now, the image of him being put down haunts me. After he was injected, he lifted his head one more time and I said "It's ok, You're taking a trip. I love you buddy." Seeing him take his last walk reminded me of death row. The vet then put ink on his paw and gave me a pawprint on a card. Then she gave me some of his hair. 

 

I feel like my heart has been stabbed and then ripped out of me. I am trying to stay out of the hospital at this point. I may end up there. 

 

I never got over the death of my horse 3 years ago. I will probably never get over this death. Why does life exist if the future will only consist of major pain? Someone please tell me what the point of anything is...

 

dVuyseB.jpg

 

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He was beautiful. I'm very sorry to hear that you had to put him down. Losing a furry friend is so, so hard. Take care of yourself.

 

Edited to add: the point of life, for me, is all of the things I do have. I know that when I am in a tough spot, though, it's hard to see these things.

Edited by Dusk
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Having to make the decision that you made for your dog  is extremely hard, but somehow you knew it was the right time; you didn't want him to suffer.   So you put his comfort above your needs.  That's a generous act of love and kindness. 

 

It's difficult to think about it this way right now;  it is too painful - but our dogs   (and the other animals we love) look to us humans to take care of them throughout their lives, up to the end...  please know you did the right thing.   Sometimes I think... why do we have animals and grow to love them,  when we know  from the beginning that we're sure to outlive them?  

 

I think because the time we do spend with them is precious and good.      I hope the future does not include only pain for you; I don't think it will.  

 

I know something of what you feel; we had to put down our beloved Springer Spaniel when she was nearly sixteen years old; she had been in our family from the time our daughter was in kindergarten through her college graduation.  After a little while, I made a photo album about her, and finally now (after about five years) we can all look at it and remember the good times. 

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Our non-human animal friends are really not that different than our human animal friends.

They share intimate daily life with us. We depend on each other and love each other.

 

I love Scamp's "Seuss" feet in the photo you posted.

 

I am so deeply sorry for your loss.

 

It is clear you loved Scamp and that makes his loss that much deeper to feel. And, by all sounds of it, he had a very good life with you. I'm glad you were there for him today when he needed you.

 

I don't think we ever "get over" the loss of our loved ones. I think that in time we feel the loss less acutely.

 

Near as I can tell, life exists to share time with other creatures and love each other. And it sucks that it is inevitable that when we love other creatures, almost always one of us will leave before the other. That's just a fact.

 

And it doesn't make it easier to live.

 

<3

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I'm very sorry, CynicalReality.  Scamp sounds like he was a great friend. 

 

You could check around to see if there is a pet loss grief support group in your area.  I attended one after my cat Speedy had to be euthanized and it helped. 

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I'm so sorry for your loss. He was part of your family and you loved him.

I lost my dog Sassy a while ago and it is still hard sometimes.

It's not fair. I too know the last look that Sassy gave me. It is haunting me in m memories all the time. He looked over the vet's shoulder and it just looked like, "where are you going and why are you leaving me behind?"

Omg I am bawling right now. I'm so sad for both of us.

I hope you feel better soon. Though I know it will take some time. Take care.

Edited by Wonderful.Cheese
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I'm sorry to hear this, CR.  There is something extra-special about a childhood pet.  You never forget the pet that grew with you and was there for you through all the ups and downs of your life.  Your buddy lived a good life, and I am glad that he was so loved, cherished, and well cared for.  Sending you wishes for some comfort right now.

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You can see from my avatar how I feel about dogs. I am so sorry you had to put Scamp to sleep, but you couldn't let him suffer so it was the right thing to do.

 

I think our animals come into our lives to offer us their love and loyalty, and they teach us how wonderful it is to have that kind of devotion.  You are a better person for having known Scamp, because he taught you what it is to love someone whole-heartedly and with no qualifications.  He will always be in your heart and your memory.

 

I'm very sorry that he had to go.  Please accept my sincere condolences.

 

olga

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Miss Reality, I have to say that I do very much understand what you are going through. My dog passed away on Monday. She was only 11 1/2 years old, however she was a Great Dane and that specific large breed's life span average at 7 years. It has been so incredibly difficult, and I imagine it has been the same for you. Losing a pet is (not like, is) losing a family member. And that is never easy.

 

The thing is though, I knew it was her time. She was very old, blind, deaf & had Lou Gehrig's Disease. She did not seem like she was in pain most of the time but I can not imagine what she was going through on a daily basis. She had to be atleast tired, and I know how even just being deathly tired is hell.

 

For me, I have been having good days and bad days. Sometimes I can go without thinking about it too badly, especially when I am busy. However other times I break down and have to let it out.

 

I do miss her, and I still love her. And I always will. But it was for the best, and I do hope you realize that about your lovely golden. We had our times together, and they enjoyed it just as much as we did. They were loved & appreciated, and taken care off (okay spoiled) to where they were happy. And they died knowing that we loved them. 

 

My best condolences.

 

Sincerely,

Danielle

Edited by Gibson
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I'm so sorry to you CR, and you Gibson, too. It's an awful, awful thing to lose an animal companion and I hope that there will come a point where you can both escape the sadness to look back and cherish all the moments you had with your deceased friends.  :( Wishing you well.

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Sorry about your loss Gibson and Vanderk. :( I know, it's not easy. At least the pets are no longer in pain. Indeed losing a pet is losing a family member and a best friend.I hope you both feel better soon. 

 

Thanks for the support, everyone. It means so much to me, really it does. I am glad you all care and understand. That does make me feel a lot better. 

 

For now, I just pretend that my dog is in the house sleeping in another room. It is working pretty well. 

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