So it has been a while since I have posted on the forum, but I wanted to hear from others on this topic. What does identity instability look like for people with borderline personality disorder? I want to get feedback from people who actually deal with this problem. The reason is that I believe I deal with this problem (feeling like I don't know who I am, confusion about gender/sexuality, not knowing what I truly believe in, feeling like I lose myself in others, changing goals/career ideas, etc.) This is a longstanding issue.
I was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 disorder initially, and this was changed to Schizoaffective disorder: bipolar type. My original psychiatrist denied the possibility of BPD, but I feel like that is a more accurate dx than the other two. (In all honesty, I heard from other medical staff later on that this PDoc basically dx'd everyone as bipolar!) Also, I was diagnosed only after a reaction to a medication (which was possible due to the newly published DSM V), and I feel that the majority of "psychotic" symptoms that I experienced (that led to the dx change) were caused by the many other med cocktails I was given over the years. I'm very sensitive to medications, and have tried many to no success.
I've read about real life experiences from people with all these disorders, and none of them have spoken so truly to me as borderline has. I started crying the other day because it made so much damn sense. I am not looking for a diagnoses from anyone. I just want to hear from others...I am going through a very bad stretch, and I just want to feel like I am not alone.
I want to avoid posts indicating that everyone goes through identity crisis. I know that. But this is something that has been with me for a looong time. So, to anyone who is willing to share a bit of their story with me: Thank you in advance. I really need to know I am not alone in this right now.
Hello, I just joined, so I apologize if this has been talked about before... it took me a decent while to find a forum online I felt comfortable being a part of. I must admit, the swear words in your writing made me feel right at home haha Anywho, the idea of having this forum accessible from an easy to use application would be amazing! That way, when we are on the go, it may be easier to flow through the app and respond to others. Just a thought. And of course, I’m a bit manic today, so I just had to let you know
Recently a new girl has started work, and I've taken a liking to her.
The trouble with this is that I've walled myself off from other people for around 7 years. I've been managing to deal with my illness by not talking to other people, not having friends, not having a partner.
I wasn't looking for anything with this new girl, but unfortunately, my body has had other ideas. I've been hit by a wave of emotions for her that I'm just not able to deal with. What makes it worse is that she's been seeing a guy for 14 years and there's no chance that we will ever get together. I think that she was attracted to me when we first started talking; I don't think that she would want to go out with me still, but life isn't black and white. I was flattered that she was like this, but I didn't push the issue, I knew how things were.
On the mood scale chart that I keep seeing everywhere, I'm normally between 5-8. Since this has all started. Since her turning me down, I'm now between 2-5 most of the time, I think I've dipped down to 1 twice in the last couple of months.
With my mood being all over the place, it is becoming more difficult to talk to her and I think she's pushing me away now; I can see things from her perspective and I can't blame her.
Recently, she's been smiling at someone else in the office that isn't me and I'm having difficulty with it. It all feels so stupid, but I've now let someone have too much power over me and it is keeping my mood low.
I don't know how to get out of this. I'm worried that if it continues I will need to take time off work and if that happens I might lose my job, my house, etc.
I need help!
Does anyone have any suggestions for how I can move on more quickly?
Has anyone dealt with similar issues?
By X Anime Lover X
Ok let’s get started, so I have a crush on a boy in my year.
I like him a lot but I can’t find any ways to get close to him. He is normally surrounded by people and I get embarrassed. I also get sad when I haven’t said anything to them at least once a day. Even a small ‘hi’ helps.
The only time they are alone is when they are walking home. I could walk home and walk with him but there’s these problems:
1) My dad picks us up since he is a stay at home dad. By us I mean me and my brother.
2) The way he walks is different to how I would, so I would have to figure out a way but I’m willing too.
I’m going to try and walk home with him. I’ll use my phone as a map then once we have walked close enough I can say I’ve accidentally went the wrong way. Since it will be random how I’m suddenly walking with him I’ll make sure to say a reason why.
Thank you and does anyone have any advice?