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Lonely spell panic attacks


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If you live alone and suffer from lonely spells how do you deal with this? If you ever have lonely or alone panic attacks how do you deal with these? I'm interested in how others deal with this. I typically divert myself and if it works great and if not take a prn medication prescribed for panic.

 

Do you ever call someone? Not to talk about your panic but just to talk? I'm not big on having others as caretakers (not knocking those who do) but if you do have peole who you call when having what I call a 'lonely spell panic attack' do you tell them you are having one? or just talk about whatever? For me, just talking about whatever helps greatly and I have never felt the need to tell I'm having a panic attack.

 

Do you feel living alone is bad for your mental health/mental illness symptoms if you live alone and have MI ?

 

I've lived alone too many years now and am too set in my ways to share a large apt. or house and this is a real dilema for me as I would like to have a roomie but know it wouldn't work out.

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Lots and lots of people, even MI people, live alone by choice. You make it sound punitive, practically. I am married, but not until I was 37. By the time I was 25, I stopped having roommates. I like being alone. Sometimes I get irritated that DH is here, because I like it so much. I don't know what to suggest, because for me, being alone has always been a positive, not a negative. But I don't think it makes a mental illness worse, in and of itself.

 

Do you like to read? Video games? crafts? Streaming shows? Crossword puzzles? There's nothing wrong with getting a roommate, but you cannot put the onus of your loneliness on his or her back. I'm sorry if I sound harsh, but it sounds like you think getting a roommate will cure your loneliness, and that ain't necessarily so. All s/he owes you is rent.

 

I have lived alone many times. The main issue is having someone around to tell you when your mood is swinging. But you don't really need someone living with you, if you get crazy enough, it will be obvious. Do you have a friend who could clue you in when things are starting to get weird? I have several friends that tell me if they think I am becoming batshit.

 

And when I have a panic attack (which are usually about 10 minutes?), I lie down, and breathe, because there is nothing to be done at that point except to tough it out. The good thing is I recognize a panic attack, and don't think I am dying, so it doesn't seem as horrifying.

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How coincidental that this subject appeared.  I just asked my Tdoc last week "How can I be lonely, yet want to be left alone?"  Her response was that many people feel this way & that you have to balance the time you spend with people to the time you want/need to be alone...or something like that.  I live alone and I don't have many friends.  I have acquaintances (people I keep in touch with on social media, would say hello to if I saw them in a store), but only 1 person that I feel close enough to to just call or text & say, 'Hey, what's up, wanna spend a few hours together?'  Sadly, her life has changed so much that I know the answer & it takes days of planning, last minute backing out and practically astrological alignment for us to get together.

 

I've previously had a room mate, and while there were issues (changing the light bulbs to blue hued 'daylight bulbs' & changing the shower head to a low flow version, both without discussing it with me).  I considered us friends and let those things go (but changed them when she moved out).

 

I liked having a room mate in that it gave me someone else to be accountable to in regards to house keeping.  I don't have anyone over to my house enough to keep me motivated; so knowing that someone else needed to use the same bathroom or kitchen made me much more motivated to keep it clean.

 

I did find myself thinking about myself in a negative manner when she was here because she would come and go, doing this & that, going here & there; and I would be on the couch in the same spot.

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I love living alone and like being alone.  Having roommates (or even just 1 roommate) would make my life hell.  If I have panic attacks I have medication to help calm me down, and when I do have them I'd actually rather be alone to have them.  I just don't like being around people much, especially in my home.

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I've never lived alone, but I have been doing a lot of thinking about whether or not I want to live alone in the next couple years.  Having roommates has mostly been beneficial for me, and the social interaction with them has helped with my mood in the past.  However, I have had enough roommate drama to last a lifetime. 

 

I think it is a very individual thing.  I know people who happily live with five to eight other roommates, which is something I could never handle.  Personally, I could see myself becoming a total hermit and falling into a depression if I lived alone and didn't have regular contact with friends, co-workers, and support people.

 

If I were feeling lonely or having a "lonely spell panic attack," I would call somebody to talk.  You don't need to mention you are having a hard time.  You could call and simply say that you had been thinking about the person and wanted to check in with them.  It's okay, too, to ask for companionship, friendship, and attention when you need it. 

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Hi Brian,

This is a great topic for discussion!

I get what you're saying...I get those 'lonely spell panic attacks' too, even though I have a husband. He works nights and has for the last 3 years or so, so I do spend alot of time alone. If I'm feeling particularly lonely, I tend to be more prone to panic attacks...

I call my mom or my brother if I need support...and if I'm 'too far gone', I take an extra .25 xanax...

 

I think though, only *you* would know if you're better living alone or with a roommate. I'm considering getting a roommate if my H moves out during our divorce, but I'm just considering it....I don't know that I"m cut out for a roommate, unless they understand MI and can deal with me wanting my space.

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Do you feel living alone is bad for your mental health/mental illness symptoms if you live alone and have MI ?

 

I've lived alone too many years now and am too set in my ways to share a large apt. or house and this is a real dilema for me as I would like to have a roomie but know it wouldn't work out.

 

Definitely.  For me right now at this ripe oldish age, living alone woud be a disaster.  When I was in my 30's it was perfect.  Definitely depends on who you are and where you are in your lifetime.  How do you know it won't work out?   Having a roommate is difficult but can work.  My best roommates were the ones I was NOT friends with but compatible. They were busy and had their own completely full life.

 

When I was living alone and had panic attacks, there were no meds for me to take. I would call one particular friend.  She is someone I respect, admire and knows me very well.  She won't coddle me but can tell if I am desperate and need soothing. She knows all about crazy meds and crazy people.  Other times I would call anyone just to talk and like you, maybe not mention the panic attack unless I was comfortable and safe enough with that friend.

 

I read in a book recently something like 'loneliness is a spasm away from solitude'.   Maybe at this point in your life it might be time to seek out a roommate or perhaps a regular activity that involves other people.

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I had one roommate one time for two years in my early thirties and it was great.  A large 1200 sq ft two bed two bath apt. with laundry in apt, dishwasher and a patio.  It was rather expensive even with two splitting all but I was better with anxiety.  He found a better job 200 miles away with major medical and went for it.  I went back to a small one bedroom.

 

The Odd Couple comes to mind 'Can two divorced men share an apartment without driving each other crazy?'  Only I'm not divorced.

 

My concern is my age as I'm too damn set in my ways and too dominant of MY space and in my forties.  I think I could have a roommate if he was also just as bullheaded and nuts as me.  It would have to be the right guy, a large apt. or single family home and we would have to have enough in common to get along and enough different to get along.

 

The expense of moving is great and finding the right guy would be tough but I'm officially looking.  Also today, where I live it's much, much less expensive to split a two bed, two bath apt. than two having their own one bedroom as the rents for ones are only slightly lower than most twos. 

 

I can just see my ad on craiglist now 'wacked out mentally ill male looking for roommate the same, friendly for sure but crazy as hell'.

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