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Just making an introduction post and looking around etc.

Little hesitant to post my name, not because I'm important or interesting but because I have a fairly uncommon and googleable one, so I'll just introduce myself as Winter. Hi.

I'm in my early 20's and schizoaffective (schizo/bipolar) with treatment resistant PTSD. I'm currently actually in a mixed state!!! Wow it's so great, I'm pacing and just want to smash stuff 24/7, where's the elevated mood at again?


I'm an abuse/neglect and rape survivor. My first psych hospitalization was at 12. They started off with a diagnosis of psychotic depression, threw a bunch of drugs at me for about 10 years, sent me off to ~residential treatment~ / bootcamp twice, tried every other diagnosis that could possibly stick and now I'm here. I've given up on psychotherapy but see my psychiatrist monthly. I'm also looking into getting a psychiatric service dog because my anxiety, depression, and occasionally dissociation or psychotic symptoms are at the point where they're completely restricting my (lack of) life and I'd like to get a handle on that, thanks!! Other avenues have pretty much all already been tried.


I have no job. I don't go to school. I don't have friends.

I play video games most of the time or stare at the wall or do pushups. Sometimes I try to combine all three. I'm loads of fun really.

Thanks for allowing me to post an introduction, look forward to getting to know some people on here who I can relate to.

Edited by winter is pale
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Winter, I think it's wise to remain anonymous.  I also have an unusual name, and I would just as soon not be googled by everyone on Crazyboards!


Welcome to our happy asylum.  I ask all new members to read the rules---it avoids misunderstandings later on.


I hope you like it here and meet some new people.  This is a good crowd.  Crazy, but good.



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Yeah I understand wanting to be anonymous too. Anxiety is my main issue so it's no wonder that I worry that something I post here will be revealed in my real life and ruin it indefinetly. Yet all I want to do is tell EVERYONE EVERYTHING and it's so hard.


Have you tried doing something outside to break the pattern of daily life? I am a big fan of the outdoors - but like you I sit on the couch and stare at it from the window more often than I go out in it. I know when I go outside, just for a walk, even to the end of the driveway or the street and back, I feel better. It's getting out the door that is the hardest for me.

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Thank you for the welcomes!


 I know when I go outside, just for a walk, even to the end of the driveway or the street and back, I feel better. It's getting out the door that is the hardest for me.


yeah definitely! that helps me too, but just like you the hard part is forcing myself outside. I'm fortunate enough to have a house with a good sized back yard with a bench and such, maybe I should try parking myself out there more often. thank you :)

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It may sounds kind of funny, but if you like video games and find yourself playing them for hours, try putting a shade up outside or one of those mosquito tents and set up out there and play. make a comfortable space that you won't have to move from, get some drinks and some food in a cooler and just play the games out there on a nice day. I like to read outside too. I just find the fresh air and the tiny amount of physical activity it takes to get up and walk into the yard sometimes mkes me feel better. Most of the time if I'm feeling crummy I get in my car and go to Walmart. I know it's cheesy and there's lots of other places I could go, and I don't even need to buy anything, I just buy a couple of random things and be around people for 5 minutes and then I've had enough and I go home, and home feels so much better after that LOL

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