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This Sounds Pretty Pathetic, But...


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Every time after my boyfriend and I have sex, I want to cry or do cry. This happens for no particular reason. I hide it from him. I have no had any particularly traumatic sexual experiences and my boyfriend is very caring and giving in bed. I don't know if it is to do with my MI or something else...does anyone else have this problem? Or an explanation?

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Sex is a very intense physical and mental experience and sometimes the intensity, for me, comes out in the form of tears.  It is also a huge release and sometimes that release is happiness, sometimes sadness.  I would talk with your boyfriend about this and explain what is going on.  You might find that sharing it with him is cathartic in itself.

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I agree with PR.

 

There's nothing inherently "wrong with you" if sex brings tears. Provided you are having safe, sane, and consensual sex.

 

If it's triggering unpleasantness, or your are having sex out of obligation instead of desire, I could understand that you would have distressing tears.

 

However, many people find that the intensity of sex and the accompanying release is simply that... an intense release. And when humans have intensely releasing experiences, sometimes we cry.

 

And, as Rosie Greer says, "It's alright to cry."

Edited by Wooster
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Every time after my boyfriend and I have sex, I want to cry or do cry. This happens for no particular reason. I hide it from him. I have no had any particularly traumatic sexual experiences and my boyfriend is very caring and giving in bed. I don't know if it is to do with my MI or something else...does anyone else have this problem? Or an explanation?

 

This happened to my last ex once where she really did start crying horribly right after. We talked it out and in her case she said she couldn't really explain it, but eventually explained that she thought it might have been related to her being really self-conscious about sex sometimes, to the point where it was upsetting. This could be a very different thing though. She had some issues with emotions, and specifically had some problems recognizing and explaining her own emotions though so that also could have been related. Maybe things were getting sort of pent up because she had trouble relating them, and then they exploded.

 

I would say one way or the other it's an indicator that you have a lot of emotion wrapped up in the experience, but that's all the pop psychology I can do : /

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Thanks guys...as usual you all give the best advice/explanations. I will try to explore more into my emotional self and see if that is the root of the issue because that would make sense as well as the energetic release kind of thing.

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When I was young, I didn't cry after sex with some men, but when I fell in love, it was a much more emotional experience.  I don't know how old you are, but hormones and the intensity of orgasm can combine to really make you feel weepy and emotional after sex.  I wouldn't worry about it too much---it's pretty common. 

 

I have also seen men cry after sex when it was a very emotional situation. :)

 

olga

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I've seen a guy cry after sex.  However, in this case, it was because one of my dogs jumped up on the bed when we were done and landed on his balls.  :lol: :lol: :lol:   

 

Anyway, now that I've made every person with testicles wince and cross their legs:  I've cried after sex, and it doesn't really have anything to do with being sad, although weirdly enough the crying can sometimes trigger feelings of being sad.  Usually it's very brief and disappears nearly as quickly as it started.  It makes me feel a lot better when I share it with my partner, and like olga sort-of alluded to, it's only happened when I've felt very emotionally safe with the person.

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