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I hope this belongs on CB and on this sub forum!

 

 

I want to talk about a particular delusion of mine which is central to me when psychotic and that I don't really shake it off.

 

The second time I remember being psychotic I was like a scared kid asking my mother and father about a god... oh, the embarrassment. I was full blow psychotic then.

 

So, without going into detail, while psychotic I will, more or less, see a god everywhere and find at the most odd places, from I am god (don't know if I go manic) but I feel powerful yes and intelligent more, all the way to my cat was god, or a friend, or god mas music, or communicated with us through music.

 

I have my next psychiatrist appointment in September and if it by then I do not manage to shake it off my head so that it is not obtrusive of my life I will tell the physician about it. Any ideas on how to bring this up?

 

Any other thoughts on this? 

 

If you have religious comments on this and would prefer to send it to me through a private message, I'll be happy to read your ideas on this, even if I do not reply or end up engaging in a discussion.

 

Cheers!

 

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The following is a summary of me:

 

Come from a catholic family, have done all rituals (first communion, confirmation), went to a Jesuit University. Currently live in NYC with my parents... had to come back home a few months ago : (

 

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Lm

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Write down some notes for yourself as to which topics you want to discuss. Or, if you are uncomfortable starting the conversation, you can hand the list to the pdoc, and say those are the topics that are of concern to you. I actually bring notes to all my appts., and read them off as the appt. progresses.

 

But really, you can just say, "Hey, can we talk about x? I'm worried about it." Religiosity is very common among those who are episodic or psychotic.

 

To be frank, if it is an intake appt., you shouldn't be afraid to tell the pdoc in much more detail than you feel comfortable doing here. S/he has heard it before. A pdoc's job is to treat crazy people, they aren't going to be surprised that you sometimes act crazy.

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Ah, my first thought has already been taken up...

I'd also suggest taking some time to get this down on paper, probably as rough notes for each episode that you can gradually tidy up and organise.

(Not one polished essay in one sitting.)

 

That could be useful time-saver for your psychiatrist (keep a copy),

To save worries about producing it in good verbal order at the appointment,

and also for you as something to develop thoughts and awareness from.

 

My other thought is that if you do not have these religious feelings and experiences when away from psychosis, you may want to try to set up a thought of these phenomena to be seen as a "flag", warning you of a possible state/mood change.

Not dead easy I know, as I have a different condition with something I could use as a warning symptom, if I can actually remember that when it actually happens, rather than just "going with it.".

 

Regards, Chris.

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When I went psychotic in 05. I thought I was God, and I thought other ppl where God or angels. Because I was in jail and the gaurds had deep voices I thought maybe they where God. I was psychotic for sure. Was hearing whispers and loud commanding voices that I thought where God. Finally after about seven months of this torcher. I started to come to my senses and it kicked started my faith in a very big way. I won't preach since you asked not to. But yes I would suggest a new med or up it for sure.....I have been in that state and it's not fun......See if you can get a app earlier then september cuz thats pretty far away. You don't have to live with the delusion that you have super human strength even tho I know the rush of feeling that and it's fun....But then come the scary parts and you will just get sicker and sicker. Better yet. Go Into IP. for real because you are there if you know what I mean.

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