Using Sex To Escape numbness and emptiness

[aprilmayrocks]

I was reading an article about borderline and came across this:

 

 

Hypersexuality in the Borderline is an intricate issue. On one hand, she uses it to escape her numbness and emptiness.  

http://gettinbetter.com/dance.html

 

 

This is exactly what I do! I use sex to help feel the empty void I feel. Does anyone else do this? I am not sure if this is the most healthiest way to cope with my emotions but it works. 

 

 

 

[Brokendishes]

When I'm in a certain cycle of my MI, I do that--act out sexually. But the shame and anxiety of it was too much so I switched to compulsive spending...Not a great fix, but it helped lessen my anxiety--I guess overspending is the lesser of two evils for me...

I still use heavy flirting and seduction to fill my need for admiration though... Hopefully can get through this with more therapy...

[aprilmayrocks]

Thanks for your reply. 

I impulsively shop and spend money I don't need to  but it doesen't feel the void like the sex does. 

[isthisit?]

Yes I used to as when I was 18-21, up to 3 times a day, it got me in some pretty dangerous situations and I mostly regret it, the whole process of making myself

look nice, meeting men, having them find me attractive, someone to have a conversation with, and the sex to make me feel less alone and alien, I also used to

think that we had all these connections that weren't really there and it drove me crazy when I got no return phone call ( about 40% of the time).

 

I would advocate talking to a professional or anyone before doing this, I may have changed but my reputation in the town I grew up in never will.

[Amysosad]

I do too!!! but its not your normal sex, more like me being told what to do really the fact of being helpless during sex gets me off way more and also when i feel like my mind dosent want to stop thinking bout random crap, i watch some porn and get off like 4 times before i stop thinking about worries,is it bad that i like watching porn more than having real sex ,Ive done alot of random stuff since i was in highschool and after, been also in situations where i couldnt get out of ,but i keep telling myself you will be fine. Hope i can open up more and learn about my condition and read if anyone else is like me..

[Emettman]

"I use sex to help feel the empty void I feel. Does anyone else do this?"

 

I don't think it's that rare.

I have been there on occasion, a male going the "escort" route to company, though it's the holding hugging and caressing which does far more than bare sex act without that.

I don't need sex a quarter as much as I need affectionate cuddles.

I'm not even physically well enough even for that, currently.

 

 

"Seeking only workman's wages, I come looking for a job, but I get no offers...

Just a come-on from the whores on Seventh Avenue 

I do declare, there were times when I was so lonesome I took some comfort there..."

Simon and Garfunkel "The Boxer"

Chris.