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Life after delusion of grandeur


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I went into psychosis over the summer and was having delusions of grandeur where I thought I saved the world, that was going to be be a rockstar and all that good stuff until I got sent to the hospital in july and came back to reality. I feel like I dropped from the sky and hit the ground on an emotional level and now find it hard being happy with my average life and an average life in general, I feel so insignificant now after everything I thought was happening in my mind has anyone else gone through that if so does it get better in a few more months or so?

Any words of advice and encouragement will be much appreciated

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I can relate; I'm sorry you are going through this.  For me when I get back to reality it can be really scary at first until I get involved with life more.  When this happens I tend to watch the news more, read magazines, etc, to get caught up with current things going on in the world to develop some sort of connection to things.

 

I think it would be helpful to see your pdoc (psychiatrist) (if you have one), and if not then I'd find one.  Meds can be really helpful too, and there are so many out there and so many combos to choose from that really work well.

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it takes a while for life to make sense again after coming down from psychosis.

you have just had a profound ,life changing experience.

ok,it's sickness,but your soul is trying to tell you something.

start with the small things,make coffee in the morning,do what you can handle.

slowly,life will return to "normal".

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This has happened to me twice. The delusions were different but I can relate. I thought I was a vampire and would not eat food only bottled water with a drop of milk. I had so many delusions I try not to remember them anymore. My last stay in the hospital was for ninety days and I was released in march 2012. Keep yourself doing things as much as possible. After having what seems to be wonderful delusions and being thrown back into reality is very challenging and depressing. I felt like I had to retrain by brain. But what helped me was getting a house and living on my own. I spent a lot of time with family because my friends didn't understand what happened to me. I spent a lot of time outside. We would go to the lake and fish. The more I was doing things the less I was thinking about what happened. It took some time I felt sort of better in a couple of months but by October of 2012 I was able to start working again and that really helped the most. You might feel better much faster than me. It was really hard for me to bounce back after a second time.

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Time helps.

 

I still miss euphoria but really don't miss the bad to which the state ultimately lead.

 

In addition to time, I worked with a good therapist. She specialized in folks with bipolar. She didn't judge. She was really good at helping me sort out my episodes and gain a more balanced view. There was good, but there also were a lot of negative consequences. Grandiosity tends to make me arrogant which tends to leave people irritated or angry with me.

 

You may be dealing with some depression and adjusting to meds right now, so there may be a little more going on than just a reintroduction to normalcy. Time helps with those.

 

Focus on getting your shit together in the world of consensus reality. Then, you can make plans to do whatever you want. Then, make it happen. Actual success is exciting and real exciting things can still happen in your life. It will just take more effort.

Edited by AnneMarie
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 I feel like I dropped from the sky and hit the ground on an emotional level

 

That's a good description of what actually happens. For sure, after the supersaturated Technicolor world of hypo/mania, real life looks like it's been filmed in Black & White, and that's kind of a bummer.

 

I second Annemarie, for right now, just work on getting your head together. Once you're feeling comfortable again, then you can start looking forward. Keeping a mood chart helps, because then you can look at it and see your progress. Other than that, just give yourself permission to be in neutral for a while. You've been flying high, and you may have landed, but you still gotta taxi to the airport. Let that be your "job" for now, while you regain your strength and perspective. The world'll still be out there when you're ready.

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That's a really accurate description you gave of how you felt.

I know when I was sky high I was on meds to bring me the hell down as fast as possible, but as they were lowered and I was on a baseline dosage, that feeling went away. Having a tdoc is helpful, and if your pdoc can see you more often, that would be great.

A lot of great suggestions by everyone. Wishing you the best and welcome to CB (if you haven't been welcomed yet!)

 

It does get better.

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Thanks everyone has been very nice and helpful. It feels good to get this stuff out to different people that understand what it's like. I really can't talk to too many of my friends about it because they want understand and I feel embarrassed talking about it to people who never experienced it even though I think delusions are kinda funny in hindsight (anyone else feel the same?) but I'm actually feeling a lot better. I feel like I did before shit hit the fan and I hope it stays that way, I've made up my mind to take up pre-meds in school and become a psychiatrist and I'm feeling pretty good and more clear minded now since I've made that decision where my life ahead looks clear and bright. I've been trying to keep active despite all the time on my hands. I haven't mastered the art of keeping busy but I'm getting better at it.

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think delusions are kinda funny in hindsight (anyone else feel the same?)

 

Usually not for me.  I am usually really embarrassed by all of them, especially when I truly believe them and start talking to people as if they are all real when they really are no where near any kind of truth.

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I can relate, I started missing the people in my head afterwards where I felt so lonely so I started hanging out with friends everyday. I'd hate to see how I would feel if I didn't. I mean I kinda have to look back and humor myself for some of the crazy things I was thinking, not all of them of course but some of them I try not to take too seriously if I can

Edited by YKantLaurenRead
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