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This is going to sound strange I think, but I'm going to ask anyway.


My mom is visiting from 3 states away bc of my mental state right now.  Whenever she visits, we always go for a manicure..one of both of our favorite things to do together.


She knows about the cuts and such on my arms, but wants us to go get a manicure today.  


My question is: How do I get a manicure without looking like a crazy person who cuts up their arms?  Is there some excuse I can give to the manicurist as to why I would have all these marks on my arms? Would you avoid it altogether?  I'm sure if I told my mom I couldn't get one bc of this, she would understand, it's just that it's something that we really enjoy together, just us.  It would be nice to have that time together.


Any suggestions?   Thanks

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I don't have fresh marks anymore but I do have scars.  Often times I just do what I want to do in terms of my daily activities and say nothing.  If people are curious, it's none of their damn business.  If someone directly asks me, I say "I had an accident" and leave it at that.

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My advice would be this, if she knows you have scars buy one of those ankle, wrist support elasto bandages the ones that are just a cylinder of strechy fabric, wear it and tell your mother the truth and if anyone else asks say you burnt yourself under the hood of your car or something. if it is required on both arms im not entirely sure sorry,

Edited by memo
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My mom knows..that's why she's visiting.  I self injured in high school and have given into that 'force' (that's what it feels like) a few months ago that I've been fighting ever since.


 My concern was more with the person giving the manicure (yes it's both arms, my foot, calves...ugh).  I worry I'll get all anxious if I have to come up with something on the spot, so I need a story before I go.  Luckily at the place we go they don't speak much English so hopefully not too much questioning, but they are nosy so the question will arise.  Am I just being paranoid?

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I get a pedicure once a year.  At my last one, the nail technician asked, "What happened?!" and commented on my scars.  I was so embarrassed that I haven't gone back since.  I regret letting one comment keep me from a fun self-care activity I do with my mom.  Don't be like me!

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This is where heavy duty concealer comes in! If it's covered most people won't notice, and if they do they'll definitely know not to ask! You want either stick concealer and apply it generously or you want tattoo concealer and apply this sparingly...always get a shade lighter than you would normally get and blended out it won't show! 


If you are low on cash ask Sephora for a sample to try...they almost always give you a sample to try in a little cup and it's an easy way to get a good amount.  


Any cheap stick concealer if you're looking for a one time thing will work just fine and blend it out! 


A close friend used to cut she's recovered and doing so much better now, but for the year we were really close I went on mission to lighten and make her scars better, Mederma was fine but I found out my acne medication Tazorac was additionally prescribed and used in scar reduction....it's a bit expensive but if you have insurance it will make the scars flatter in lighter by increasing cell renewal! I recommend Tazorac all the time because it works, if it is too strong or you can't find it other retinoids will do the job just as well such as Retin-A...but Tazorac is the STRONGEST retinoid available by prescription only! Anyhow good luck and I apologize for rambling.





I thought you were talking about old scars that were healed reading over it I see you have never designated whether you are talking about healed scars or 'fresh' scars...Wooster is right applying concealer DIRECTLY to an OPEN new scar is not sanitary nor advised. If you do not or are unsure if you are completely healed take a look at the 4 stages of healing and consider what best fits you (http://www.curad.com/firstaid/stages.asp) If you are insistent on needing to hide them don't fret, you can still temporarily safely do so.


NOTE: If you have: severe lacerations, incisions, punctures, or a festering wounds of any type, covering them is the least of your concerns at the moment...and you should proceed and procure prompt medical attention as they can easily become infected or require sutures to properly heal.


Firstly, sterilize said wounds(s):  Rubbing Alcohol, Benzethonium Chloride, Chlorhexidine, Cadexomer iodine, Ethacridine Lactate, Polyhexanide, or Betadine all potentially can do the job.  Hydrogen Peroxide is no longer advocated but will work as well, it is just not as touted as it once was nor is it optimal.


*If you find this step too strenuous you may simply was the wounds gently with antibacterial soap and hot water, in the shower works as well, pat dry with a sterile paper towel versus a standard shower towel.


What you need is to create a temporary sterile surface to work with that safely provides a medium for a liquid concealer, and this is possible.


Liquid silicone made specifically for scars flattens and protects active active scar, it is advocated for this use a medium for concealing agents as well...proceed to wait until the liquid silicone cover has dried on the scar, and then when it the silicone gels has completely dried, it is now safe to apply liquid concealer on top (opt for liquid concealer in this situation).


Silicone and liquid bandage coverings should be implemented for superficial incisions (incisions, or cuts, are wounds made by sharp cutting instruments such as knives, razors, and broken glass, of all classes of wounds, incisions are the least likely to become infected, since the free flow of blood washes out many of the germs that cause infection)

They (silicone and the listed liquid bandages) will provide the temporary sanitary surface you require to SAFELY cover your scar, and two to three applications usually suffice to create this surface.


The most popular liquid silicone scar treatment include products like: Scarguard SG5 Technology Scar Treatment ("Fast-drying, Brush on, Clear Liquid Waterproof, Nearly Invisible Can be Covered by Makeup")


Walgreens and CVS readily carry this item, and variations of the product are made. The silicone forms the flat sanitary guard, which the brands tout, and reduce the scars level.


It is pricey but if it reassures you and makes you comfortable (and of course you can afford it) then it is worth it. Again this is if it is necessary (the price may be an hindrance costing about $25-$30), however silicone overall is very positive for new scars and helps them look and feel much smoother.


Alternatively for just the temporary surface you require without all the healing properties and scar reduction properties silicone possess look no further than: "liquid" or "spray-on" bandages, they work and effectively create the medium you need, they almost implement one of the following ingredients to create the medium:  8-Hydroxyquinoline, polyvinylpyrrolidone, pyroxylin, nitrocellulose, methylacrylate-isobutene-monoisopropylmaleate , acrylate, or siloxane polymers. (Look at the ingredients of the spray-on or liquid bandage you are using and spot these).


Apply 2 to 3 coats of the liquid  or spray-on bandage (waiting for each coat to completely dry before proceeding with the second and third final coat, and then you can proceed with the liquid concealer.


For concealing scars, you'll need a 'heavy coverage' concealer, this will allow for full coverage of the scar, and require very small amounts of the concealer itself. 


For personal concealer recommendations or ones I personally find efficacious are two picsk:



A cheap one to use (over the dried sanitary surface of course):  Glamoflauge Heavy Duty Concealer (Liquid)  (It runs about 6 dollars at Walmart) or Physicians Formula Conceal Rx Physicians Strength Concealer ( It runs about 11 dollars and you can find this at Walgreens or CVS)


If you have more money to work with: KAT VON D Lock-It Tattoo Concealer (It runs about 25 dollars at Ulta or Sephora) or Make Up For Ever Full Cover Concealer (It runs about 32 dollars at Ulta or Sephora)


Again you light dab the concealer in over the temporary sanitary surface you've created, with the full-coverage concealer a VERY small amount is needed to successfully cover the scars, a couple of gentle dabs, and voila! 

Edited by Forbidden91
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Forbidden, if the cuts are relatively new, concealer is a REALLY REALLY REALLY BAD IDEA.


Unless a cut has COMPLETELY healed (as in formed a scab and the scab has fallen off and not been picked off), putting concealer or ANYTHING THAT IS NOT AN ANTIBIOTIC OINTMENT on it is a really good way to give yourself blood poisoning.


I appreciate that you are trying to be helpful. However, please don't suggest things that could be dangerous.

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I don't cut, but I have odd, obvious scarring from other self-harm and excoriation. I'm the master of non-confrontation, so I often ignore the question, or counter with a different question, like, "what's the weirdest thing that's ever happened to you?" That's rude, but it's rude to ask someone else their business too.

Open sites should be covered. Liquid bandage could work to help keep out foreign agents and contaminants. My experience with it is limited to my fingers and forearms, but it's been helpful for me. Waterproof bandages as an alternative, maybe?

It's okay to enjoy yourself. You haven't done anything shameful.

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