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I'm having a terrible panic attack. I know it'll help me to sleep. I don't want to rely on this anymore. I'm tired of it. I just tried taking a shower to soothe and memories kept coming back and I just kept screaming in the shower. I don't know how to cope with my anxiety. It's like I get time and then something happens and I just don't know how to react. I'm tired of being mentally ill. When does this shit stop? At least I've held back this long this time. Maybe I can make it tonight.

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I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling. I know how crippling anxiety can be and the power it takes to repress those feelings. I overcame anxiety and do not believe it is always outgrown. I can recall having panic attacks as a young teen and how terrible they were however when I started exercising vigorously it's as if the nervous energy was depleted before it could be channeled into anxiety. It's a suggestion that may work for you. I rarely get anxiety anymore although I do allow negative thoughts to come back into my head of usually traumatic experiences but I usually do not try to allow myself to focus on them, and throw myself into a task to get rid of it until my focus can re-directed into something objective. Anxiety does pass, and if it becomes more of a progressing issue you should really bring it up with your doctor because "as needed" or PRN medication is available for panic disorders and other anxiety disorders on that basis so you can resist self-medicating with illicit substances and/or alcohol.


Good luck. :)

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