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I accidentally burnt myself taking food out of the oven yesterday. I didn't think much of it at the time.

But now I have the mark across my arm. And I miss them. And now I want to do it again and again. 

I'd already been fantasizing about doing it, lately, although they weren't very strong and I was coping fine with it. But seeing the mark (however unintentional) is really triggering me. As would covering it up, because I would know what was underneath.

I was doing so well!

 

How do you cope with accidental injuries triggering the hell out of you?

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I treat them as if they were injuries to someone else, in a loving way. I think to myself "If I saw that wound on W. (my nephew), I would want it to be cleaned out very carefully and dabbed with antibiotic and bandaged thoroughly."

 

You know the Golden Rule, Rosie?  That you should do unto others as you would have them do unto you? Think about it a little harder, and you'll realize that in order to fulfill that excellent and basic command, you have to treat yourself kindly, too. I know it's hard, but try to think of yourself from that outside perspective (ahem) and it will remind you that you deserve the same care that you, loving soul that you are, would lavish on a stranger in need.

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I've been there and it really sucks. I've accidentally dropped a cigarette before and had a minor burn from it, and it brings all those urges to the surface regardless of how well I'd been doing suppressing them. I wish I had some coping techniques to share, but I don't, besides taking care of the burn with ointment and a bandage. When I've been in a similar situation, I just try to stay mindful and acknowledge the thoughts/urges and find a way to distract myself from them. But I feel none of that is stuff you don't already know, and I know it's never that easy. I hope you can find a way to move past it.

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Hm.

Admittedly I've been struggling a lot today anyway and am already vulnerable. I spent a good portion of the night up flashbacking and being so confused why I could see the bright lights blinding me when I was pretty sure that I was in my dark bedroom.

I guess I can treat it as a learning experience or something. I just am not sure that I deserve nice things right now.

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You all do deserve nice things. You deserve the best! I mean that from my heart.

You are so helpful around here and you give so much.

I'm sorry you are struggling. You definitely don't deserve that.

Can you call your tdoc for a earlier session or something? or maybe something you love to distract yourself with?

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I'm sorry you're struggling with this, Rosie, and I'm sorry about the flashbacks too. You do deserve nice things, and you deserve to be safe. 

 

This past summer, I accidentally cut myself with a knife at work, while opening a box of product. It brought back some unpleasant memories. 

 

This is definitely a tough situation to be in. My first thought is to cover it up, but as you said, that doesn't really take away the triggery-ness. What normally helps you when you're triggered? I think all those methods would apply in this situation. 

 

I'm sorry I've not got much to offer in the way of ideas. :( But, I really think your go-to methods of handling triggers would be helpful right now. Something to remind you that you deserve love, care and safety. 

 

If I think of more useful things, I'll be sure to post them. 

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Unintentional triggers are hard. I had one time I bought a bad shaving razor and wound up cutting my leg. I felt extremely triggered. And like I had to hide it because of my history. I guess what's important is using things that have worked before for helping you. Like journaling, appointments, posting, whatever works for you. I understand how you feel. What can you do to distract yourself or get through?

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I like what Gearhead said. That's great advice.

It bothers me a lot to have accidental wounds. It makes me want to add to them, or do things to make them "mine." Instead, what I have done in the past is taken a fine point marker or felt tip pen and written things on or around my old scars. I write things like "not worth it," or "it's over," or "took forever to heal" or "remember infection?" I'm allowed to think back to when I did it a lot, and remember how it was to carry those wounds on the outside.

My mind tends to look back on self-harm more fondly than is true. If I think about the times when I was miserable or afraid of what my secret wounds might be doing because my care wasn't enough, that helps me most times.

Edited by Czernobog
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Hope your feeling better, Rosie. I've felt that too, and it's hard. Because part of you really wants the familiar calming sensation. When this happens, I try to accept that I want to SH (acceptance does not equal approval). Then once I admit it, rather than having to fight the fact I am having urges, I can focus on what I'm actually going to do (no more thinking) in that moment (something other than SH).

I also call my tdoc when I am feeling unsure of myself and my ability to not SH.

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Czernobog, that's a good idea. I think it would better for me if my scars were in a place where I could see and reach to write things. You're right that I tend to forget about the risk of infection and being worried about healing time and that sort of thing though. Those are good things to keep in mind. 

 

Teacup, that's a really smart process that you've got. Thanks for sharing it.

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