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Reasons not to SI


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Once more, I am struggling to remember why on earth SI is not a good idea, so I am trying to make a list:


- it leaves scars 

(=> but I deserve them.)

- I want to be a teacher I don't want students to know my history by looking at my arms

- I can't wear short sleeves

- it actually doesn't help

-... it makes stains?


But they seem so... ridiculously small, who cares about stains?



Do you have any "good" reasons not to do it?

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I deserve to be treated with kindness and respect and compassion.


That's my primary.


It finally clicked for me that I would never do to another person what I was doing to myself.

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Thank you Rosie


I... don't know. I have no right to be kind to myself, because I am obviously biased toward myself, so... in case I would be too nice, I must not be nice at all? *realises it doesn't make sense at all and scratches her head*

And... you would deserve compassion and kindness. 


I don't know, it doesn't make sense, it is a gut feeling, like knowing that the reality is more real than books. I just... don't see anything not deserving to be hurt in me. 


I am trying to rationalize this by saying 'if I would not do it to someone else, then I can't do it to myself.' But then... it's just not the same. I 'see' why it is not logical, but I fail at understanding it.

Edited by inabook
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I don't SI because I love myself. 


It took a long time to learn to love myself, but once I realized it, I knew SI wasn't something I wanted to do anymore. 


Like Woo, I realized I would never do to someone else what I was doing to myself. 


Inabook, you deserve kindness and compassion. I know it's hard to wrap your head around that notion at first. But you really do deserve to be treated with kindness, compassion, respect and you deserve safety. I have watched you fight so hard and it's inspiring to see you work so hard at recovering. Keep going, it gets easier with time. Check in with us when you can, we care about your recovery. :) 

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the time that you spend thinking about, doing, and dealing with SI you could spend on a project - something that you really want to do (draw, make a dress, learn something, knit, watch a bunch of movies in a row, tackle your life bucket list, etc etc)

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That's a very interesting thought cipher! I always try to replace SI with the most scary activity (studying precisely what triggers me), which, surprisingly.... never works. I will have to think about it (because if it makes me feel more guilty to do "a project", then... it's pointless), but it is a great idea!


Thank you M@ri. That's very true too.

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