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ugh..back to square one


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I had gone 8 days without cutting...8 days!  that was huge,but today I cut again.  I'm afraid I broke the seal so to speak and won't be able to stop again.

 

How do you keep yourself from that downward spiral? ...stay encouraged and move forward bc I feel like a total failure right now.  I'm afraid I won't be able to stop again.

 

Who else has been there and how do you get through it?

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8 days is remarkable!

 

You still have the fact that you were safe for 8 days. That is in no way diminished or erased by the fact that you weren't able to make a different choice today.

 

Relapse is totally a normal part of behavior change. It's expected whenever you are faced with a stressor that overwhelms your new skills. In fact, annoyingly, it's a good opportunity to see where you need more support to succeed.

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I have been there, and it sucks. When I was quitting cutting, I relapsed quite a few times. I hope right now you can have some compassion for yourself. You aren't a failure. Like Woo said, it's normal to relapse when changing a behavior. It takes time to build new skills, and sometimes our new skills get overwhelmed. 

 

Maybe use this time to think about your new coping skills and where they could use some reinforcements. I know when I was quitting cutting, one of the ways I tried to cope was by breathing. Well, that didn't always work. It was fine for the times I would have used cutting to calm down. But the times I felt out of control? I needed something more than just breathing. So, I started exercising. I would do crazy big jumping jacks, then sit ups, then back to jumping jacks, then dance around my room to really loud music. That got all the pent up frustration and energy out of me. So, what I learned was that I needed to identify WHY I wanted to cut, and then do something else that would satisfy that need. Does that makes sense? I feel like I'm babbling!

 

Anyway, I just want you to know, I've been there and it feels crappy, I know. But try use this time to think about where you can bolster your supports. :)

 

ETA: 8 days is wonderful! Good job! 

Edited by Parapluie
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