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Already sick of my meds

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Ugh. I'm still in my IOP and I like it, I'll probably be graduating by the beginning of next month, I've been in the program since September 11th of this year. I'm already angry at and sick of my meds. I can't even really put my finger on why. I just hate it all. I have mentioned it in group, so my own clinicians probably know by now. I'm just sick of my meds, that's why I stopped them in 2012 and was off them over a year. I'm feeling worse lately. I was feeling better. I was out from work on medical leave, now I'm back at work and my anxiety is worse and I'm sad a lot again. I kinda want to drink right now but my whisky was all drank by other people at a shitty Halloween party. I'm broke because I'm still behind on money and bills because I'm still waiting on the state to approve my disability insurance, two months later. I'm so sad and agitated. I did the dishes and that was a big accomplishment, I suppose. I'm stuck in my apartment feeling like shit otherwise, though. I'm trying to use my coping skills but I'm at that point where I'm too restless to focus on them at all. I want to read but it's impossible, I can't do anything more than stare at the page. I don't know where this post is going, I'm sorry.

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