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That time of year again...holidays suck, let's just get it out there.


CrankyMe
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Started thinking about this today. I fucking hate the holiday season. Even though I stopped going to family events years ago, I still feel guilty for not going which makes me mad - at myself. It's GOOD for me not to go. It's HEALTHIER. But still, the fucking guilt.

 

So, holiday haters, chime in. Misery loves company!

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I couldn't agree more. Goddamn, I hate ~the holidays~. I was supposed to be going away during the Thanksgiving break this year, which would mean avoiding all family gatherings with a perfect excuse, but I'm not sure if that's gonna happen because of financial bullshit. Either way, there's no way in hell I'm going to any family functions this year. I have learned that lesson time and time again. Maybe I'll lie and say I have a new boyfriend and that I'll only come if he can. That would stop all invitations and emotional blackmail guilt trips about going pretty quickly. 

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I hate them too. My kids spend 3 months almost, at home, bored out of their brains, expecting me to provide non stop laughs and entertainment for them, I suddenly have to explain my anxiety to everyone, I'm still expected to show up at family meals etc and while I get along well with my family I don't get along very well with food (IBS) and that combined with my anxiety pretty much guarantee's I'll feel like rubbish that day. Not to mention the whole having to buy presents thing. I'm so bad at picking gifts for people and my little brother doesn't mean to but he ALWAYS outdoes (like last year when I think I bought my parents some expensive chocolates from in the city and he gave them a sat. nav for their new car). Every year I suggest we don't worry about presents for each other because at my age if I want something I'll usually just buy it but no, all that happens is they agree, I show up with nothing and they all have something!

Not to mention the suddenly overcrowded mall where you can't even get a carpark and all you want to get is your groceries for the day or week or whatever so you end up having to park eleventy billion kilometres away and then squeeze your way through, wait for an hour in line because people are suddenly buying up big like armageddon is coming and they're filling their bomb shelters while so called "christmas cheer" aka brain numbing irritating christmas c*%p blasts non stop out of the speakers of every store you dare set foot in.

Bah humbug.

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I dislike the upcoming Holidays b/c I just broke up with Joel and will be depressed being alone for Thanksgiving and Christmas.   Thankfully, I have my parents.

 

I also dislike it b/c my brother committed suicide on Christmas eve years ago.  My parents and I tend to be somber and pretend we're having a good time.

And I can't seem to buy my parents anything they actually like; money gifts are out of the questions of course.   

Lastly, I now dislike the Holiday b/c my son will not be with us.  He's in the Marines and can't take long enough leave to visit us.   

 

This thread is making me depressed and tearful.

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I'm really sad and angry today and it's because of the holiday season. I hate that it affects me like this. I hate that I still think back over past holidays and how awful they were. I wish those memories would just disappear.

 

I hate this time of year. I always feel broken.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Even if you had no intention or means to attend the family get-together, it sucks to find out about it via Facebook the day of.  "We're here at Youngest Sister's having a great time!".  

 

I think this is the first year they didn't even invite me to come. 

 

I wouldn't have thought I'd care so much about being invited, when I never go any more, and don't have a very good relationship with most of them nowadays.  Apparently, I do still care.  I wish I didn't.  This hurts.

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fantod, I know exactly what you mean. Exactly. I understand, logically, that *I* have taught my family and friends that it is futile to invite me to gatherings, but it still hurts terribly when the invites stop coming. I'm sorry this happened to you.

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I went to thanksgiving at my aunts this year.... Nobody would talk to me... No one! I was invisible to them so I left... I figures that obviously no one knew I was there they wouldn't notice that I left... Four hours after I left I got a phone call asking where I was... I said it took you til now to notice I wasn't there? Obviously there was no reason to stay! I hate the holidays! Because of my mi no one knows what to say or how to treat me... I have bought the gifts for everyone, they will be wrapped and given away.... I could care less if I get a gift... I don't want to go to any celebrations, don't care to be around family or friends... I believe in the significance of the date and I will celebrate that aspect privately.... As to the rest of the season... Well you can probably figure it out

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  • 7 months later...

I HATE every single second of the hoilidays. I spend basically all of them alone now. (My family does not know I have anxiety/depression and I will not be telling them) I have slightly different reasons. My holidays died with my mother, 6 years ago. She made Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, etc. We had spent a lot of time with her sister and my two cousins. The first Thanksgiving after she passed away, I asked her sister when & where we would be having dinner. She told me that my cousin didn't know yet if she had to work that day or not, and that she'd have to see what day she worked. I really felt that I was being given the run around, but I said, umm ok. They ended up not telling me. :closedeyes: You can't go to something if you don't know when or where it is. They have never called me to invite me to Anything. They have not called me in almost 6 yrs now. What makes it so devistating is that we all had got along very well, we were not fighting at all. Someone said for Me to call them and ask to go to these events. I Can't do that, since to me it would feel like I was asking permission to go to my own familys' events. If I was wanted there, I Should have been invited.

 

The only sort of excuse I can think of for them not wanting me there, is that my voice sounds exactly like my mother's and I have her eyes. Maybe it would be too painful for them to be around me because of that. I feel that would be horribly selfish of them.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I think between Thanksgiving and Christmas I am just having one long anniversary reaction...

I'm the one who avoids the family functions though. It's hard to fake happy when you're dissociating and thinking about dying.

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  • 3 months later...

It's an old thread but, it's that time of year again!  The holidays are upon us....  It's time to eat! I used to really enjoy the lights and decorations of Christmas..... not so much now.  I never have enjoyed the gifting part of Christmas.  Always receiving crap you never use and having to buy crap for people who will never use what I give them.   What a waste of money, effort, paper. LOL

 

I do love the food of the holidays.  Blood relatives are down to just a few left and only one of those is close enough but he and his family mooches meals off of everyone year round so .... not hanging around for that..  We'll be headed to the better half's relatives, great people, always make me feel welcome.... the only draw back is I gotta get those fucking presents for them. LOL  Merry Christmas everyone!  The holidays can really suck but, pick just one thing you like about them and it'll make it easier to get through it.  I choose food!  LOL

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Absolutely no choices, this year (or for the past two)  I shall be bunkered up on my own, and largely horizontal.

 

Concessions to Christmas will be a window display and a pick of the best Christmas speciality foods and treats around.

 

All the Christmas films (including "It's a Wonderful Life" and "White Christmas") have been showing on TV already, for the past month.

(Most with a sugar content which means they ought to carry a health warning and be banned for diabetics.)

 

 

Come Christmas I'll almost be ready for "Easter Parade". Just as the eggs hit the shops.

 

 

"You say 'curmudgeon' as though there's something wrong with that..."

 

Chris

 

bah1.jpg

(a selection of Bah! Humbug!  which can be printed out to turn into badges, if desired.

A quotation from The Treasure of the Sierre Madre is accceptable at this point.)

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  Glad to find that it doesn't just mean a narcissistic, social phobe can hate the once a year family pretentogether.  If it wasn't bad enough to have turkey day meaning uncomfortable stomach aches and nerves being around people tomorrow, it was decided much without my input that because someone's mom is working "we" including me would be repeating tomorrow's grand gaffe again on Saturday.

  

  I wish I did enjoy the Holidays as much as my spouse and others.  Seems to only make me worse, I actually smiled after hearing some terrible news about something on tv today.  What the heck?  Whether anyone reads or not it felt good to get it out.  I fng hate Xmas and all the false pretenses it brings out in people.  I find the proverbial "because it's Xmas" is really code for, "if it wasn't Xmas, I would be telling you to f off " 

 

I decided to try something different than booze to get through this year.  Volunteered to help at a Share house.  I know there are people, but I gotta do something that gets me away from the other

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It's an odd one.  In some regions or families "freedom of religion" doesn't extend to (a largely secular and commercial?) observance of Christmas.

You'd better at least look as if you are involved in and enjoying the festival or you're a heretic.

 

Chris.

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I see the stores are creeping ever-closer to the Thanksgiving starting line for Christmas madness.

It seems Thanksgiving evening or even tea-time is now OK.

 

Don't eat too much turkey or you won't be able to rush out and shop.

(Or are people celebrating Thanksgiving with turkey sandwiches in a queue, these days?)

 

 

Chris

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