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So I have a longstanding relationship with SI when it comes to feeling overwhelmed, angry, self-hate, punishment...but recently I've had issues with it while I'm feeling alright...not overwhelmed...content even. This is new for me and for some reason, harder to control...it's almost whimsical. 

Has anyone else been here? This is a facet I don't understand...I shouldnt be merrily daydreaming of this while out for a nice relaxing drive...

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I know what you mean. When I was cutting a lot, I would get the urge all the time. Even when I was feeling fine. I think it has to do with the addictive nature of SI. For me, it was an addiction, and it quickly became almost like a hobby. 

 

Do you have a tdoc? I found that being accountable to someone helped me fight the addictive nature of SI. As well, just having someone there to regularly remind me of alternatives was helpful. 

 

Do you want to think of some alternatives to SI together? We have tons of alternatives pinned at the top of the board. Additionally, we could hash out some ideas here. :) 

 

But to answer your question, yes, I have felt like you do. 

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