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I have schizophrenia. I've been in remission for four years. I've also had it four years too. I can't deal with rejection. I absolutely cannot deal with it. When one person does it I feel the whole wide world is against me. Yesterday my cousin blocked me on Facebook and on instagram. God knows why. And that i deserve to be rejected because of what kind of person i am. I don't deserve happiness. I have very low self -esteem. I really do not feel worthy of any relationship, anyone. :(

Edited by Pearly
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that sucks that you got blocked. i don't think you are unworthy of happiness. if you're still fighting for relationships...if you're feeling rejected...i think that indicates something and maybe there are therapy options to work on building your self esteem...working to see that maybe whatever the reason is s/he blocked you...maybe it's because the problem rests with that person and not with you...to block you without even telling you why or contacting you later to explain...that's pretty bullshit. i also think extrapolating a world that rejects you from one person doing so.... i don't know for certain because i've not found myself in quite that feeling/perceiving position...but is there someone on your care team who can help you with therapy/self esteem building?

 

i find it to be a mixed bag personally. if i get rejected or people fade away...i usually don't pursue. i'm not one to actively push people away that often...but every time i've cracked i essentially disappear for a ...relatively long time... and when i resurface...i let those who have moved on... i just let go. or when people just get worn out...for whatever reason. i think it's hard for some ...defo i know there have been people over the course of my lifetime who've just...being around someone with a chronic mental illness that causes recurrent decompensation and so forth... someone actually had the balls to say to me once that it's just too hard to watch and know that there's no real "resolution"...that it's draining. and you know...i get it. because i find it draining, too.

 

it's hard enough for me to maintain people who want to be around. and i'm besieged with guilt when i'm unable to be ...whatever it is i think they want...be well, be out and about more, be medication compliant. the number of people i'm really tied to...who actively seek me out still...has dwindled a lot, especially over the past ...in the last three years it's taken a nosedive...but it's shrunk considerably and pretty consistently over the last eight or nine. it does, though i think it's really for the best, make it really hard to be ok with the fact that they've finally removed the one constant companion i've had all these years. 

 

you sound like you're invested in not being rejected though...like you are fighting to maintain those social supports. and i think that's prolly a good thing to pursue as working on the self esteem concerns and your perceptions of others based on rejection by one...if you can find better ways to cope with that...skills to navigate those relationship blips or reframe the loss so that you're less devastated by it...that all could help you have healthier relationships overall and maybe stronger ones that sustain whatever challenges you may face that would be less crushing if you had more support.

 

best wishes to you x

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I am sorry that happened to you. A lot of times those things really have nothing to do with us and more to do with the other person and the issues, they themselves, are dealing with.  Is it possible he/she just deleted their Facebook? 

 

Things like that make us question our self worth. I find my counselor and  CB's forums/chat to be very positive for me and my esteem. The rest is up to me :)  :)

 

You did not deserve that without explanation, especially from a relative. You are worthy of love and friendship as much as any of us.

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I never had a family member block me but I dealt with the rejection of this guy I REALLY liked blocking me when I was in psychosis because I kept sending him music videos and messages saying crazy stuff, he ended up moving and I'm probably never going to see him again. But it's your cousin you're talking about you will see each other again and be cool eventually.

Edited by YKantLaurenRead
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Yup, all very good advise above. In essence, what I had to do first and foremost is learn how to love myself. Without that, for me at least, it was very difficult to love other people.

In the past, I wanted people because I wanted to fill a void in my life which only I could fill. This simply did not work

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I hate facebook but I have a presence there any ways. I rarely check in because I am  usually flooded with stupid shit like cat pictures, please, I have blocked a few for that reason but feel it's a good reason, then there are those idiots who post stories that are not true and it gets shared over and over again, or even the stories that are actually true. Come on if I want to read the news I go to cnn.com, I don't want repeats on facebook. And those stupid chain letter crap your asked to pass along. And how to find Jesus, I did not know he was lost?

 

But yes it is terrible to get rejected and even worse from a family member. But at least you know where you stand with them. You know who you can count on and who you can't. Isn't it better to know ahead of time. As for those that block you, hey it's their loss not yours. You know you have friends here. 

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