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How Do You Feel THIS MOMENT in Time?

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Still hypo.  Still AH, but significantly reduced.  Thankful that I’ll be meeting with my pdoc in about an hour to come up with a revised plan.

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in a good mood. or elevated.

ffs can't even trust my moods anymore.

leagues better than being depressed as the choices would be feeling like shit, crap or garbage.

so yeah..yay

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16 minutes ago, argh said:

in a good mood. or elevated.

ffs can't even trust my moods anymore.

leagues better than being depressed as the choices would be feeling like shit, crap or garbage.

so yeah..yay

Yay!

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Posted (edited)

Came up from the throws of another dysphoric mood crash. Polished off an entire bag of popcorn (yum) with 2 glasses of wine (not my idea, my mom said wine would be better than taking Xanax to sleep (!?!) ) But... well, I do feel warm , fuzzy, and better.

Edited by Blahblah

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4 hours ago, Blahblah said:

my mom said wine would be better than taking Xanax to sleep

I seriously doubt this. Alcohol is "dirty" because it affects so many systems in the body while Xanax targets only GABA. If you need proof, alcohol can kill the liver whereas Xanax won't.

My leg hurts. I will request an NSAID pain reliever when I see the doctor. Also, sleepy but don't want to sleep.

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crappy and irritated about it. there were a few situations at work today that made me feel incompetent, even though they were all very minor incidents that i objectively handled reasonably well. OCPD-related narcissism and pride in my ability to perform makes me sensitive to feeling stupid, and it usually triggers thoughts of worthlessness, uselessness, and imposter syndrome. i know it's not rational, but i still feel awful, and i get mad when i feel badly for reasons that don't make logical sense.

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2 hours ago, Unstrung Harp said:

Intense pain. Not completely receptive to logic. Just pain.

Breathe, Harp. Breathe. This too shall pass. 

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2 hours ago, Unstrung Harp said:

Intense pain. Not completely receptive to logic. Just pain.

I'm really sorry you are feeling this pain, Harp. I wish I could do something. I hope you get a good night's sleep and feel better in the morning. 

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6 hours ago, Gearhead said:

Breathe, Harp. Breathe. This too shall pass. 

 

6 hours ago, jt07 said:

I'm really sorry you are feeling this pain, Harp. I wish I could do something. I hope you get a good night's sleep and feel better in the morning. 

Thanks, both of you. I went to bed and slept it off, and am feeling a little more measured this morning. It's been a difficult few months.

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I got 7 hours of sleep last night---which isn't my norm (9-10), but I'll take it as better than the 5-6 that I had been getting.  Maybe the increased lithium helped with it?  That wouldn't have been my first guess, but it's the only evening change I made.

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Awful, 5 hours of sleep even with a full dose of trazodone and being tired as fuck. Bump to 100mg of Lamotrigine related?

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Stable! Had a decent day. I didn't take any ritalin, so this makes me wonder if ritalin is in fact exacerbating my mood issues all of the sudden? I feel much calmer.

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Was starting to feel better enough to clean/organize etc then boom.  Woke up this morning grouchy, unmotivated, and more depressed. 

Yippee!

😐

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unproductive and depressed entire day, but took no ritalin, so at least I'm tired. Will probably just turn in early tonight.

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