Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

IndieVisible

How Do You Feel THIS MOMENT in Time?

Recommended Posts

My leg is aching today. Slept better last night, but I"m still sleepy. Somewhat depressed especially over my situation.

  • Sad 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bored and somewhat disappointed, waiting for husband to return to hotel from 40 mile bike ride. Rainy and yucky.

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Sleepy. Leg seems to be worse today. I hope I didn't do anything to make it worse.

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, jt07 said:

Sleepy. Leg seems to be worse today. I hope I didn't do anything to make it worse.

Go back and have it looked at again. This is too serious to be ignoring. Worrisome. 

Wondering if I’m stumbling into some godawful mood cycle. Sleep has suddenly gone haywire (worse than usual), mood funks coming and going. Ugh. 

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Mornings seem to be very good lately, but I’m often slipping downhill by afternoon. Not always, but at least sometimes. 

I’m hoping to be able to get more housework done today, but yesterday was a complete fail. 

So, pretty anxious. 

Update: took Abby on her walk and as usual I don’t get energized from it. I get totally exhausted and grouchy. 😆 

ugh

Edited by DammitJanet

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@jt07 how's the leg now? i was thinking about you this morning. i hope it's not worse again.

i'm feeling okay mentally and a bit shitty physically. i have cramps and a sore hip. unsure what i could have done to the hip -- i had lower back pain yesterday (not too unusual for me) but this morning i found it had migrated. 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Out of sorts, and kind of toggling between unaccountably angry, and depressive, and wanting there to be quiet even though my son is home from school and wants to watch TV, which suggests mixed to me, but I don't really know what to think anymore.

Edited by Unstrung Harp

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Relatively calm given the circumstances.  Trying to not let them get the better of me.  Handling the fact that I woke up at 430 (after getting 7.5 hours sleep, so it’s not a problem as much as annoyance).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day two of feeling craptastic. Was ok this am, til I took Abby for her walk and the rest of the day has been shit. Headache is severe, neck and shoulders bad pain in muscles, exhausted, and this am developed a few sores on my tongue? 

And now feeling depressed AF and didn’t get a thing done in my apartment. Dishes are already piled high. 

Construction was louder and longer than ever today. 

Id rather just not exist atm. 

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
39 minutes ago, DammitJanet said:

Day two of feeling craptastic. Was ok this am, til I took Abby for her walk and the rest of the day has been shit. Headache is severe, neck and shoulders bad pain in muscles, exhausted, and this am developed a few sores on my tongue? 

And now feeling depressed AF and didn’t get a thing done in my apartment. Dishes are already piled high. 

Construction was louder and longer than ever today. 

Id rather just not exist atm. 

Sorry DJ. Wishing you a better evening. ❤️

  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Wonderful.Cheese said:

Sorry DJ. Wishing you a better evening. ❤️

Thanks cheese. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, echolocation said:

@jt07 how's the leg now? i was thinking about you this morning. i hope it's not worse again.

 

Thanks for thinking of me and for askingl My leg was doing better until today when I had to run a number of errands. I took a few missteps and now my leg is hurting again. I hope it will be back in shape tomorrow. Except for today, I try to stay off it as much as possible.

I'm still in this sleep mode where I am sleepy all the time even despite my stimulant.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Emotional, overwhelmed and tired. Pdoc is changing up my meds and I hope it makes a positive difference.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Something is not right. I think I may know what happened but the story would be too long. Since when does that stop me? 🤣 

fortunately, I see pdoc on Thursday, but I fear yet again, we won’t find a working sleep alternative. Well, one I can tolerate without wt gain. Cause I swear sleep is just one of very few triggers for me. 

Was up almost every hour last night...so tonight it’s an emergency prn Seroquel I guess. 

Have a four hour drive in an hour...with appointment included, 6 hours...and all I can think ism I’m abusing Abby leaving her home. Especially when horrible, loud construction noise is bad all day long. 

The car would get too hot while in the appointment though...🙁

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Depressed, irritated, tired.  Obsessively stalking my ex-husband online -- I know it just upsets me, but I can't seem to stop. I need to get a grip.

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@jt07 nothing like errands to exacerbate an injury! resting it today should help. i'm glad it's on its way to feeling better.

 

  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Had pdoc appt today, which is always fun (I'm currently searching for another doc).........I'm dressed very casually, with a old top and faded blue jeans, no makeup, no jewelry.....this is how I usually dress.

Pdoc makes a big deal of how nice I look, and I just respond with "Huh"?.......She repeats how nice I look, and asks me "You don't see it"?........I replied no, not really.

I tell her that I'm still very depressed, can't leave my house alone, and about all the OCD behaviors I still do.

Then she talks about how intelligent I am, and what a good job I did raising my kids, so I shouldn't feel so negative......I don't make any comments after that, because she acts like she doesn't really hear what I'm saying.

Then she gives me refills for all my same meds, and I leave.......I don't know what to make of this appointment....

Yes, I REALLY need a new doc, and I'm on some waiting lists, and constantly searching.......**SIGH**

Edited by CrazyRedhead
  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

bad, sad, anxious. my boss has been in a bad mood today for reasons unrelated to me, but the energy he's putting out is making me feel afraid. also i have to email our accountant, who doesn't seem to like me very much. i feel small and frightened of the world.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Leg is aching a little but not hurting acutely.  Still suffering from wanting/having to sleep all the time and my stimulant is powerless against it. I can nod off at any time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Gaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

sigh.

  • Sad 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Similar Content

    • By Angeni Mai
      Lately I've been finding myself believing that there are kangaroos and camels in the backyard but later recognize them as deer. It makes no sense because neither kangaroo nor camel are native to my country. 

      Additionally, I've been having issues with thinking I'm speaking with people and then when I ask them what we were just talking about, they either say we haven't talked about anything for a while or that we were talking about something completely unrelated to what I thought the conversation was. 

      Any ideas of what the Hell might be going on here? I've never had something like this happen persistently up until a few months ago but now it's really becoming a concern. I start seeing a new psychiatrist on the 15th of March, and will bring all of this up, but I kind of wonder if anyone can give me a glimmer of insight of what might be happening here. 
    • By sscott
      Some of my voices tell me their names, and they refer to each other by those names. But the names they use are those of people I have known. I think they intentionally do this as part of an ongoing attempt to induce me to make mistakes and incorrectly think they are humans. But why would an hallucination(s) have motives?
      Furthermore, they actually acknowledge that they do have motives. Often, their stated motive is to cause me to have what they call “a hang-over”, which is a term they use that describes the problems that occur in the real world after misattributing their identity. For example, if I am psychotic or stressed, or if I am reality checking for some reason, I might react to who they ‘say’ they are by posting something incriminating, embarrassing or defamatory on Facebook. But having motives is not the only surprising and inexplicable trait my voices have. They also plan things, they have meetings, and one of them runs a training school in which I am the subject that the students (other voices) use to practice cruelty towards.
      But what really does me in, is an implied association between my voices and my feelings, and I do not mean the feelings I get as a result of hearing certain things, and I do not mean emotions. I mean things like twitching, very increased heart rate, ‘hot flushes’, cramps etc. My voices repeatedly ask “did you feel that?”, as though they are checking whether something they have done has worked. I also occasionally have absolutely terrible feelings that I struggle to be able to describe, and my voices will start ‘saying’ that the shit feelings I am having are a punishment for something that I have recently done.
      But to suggest that my feelings are somehow causally related to my voices is to suggest that my voices have agency, which is absurd. So I am really keen to hear from other people if they suspect that their voices impact their feelings (not moods or emotions) in a determinate, causal way. By this I mean that the voices do something that causes or changes feelings, that is, do your voices ever actually perpetrate changes in your feelings?
    • By Unstrung Harp
      I have changed the name of my blog. My apologies about any potential copyright infringement committed upon other CB bloggers with turtle-themed blogs. The shared turtleness is mere coincidence. I was thinking about this:

      turtles all the way down

      This summer's lesson from the trenches: intense feelings will not kill you (provided you are properly medicated. Please ask your doctor about what he or she can do for you). They will not kill you. You may wish they would. You may feel like they might. But they will not actually kill you. They may drive you to distraction, bring tears and anxiety, make you feel like you are going crazy. And in many ways they are preferable to the alternative. Feeling is part of the human condition. It's good to have a lesson in that now and again. It is good to know that after 27 years as an adult, and many years of therapy, I have internalized a healthy message, which is: feelings will not kill you. Not even intense ones, or ones that feel wrong, or ones that are out of sync with other feelings. That is both comforting and frustrating, but, strangely for me, more comforting than anything else at the moment, even though I feel sort of terrible at the moment. Sometimes you're just going to go through some shit. And maybe going through some shit can be a reminder that you are alive, and have agency in the world, and choices. Good lessons.

      I am capable of learning.

      And it's nice to know that after all of these years together, pdoc/tdoc and I still have things to talk about.

      Yesterday I walked two miles, fueled by a combination of sleep deprivation, adderall, anger, worry and anxiety. But I walked two miles. Forward progression.
×
×
  • Create New...