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Anyone on the schizophrenia spectrum want to share?


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I haven't been able to take my medicine for 2 days. I missed my apt with pdoc on Monday and ran out of meds. I keep calling him but he's not returning my calls. It sleeted today so everything was closed. That;s another day without meds. I hope I get them tomorrow. I'm still thinking okay but the lines are getting a little blurry. I hope he gives me refills tomorrow. I need them. I'm trying my best to hold onto reality but its slipping up a bit. We'll see...

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Voices are telling me to cut very deeply on my arm where magnets for others thoughts may be hidden. The fleshy part of my arm too.

Cheese, please don't do that. The voices are wrong. Can you try to go to sleep or do something else? Can you talk to someone?

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I haven't been able to take my medicine for 2 days. I missed my apt with pdoc on Monday and ran out of meds. I keep calling him but he's not returning my calls. It sleeted today so everything was closed. That;s another day without meds. I hope I get them tomorrow. I'm still thinking okay but the lines are getting a little blurry. I hope he gives me refills tomorrow. I need them. I'm trying my best to hold onto reality but its slipping up a bit. We'll see...

 

I would continue to keep calling your pdoc, like every 1/2 hour if needed.  Sounds like a PITA but when you need meds and haven't taken them in a couple of days, you need your meds.  Idk what meds you are on, but being off of some meds more than a couple of days can cause seizures.  If you are on lamictal you might have to re-titrate back up if off of it for 3 or more days.

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I feel really stupid, I just called pdoc office and asked receptionist if pdoc takes notes during session. She said yes. Now I feel paranoid and like an idiot. Today is not my day I can already feel it. I better get that refund check in the mail today from weight loss clinic. Or I WILL LOSE IT! I am going beyond broke.

 

 

Edited for grammatical errors...once again...STUPID!

Edited by Butterflykisses
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I haven't been able to take my medicine for 2 days. I missed my apt with pdoc on Monday and ran out of meds. I keep calling him but he's not returning my calls. It sleeted today so everything was closed. That;s another day without meds. I hope I get them tomorrow. I'm still thinking okay but the lines are getting a little blurry. I hope he gives me refills tomorrow. I need them. I'm trying my best to hold onto reality but its slipping up a bit. We'll see...

 

I would continue to keep calling your pdoc, like every 1/2 hour if needed.  Sounds like a PITA but when you need meds and haven't taken them in a couple of days, you need your meds.  Idk what meds you are on, but being off of some meds more than a couple of days can cause seizures.  If you are on lamictal you might have to re-titrate back up if off of it for 3 or more days.

 

I called him today. He won't be in until 1. So I'll call back at like 1:30. I really hope he signs the papers. They told me he denied a refill request because I didn't have an apt to see him so I set up an apt. I'm on Zyprexa so I should be fine. 

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Thanks butterfly. 

 

On another note, I got a mouth sore from the lamictal. I stopped this drug last year because it was evil and out to get me. I started it again thinking it was safe because it was just a delusion. But this happens. Meaning it is out to get me. And yesterday the spying delusion turned out to not be a delusion. All my "delusions" are true. I think people can read my mind again. 

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Thanks butterfly. 

 

On another note, I got a mouth sore from the lamictal. I stopped this drug last year because it was evil and out to get me. I started it again thinking it was safe because it was just a delusion. But this happens. Meaning it is out to get me. And yesterday the spying delusion turned out to not be a delusion. All my "delusions" are true. I think people can read my mind again. 

That's the worst thing about havig a delusion. They seem so true. I'm sitting here trying to trust in God. Trying to think the devil is just a delusion but its getting hard. I haven't been on my medicine for 3 days. My thinking isn't as clear. I'm starting to feel unsafe. Ugh I hate this feeling but it's my fault. I decided to not go to the pdoc on monday knowing I didn't have any medicine left. I know how hard it is to get my doctor to approve a refill request. But I did it and now I have to suffer. 

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I've started taking my meds again, I don't want to because I'm pretty certain they're fake and are really mind control drugs but I'm worried about what will happen if they find out that I stopped - the Australian government has had a microchip put into my brain so that mind control experiments can be done on me and the meds are just another part of the experiment.

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