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Am I experiencing psychosis again or panic attack

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i don't want to sound like a broken record

and no i dont have an anti drug message for you per se

but i did read a post of yours that suggested you hadn't

been psychotic before smoking grass

and maybe even said read thread that your first psychotic break 

was brought about elicited solicited by smoking


and i think that's something to really keep in mind that it's had that history

no mystery for you there

plus...there are people who stop doing whatever whatnot and go on to have lives that don't require 

medication forever get better in some ways

and then there are those who don't or who maybe that tipped a balance that was already

along a precipice


i have no idea what your deal is in that respect

and my time machine is out of order

but i'm horribly envious of those who can opt out of this hell of schizophrenia in my life 

and if i could i would for fucking sure and i didn't even get the good times

so if it's in any way possible that it's linked to your psychotic break in the past

that should prolly give you a tip on how to proceed present future

and for fuck's sake please know that regardless this is one happy fun ball you don't want to taunt

and however bad it is for you now it can get worse so avoid the void i say


take care x

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