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When you feel yourself slipping away...?


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I was just wondering, at what point do you feel yourself slipping away from the real world? It usually happens to me when I'm exhausted. It also happens a lot in the winter when It's dark outside and I'm used to it being light at that time of the night.

And what does it feel like?

I feel disconnected, like I'm in a dream. I feel like I'm surrounded by clouds. I talk to myself in my head. I'll do something and then be like, wait, when did I start moving? I chew on the inside of my mouth. And It's really weird but I start feeling like I'm actually autistic and autism is causing me to feel and act like this.

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only more recently in the longer scope since have i known at all

i guess i have always known something was happening

more commentary increased chatter things starting mounting looming against

or my thoughts start breaking apart all suddenly stolen dropping out

but i used to attribute that exclusively to devices and interference and transmissions

and i still will say my jury is out

i can also see the slowing of stagnation of the numb in that and my inability to care about my inability to locate or invest

my problem with seeing it is that it doesn't seem to be making it not happen anymore

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I start to feel like I'm slipping away when I stop to think about things. At any given moment I'm under anxiety and paranoia, but I've trained myself to live with it and not pay it much mind. When I stop to think about it, its origins, how long it will last and so on, I start to get scared which makes kind of manic.

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I was just wondering, at what point do you feel yourself slipping away from the real world?

 

When I become withdrawn, depressed, become delusional ... start thinking things that really aren't true (but at the time I believe them).  I don't want to do anything, talk to anyone, go out anywhere.  And just sit in a chair staring.

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Being exhausted is definitely a trigger for me, also stress.

 

As for what it feels like?  That's kind of complicated and hard to describe.  It's like a haze/fog sets in my mind and I'm suddenly walking through mud and can't sort my thoughts properly.  I start talking to what appears to be myself more often, just lots of stuff.  I start feeling like nothing's quite real, like it is but it isn't.  Good question.

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  • 3 weeks later...

ALL of the above here.

OMG I am actually feeling a little tearful that there are other people out there who feel/experience this. Until tonight reading this thread- I never knew anyone else could think, feel, experience this.

I can actually relate/partially relate to what each of you have written

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I start to feel paranoid, my speech starts to get disorganized. I skip words in my sentences or I stop midsentence and can't finish it. I am on that borderline right now, where I have been tired and starting to feel a little off. I also talk to people and then I can only pay attention for a few seconds and fade out. So I have no idea what they said and how to answer their question. You can only say, "Wait, what?" so many times before people get annoyed.

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When I'm starting to slip I say that my brain feels like fingerpaint. Weird, I know, but it feels like someone is smearing it around, slowly. I feel all disconnected, the chatter in my head gets really loud, I start seeing things, and it just gets bad. The fingerpaint idea feels like I'm in an alternative reality where I'm just watching all of this happen. I don't always notice until my head is really loud and I need to up my haldol until it settles down, usually two or three days. At least my current pdoc has given me a plan for when that happens, my last one didn't but I guess I didn't know the chatter in my head was something wrong, I thought it was normal. Or something!

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but I have to keep asking or I can't really have any sort of conversation.

I know. At work I just go along with what other people do/say so I'm not outing myself. At home I talk to my husband and he'll say something and I miss 2/3 of it, I say what? He repeats it again and I hear a little more before I fade out and ask again, and then he usually goes, "What is the matter with you?" I won't tell him this is predelusional behavior, I don't know what he will think. I just try to rest and reality check myself, like okay there isn't anything over by the mailbox, and no, the thing hovering in the sky isn't an alien ship, it's an airplane. I think.

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