For those of us who've been at the meds game for a long time

[MiaB]

Do you remember (on your own, without reference to notes you might have taken along the way) everything about the side effects and impact of every medication combo you've been on?  In fact, do you actually remember every med you've been on?

 

I'm curious because I've been on psych meds in one form or another since 1999, although the BP diagnosis only formally came in 2004, and I'm honestly not sure if the list of past meds I've put in my signature covers everything I've been on. I'm also not 100% certain how they all affected me and in which combinations.   I often see questions posted on the boards that I feel I should be able to respond to - for example, things relating to wellbutrin and lamictal, both of which I know I was on for years - but I can't remember anything worth reporting.  

 

I strongly suspect this is lithium-related brain and memory rot, but it's pretty disconcerting.  If my pdoc and all her records were to disappear, I have no idea how I'd start with a new doctor because I don't know if the picture I have in my head of my psych treatment history is accurate.

[dilemma]

I remember most of my meds and side effects, but there were a few times when I desperately tried one drug after another when I was really symptomatic, and I think I remember which ones I tried, but I don't remember the reasons I had to keep switching. I also once went to a new pdoc and he tried to take me off the drugs I was on and put me on other drugs, and we switched at every appointment, and I couldn't keep them straight.

[jt07]

I remember all my meds. There are just two meds where my mind is sketchy because I took them for a short time as a teenager and they didn't really have any positive or negative effects, namely lithium and Marplan (an MAOI). I just know that they didn't help, and the lithium gave me a tremor. All my other meds, I know exactly what they did and how I felt. If you ask me about a certain med, I can almost feel how it made me feel, if that makes any sense.

 

I know that the worst class of meds for me were the tricyclic antidepressants. They not only made me feel tired, but they made me feel spacey - quite unpleasant. And they did nothing for my depression. To this day, doctors want me to try Elavil again. I spent most of my teens in an Elavil induced fog. Stupid me tried it again a couple of times with the same effect. Never again.

 

Edit: I don't mean to come down so hard on Elavil. It helps a lot of people. It just isn't the med for me.

Edited December 25, 2013 by jt07

[KeepGoing]

I don't remember all the meds I've been on. All the early ones are kind of a blur because I hadn't found effective relief then. I was still adrift at sea, as it were.

I sometimes find it frustrating that I can't remember how long I took something, or how it made me feel, or things like that. I chalk it up to having ADHD along with my other issues. ADHD affects my working memory, so things don't always getting "written to disk" in an effective way, to coin a phrase.

I have vague notions of what has transpired, and it's not like I have amnesia, but nothing concrete comes to mind, and I usually am suspect of my memory when it comes down to it. In my case, I don't think it's medication-induced, because I've always kind of been this way. I can't tell you when I went on that vacation that one time although I know I've been there, or when I last visited so-and-so, and I couldn't tell you when I bought my car if I hadn't made myself memorize it.

I'm envious of people who say things like, "I last saw Uncle Joe in October of 1988. It was the second week, and it was a beautiful fall morning. We got up around 9:00 a.m., and..." I can't do that. It's the same with the meds.

I fake it a lot (i.e., I pretend I remember, and then change the subject), and it's one of the lesser issues I have because I can skate by without it affecting my day-to-day functioning, but it's real, and I do notice it. If it helps, it has never gotten worse, it just "is".

[Chiaroscuro]

I can remember all the meds i've been on & their effects, but I have trouble remembering timelines (like how long I was on a med & in what year etc).

[dancingteapot]

I had a good track record with remembering the meds I took. Now I don't remember nearly half the meds I've been on. There were times I was in a complete fog so I'm pretty clueless to what I've been taking. It kinda bothers me that I don't remember.

[mcjimjam]

I can remember all the meds I've taken, if I sit down and make a list, but I don't necessarily remember a lot of qualitative information about my time spent on them. I remember enough to classify the meds into not effective, partial remission and remission. But if say,  my doc asked me a specific question like, "how was your sleep on Edronax?" which I took in 2008, I would have no idea. I just remember that I felt it didn't help me at all and gave me a headache.

 

I think you are expecting too much of your memory to be able to remember a detailed medication history dating back to 1999. If you're concerned about that information being lost, you could get copies of your notes from your doctors and doctors you have seen and file them away, in case you ever need to refer back.

[Reverse The Polarity]

I can remember all the meds I've been on, although occasionally I require a memory jog. I find it's helpful to have maintained a journal, because then I can look at the entries for reference.

 

I don't remember how I felt on all my meds. Some meds stick out more in my mind as they produced strong side effects. I have a harder time recalling the effects of meds that didn't do much because - well, they didn't do much. I think it's just how the mind works sometimes. Also, if you'd experienced things like psychosis, it can impact on your cognitive faculties. 

[The Emperor]

I can remember all of the meds I've ever been on. The effectiveness, side effects, usually length of treatment but not always. 

 

But ...all of this HAS taken place in the past 6 years so, that's probably why it's so fresh.

[forgetmenot220]

I can remember my meds and what the main side effects were (like the reasons I switched). As for duration, I just remember general times, nothing specific. My past (and I've thrown my currents in) includes: celexa, prozac, risperdal, abilify, wellbutrin xl, effexor xr, abilify, latuda, saphris, haldol, cogentin, and...I think that's it. I've tried risperdal twice and abilify on and off.

[hagar]

I can't remember them all. And I probably mistake which side effects came with each med, especially the early ones. And I've only been on the med-go-round since around '06.

[Wooster]

I'm glad that I made a tracking sheet when I was in the process of applying for SSDI. 

 

Since I've written it down in a reliable place, I no longer keep it in my head.

 

A lot of my memory of 2004-2009 is pretty sparse, so I probably would need prompting to remember them all.

 

However, I will always remember geodon as the med that made me feel like my forehead was falling off.

[melissaw72]

I can't remember them all.  If you named one I can say if I have tried it or not, but wouldnt be sure of the side effects (if any) that came with them.

 

The cocktail I am on now has been the main one for a very long time, so the other information of what meds I was on has basically left my brain.  My memory sucks.  I've been taking meds since 1991, but the antipsychotics didn't start until 1995.

[Jessamine]

Nope, I can remember a lot of them, but there's a few I kind of guess at or think they sound familiar but I'm not real sure if I took them or not. Then there's times I can remember being on meds but just plain can't recall what on earth they were.

[DogMan]

i remember the names of meds, but details are sketchy [dx 2003]

 

i don't remember half my episodes, so taking histories largely involves me saying " iono" and probably pdoc writing "pronounced mental impairment and memory loss"

[Phoenix_Rising]

I wish I would have written down everything I took and its effect.  There are certain meds I'm sure about having taken, but others...not so much.  My memory is especially holey when it comes to the SSRIs I've taken.  This should be in "The Handbook" :  write down name of med, side effects and effect on symptoms.

[Music]

I can't remember all my meds and I definitely don't remember all the side effects. My pdoc often reminds me of meds I've apparently been on and don't remember and quickly flips through her notes and reminds me what the side effects were. I'd be lost without my pdoc's notes.

[Geek]

I can't remember the meds I've been on or their side effects except for a few choice ones (those with unusual side effects as in Wooster's example). That said, I work in a technical field and have a high appreciation for data.    I keep a spreadsheet with my meds with the following columns: diagnosis/condition to be treated; start month/year; stop month/year; prescribing doc; benefits and side effects including reason for stopping.

 

I wish I had also kept track of doses/titration schedules especially if I needed a stronger dose after a while of stability. Oh well. I have been treated by too many doctors to be able to easily go back and get notes. I've got a good pdoc now, stable relationship with her. She was pleased with the spreadsheet I brought to my first appointment as it makes her job a little easier (she also teased me for it, good-naturedly).

[Rabbit37]

I'm fairly certain I can remember which meds I've been on, and the reasons for dropping them. What I can't remember, however, is the combinations that were taken together, or the prescribing pdoc. Memory gets worse when it coincided with a bad episode.

 

I honestly can't recall how long I've been on my current cocktail, I would have to research that. Years, I know that.

[bobhope74]

i have been on meds for 9,and approaching 10 years,i remember the main meds i been on but forgo(untill just now)for example amantadine a med i was given for the side effects that didnt work.and i couldnt remember how i felt on each med i only remember things that stand out for some special reoson,it doesnt seem to me that this is abnormal or need to worry thats just my oponion though

also i agree(someone i think mentioned), thier are methods,memory tricks and games that have been actually proven to improve your memory thier are books on the subject and probaly lots of stuff on the net?

[mellifluous]

no, miab...not even close.

 

i think i could tell you generally which ones worked well before discontinuation

which i discontinued immediately

which did nothing

 

but i'd need help to jog memory on every last one

and i'd defo need to look up side effects taht weren't super pronounced

[Jay Lith]

I pretty much remember which things I've taken and whether I had side effects -  until the last few years it was only one at a time which makes it easier. The bit that gets really difficult is knowing whether any of them actually helped - since I was always pretty variable anyway, and it's hard to disentangle the effects of life events /meds /random mood cycles.

[shesellsseashells]

I began taking medication when I was 11 years old, and I'm now 38.  It would have been helpful to have kept better records.  I generally recall whether I have tried a medication, but unless the side effects were remarkable (crazy full-body rash, massive hair loss) memories run together for me.  I had an excellent memory once upon a time, but now I find my life is less frustrating when I make lots of notes.  I've started doing that with my meds as of late.

[San]

I can remember by name.. I keep track and if someone mentions a med I can generally say "Oh that did this and that and combined with that it did this.."

I have a weird memory.

[MiaB]

Thanks to everyone who responded - lots of interesting thoughts.  I'm sorry I haven't answered in detail yet - my weekend was pretty much wiped out by a migraine - but I will when I can.

[crtclms]

I've been on meds since 1988 for bp (longer than that for migraine). I can remember all of the ones I have taken, but I can't remember the time line, and what order some things came in. I remember which ones gave me intolerable side effects, but I can't always remember what exactly the intolerable side effect was.

[IsabelleStPierre]

I personally can't remember all of the medications I've been on over the 30+ years I've been on meds. I do remember those medications that I've taken and caused either an adverse reaction or an allergic reaction, which there are 127 medications that have cause these types of reactions. For me, since there are so many medications that put me in the hospital if I take them, those in my mind are the ones to remember. Just to make sure I don't forget all of allergic reactions, I wear a medic alert bracelet as well as a thumb drive with my complete medical history on it (I sleep walk and have gotten out of the house and property more than once) 

[Puddles2009]

I keep an updated medical book in case this ever happens, i simply ask my doctors for it and they give me copies

[wj74]

I can tell you what I took and what effect it had but I can't remember a timeline at all.

[The Emperor]

I was here right before I got any kind of diagnosis, so what helps is that my meds are listed in my signature in the order that I took them, basically. Short term memory is shit, but I think that list, IN ORDER, helps me recall what happened on them, somehow. I know it's ugly (the sig) but when I need to refer to it, I do.

 

I started keeping a med journal when I started taking pills.

 

I stopped after four meds, I think. I even wrote out the date, side effects, etc. Except on Zoloft. Couldn't find my ass (or reality) with both hands on that one, heh.

[xylene]

Remember all my meds since I self medicated.

[MiaB]

Well, I'm relieved to know that I'm not alone in this.  One thing that WILL always stand out in my head is Effexor, because being on it (and getting off it) was such a horrific nightmare.  I do wish that I had persisted with tools I used early on in my diagnosis - mood tracking, journalling and so on.  But now I couldn't even tell you where the journals are or what site I used for mood tracking.  Hell, if I didn't keep my meds in a pill box (which in itself is in a tupperware box along with my prn meds), I'd be drifting around in a symptomatic daze.

 

Remember all my meds since I self medicated.

 

 

ohhhkay, this is a bit of a worrying statement, which I'm not sure I want to pry into.

[saintalto]

The med list that grows and grows through out the years is a bit like a biography written in pills. They tell our story in some abstract way. What our diagnosis is or was or might be... when we were stable, when we were not and probably a lot more than that. Strange.

[melissaw72]

The med list that grows and grows through out the years is a bit like a biography written in pills. They tell our story in some abstract way. What our diagnosis is or was or might be... when we were stable, when we were not and probably a lot more than that. Strange.

 

Hey, that is a really good way of putting things in perspective.

[saveyoursanity]

I can remember things if prompted.  By myself with no aids, I can remember maybe half the meds I've taken.  If you let me look thru my notes, probably 80 or 90%.  If I'm having a conversation with someone who's on the ball enough to suggest the ones I might've left out, I'll get to100% pretty quick.

 

That's just the meds and what effects they had, though.  I only have the vaguest timeline of when.

[amicyco2]

Since I was first put on meds I've been on 15 different kinds of coctails and now with a dx of bipolar 2, BPD w/self harm, GAD, PTSD,ect..my choice of meds is getting limited. I'm now nown to 4 meds left that I haven't tried for bipolarand I'm worried they won't work either and I'll be stuck on the rollor coaster for ever. I don't wnt to be hospitalized to get back in control but that looks like an option the pdoc would consider. Frustrated and worried.

[HAL9000]

I started doing mood tracker before I started meds (To make sure they weren't turning me into a veg) and my GP does electronic records so I can go look at what was started and quit.    Without that I would have a difficult time rendering an accurate timeline.   As it is I've got an accurate start stop dates and my reactions (Journal wise) along with whatever was going on at the time.    Which btw is depressing as hell considering my relationship problems.  It did help make some sense over a few things and corrected some monster fibs by SO.     It would make good material for a book if someone was interested in reading stuff so depressing that after reading it they would want to jump in front of a bus.

[wj74]

Oh, I forgot all my past meds are online with my mood tracker. But I didn't say why I stopped them...maybe i will make a list.

[ImperfectJenny]

I've been on so many meds in the past 17 years, I can't remember them all. If someone mentions a drug to me, I might remember though. Some with nasty side effects stick out to me though. It's like my hospitalizations. I've lost track. meh. That makes me sad. 

[Lady Krazy Kat]

I've been at the "med game" consistently since 2006 (so like almost 8 years) but was on meds off and on as a teenager from 1999 to 2001.  I know I'm probably a weirdo for this, but I can remember every single medication (psychiatrically-speaking) that I've taken during both of those time frames and my general reaction to them, even those I took for only one day (heh, maybe those were more memorable because the side effects were that atrocious).  I also have an excel spreadsheet of all the meds, doses, side effects, general time I took them, and for how long for bringing to new pdocs.  I've done that since like 2010 and added as necessary.

 

For the most part, my discontinuations have been due to lack of treatment response or a response that made symptoms worse (or led to other symptoms), though I did give a couple things multiple tries (Lamictal, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Cymbalta, Seroquel), I don't know if it's because they were helpful or because they were the least bad.  (Though I would say, I would LOVE it if Wellbutrin worked for me, which is why I have been on it multiple times--  no side effects except the terrible side effect of severely increased anxiety... if depression rather than anxiety was my primary problem it would have been a great med for me.)