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I'm going to try to be coherant, but I'm not really sure whether I'm asking a question or just complaining to a group who might relate....

 

I am 30 years old and basically a functional invalid. I do not have a job, or friends, don't speak to my family, avoid most contact with people, and I don't even do chores or anything else people do with their daily lives.

 

Years ago I was Dx'd with OCPD, which I'm understanding is the primary cause of my incapablity to do anything, especially in combination with the chronic physical problems I have which exhaust me. When I was younger I had more energy to "keep trying" despite being constantly miserable, but don't even have that anymore. (I was also more oblivious, I think - it's a lot easier to get on with life when you can blame your problems on outside things instead of yourself.)

 

So here is my current dilemma: If the majority of my internal/external problems are caused by my PD, I should obviously seek to improve it, yes? Turns out my insurance, which I finally got after many long years without, just doesn't cover Personality Disorders. Poof! Apparently they aren't real disorders or something.

 

Which means, even if I go to a Pdoc for another disorder, I'm not even allowed to talk about having a PD or they won't pay for the visit.

 

I'm also discouraged by the fact that treatments for my disorders all have a terrible success rate as well.

 

So I don't know what to do. Not even sure what I'm asking. Anyone relate? Have suggestions? Wanna join the bitchfest?

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It sucks that personality disorders can still be excluded from treatment under the Affordable Care Act's expansion of mental health parity.

 

I found this article that talks a little bit about how to get treatment for the symptoms that your PD causes even if you aren't getting treatment for the PD itself.

 

http://usinsurancenet.com/answers/article/AA-00716

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http://pro.psychcentral.com/2013/expected-changes-in-mental-health-coverage-in-2014/001299.html

 

 

The Affordable Care Act (ACA) and the Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act (MHPAEA) of 2008 aimed to address the situation. But gaps in coverage might still exist even after both laws are fully implemented.

 

Under the MHPAEA, companies that employ 50 or more people and supply health insurance must include an equal level of mental and physical health coverage. The law prohibits different co-payments, deductibles, and visit restrictions.

 

Ideally, these changes would benefit 140 million Americans. However, the law is not always enforced and some people do not receive equal coverage. Also, employers are not required to provide mental health coverage. They also can exclude specific mental disorders from coverage. The Parity Act also does not apply to small businesses and individual health plans.

 

 

There might be something more current, but I don't have the brain to look for it right now.

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The other thing is, where I am, I could get a support worker to visit me in my home and help me make an action plan of things I wanted to do (like keep my food cupboards stocked, do chores, take my meds, go for a short walk once a week) and that was very much on my terms. Would something like that work, I know you are very isolated and it would be stress provoking, but could it be an option?

 

 

THIS.  I have fibromyalgia and BPD/C-PTSD and many many flashes of OCD-like behavior.  Having a support worker has been the difference between me screaming at everyone at the top of my lungs all the time and me being ok with life.

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Anyway, um, I guess my contribution is that my life is like 10000x better than it used to be but I'm still not happy, and I still think it's my fault.

 

I'm happy to talk about HOW it got better, and I don't really entertain suicide as my fantasy of choice anymore, which is a BIG difference, but I wish I wasn't absolutely certain that nearly everything that goes wrong or poorly or even just "off" in my life is completely and utterly totally my fault, if that makes sense.

 

I still want to trade my brain in for one that works properly.  It's just that now I recognize that other people think that's a dumb idea and maybe they're not entirely wrong.

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