Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org

I'm not taking it out on you, but I totally am.


iamnotafish
 Share

Recommended Posts

Oh coworker of mine, how I have so much to say to you. In the sum of it all, we work for a large company. We do basic customer service at the lowest possible level within this company. We get paid just a tad more than minimum wage. Three out of my five shifts a week I have to work with you and see you clogging up chat with your inane, obnoxious dribble. Is it really necessary to analyze every call you take? You constantly blame anything and anyone for whatever may have gone wrong or could have gone wrong. You seem to be incapable of accepting any responsibility for your actions. You lack basic problem solving skills. Nothing will ever be perfect. You cannot predict every call. Put on your big boy underwear, shut up, do the job to the best of your (meager) ability and accept that you're not perfect. No one is.

 

This is what I would like to say to him. Instead, I usually say subtle (okay, maybe not so subtle) things to him on chat to kind of give him the hint that we're all in the same boat, shit happens, and to get over it. (I'm never that point blank about it, but you know subtle.)

 

My problem with this is that as obnoxious and annoying as he is, I feel guilty, yes guilty, for my response to his behavior because someone close in my life that I do not have a good relationship with is the exact same way. It's the whole not being able to accept responsibility for your actions. I fuck up, you fuck up, we all fuck up. It's okay. I hate getting called out on my mistakes, but I don't blame someone or something else for them. I can be an adult and fess up, that yes, I made said mistake, I will learn from it and hopefully not do it again. But to act like everything you do is completely beyond your control and the universe is out to get you and otherwise if this didn't happen or if that wasn't that way, you would have been perfect. Seriously? Shut. Up.

 

This is a really obnoxious internal battle. I want to just say, with 100% confidence that this guy just sucks. But I still feel guilty! Argh! I don't even know how to explain myself. Does anybody understand where I'm coming from? I dislike his attitude and behaviors, but I feel like I'm letting it bother me more than it should because of my experiences with someone else. So I'm taking it out on him, even though I truly feel like he sucks, when I probably shouldn't.

 

I guess we both suck.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ick. When he comes to you with his 'issues', have you tried redirecting it back to him i.e. How do you think you could have handled it better? How can I help you? Basically anything to thrust the slimy weight of personal responsibility back on his shoulders, where it belongs. If he really is avoiding responsibility he will start avoiding you like the bubonic plague. Worst case scenario is that he ignores your prompts and just keeps it up. But, you can say you tried, and cease to feel guilty without being mean. 

 

Just a thought. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ick. When he comes to you with his 'issues', have you tried redirecting it back to him i.e. How do you think you could have handled it better? How can I help you? Basically anything to thrust the slimy weight of personal responsibility back on his shoulders, where it belongs. If he really is avoiding responsibility he will start avoiding you like the bubonic plague. Worst case scenario is that he ignores your prompts and just keeps it up. But, you can say you tried, and cease to feel guilty without being mean. 

 

Just a thought. 

 

He has started to kind of "settle down" or really just shut up everytime he gets in one of his "I blame everything and everyone for what just happened on that call" rants and I try to politely call him out on his obvious BS. The problem and why it's in a way so ridiculous that it bothers me is that this is a chatroom (I work from home, but I've met all my coworkers in person) for everyone who is currently working the same shift. No more than, oh I'd say 10-12 people at a time in a chatroom. So he's not necessarily directing his comments at me, but I am forced to read them as chat is used, well, for everything. Questions, comments, general chatter, and most importantly communication from supervisors. So he is doing this in front of supervisors as well and I see from time to time they try to point out things that he could have done differently or just helpful tips for in the future. He just gets so obsessed with that call that he just took and has to literally analyze it word for word and exactly what he did and exactly what the customer said and of course none of it is his fault because it was a "new situation" that he wasn't familiar with and couldn't figure out on his own. We've all worked there for six months now and that just further fuels the fire of him not being able to take responsibility. Ahh, so sorry, another rant! But, I do think per your advice, I have tried to kind of say things to put the responsibility back on his shoulders, and he does shut up faster than if you just let him keep chatting. So, it is a good thing to do, I just don't want to overstep my boundaries because I'm not superior to him in anyway, and my supervisors can see what I say just as much as they can see what he says. I'm sorry, this was all over the place!

 

 

Not to sound weird, but have you talked to any of your other coworkers or a supervisor real quiet like to mention that this guy gets on your nerves that much?

 

I have privately via personal phone calls with a few, very few, coworkers that I trust, tried to bring him up casually to get their feedback. The general response is "Oh, I know, but he's such a sweet guy, bless his heart." And then I'm like gnashing my teeth and quickly agreeing, "Oh yes, yes, sweet guy, uh huh, but you know he just never stops..." but it's not much of an outlet and I don't get the, I don't know, sympathy? that I'm looking for. So in that sense, it's more of a reminder to myself to put on my big girl panties, accept the fact that some people just are a certain way, and get over it. Doesn't make it any easier, but ah, what can you do?

 

I have been too hesitant to bring it up with my supervisors. Since it isn't like he is calling me out for his mistakes directly or just venting to me personally, I feel like there is little they can do that they haven't already tried to do (commenting on his rants via chat). I can only secretly hope he gets fired soon for his constant mistakes. (Shut up guilt!)

 

Thank you everyone for the feedback!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Arg!!! I understand now - painfully incompetent, but such a sweet guy... Vomit. How Machiavellian are you? It seems like you have limited options - pointing out obvious shortcomings of a popular employee never works very well. I've tried.  If you were so inclined, you could gently and persistently egg him on to reveal all of his failings on each call. Eventually people will notice. Especially if you can link scenarios i.e. "Just like that call yesterday''.... Give him enough rope to hang himself with, while maintaining a supportive front. It takes a while, and if the job doesn't pay much he might be replaced with someone worse. Acceptance is the simple, albeit far less gratifying solution. 

 

As my most favorite supervisor once wearily pointed out: 'when all you pay is peanuts, all you get is monkeys'. She made 0.25 more than everyone else, lol. 

 

Good luck. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

He's obviously not suited to Customer Service, have you tried talking to him about his interests and thinking about other jobs, if he really is as bad as what your saying then Customers will begin to complain about him and then he might be out of a job anyways.

 

I would try not taking it on, just let it slide over you. Maybe move cubicle?

Edited by neptunesky
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...