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I'm just wondering what this would be classed as....


Every morning I get to work and email (from personal email) my BFF and partner. 


After 2.5 hours, no responses.  Weird.  But I don't freak out, I text my partner to see if he has a busy morning and email my friend from a different account (the first one I used is a forwarded account). 


Nothing.  Text my partner again a few more times. 


Start to get upset.  Sometimes I am certain I have done things that I can't seem to verify.  This feels like this, an emptiness. 


I am scared that this emptiness, this blankness where my memories should be and responses from my BFF and partner should be are because I'm a figment of an imagination, that I'm not real.  That I don't exist. 


I call my partner a few times.  No response.  I becomes more convinced.  I'm not sure anyone at work could see me, or if they're real either.  Maybe they are also figments? 


I send partner some weird texts asking him to get in touch so that I can know I am real.  Nothing.


I spend about 30 minutes crying, because I am not real.  Then I get an email from BFF...she is home sick and hasn't checked her email yet.  Partner calls 20 minutes later....he was out and forgot his phone.


I felt shakey the rest of the day. 


I know I'm not 'optimally' stable at the moment, but what is this?  Anything?

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Does this feeling only happens when your partner doesn´t respond your texts? or does it happen in any other circumstances?

I read the link you posted. Very interesting, I had never heard about this disease.

However it reminds me of "derealization" and "depersonalization" which I have experience.

If the feeling happens only when your partner doesn´t respond your texts, it sounds that the anxiety it produces may be causing derealization. If on the other hand it is more chronic or it happens under other circumstances then it sounds it is the disease you posted in your link.

Edited by CookieN
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Sometimes I get this feeling that things I remember doing didn't happen. 


I think today it was because I was already anxious - I wasn't at work yesterday because I was anxious and I have found that my weird thoughts are better when I'm not stressed - so I think it was a perfect storm. 

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