lady Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 I was on lithium for a while and then I went off of it (tapered off) and had an episode in that wound up landing me in the hospital... so obviously I went back on it But it just gives me this weird, dull feeling I can't describe, like I just don't feel "alive" and I hate it....and I'm really just never "happy" I don't mean manic but just happy. I'm not "flat" though. It almost feels like I'm punching my fists into a concrete wall (if that even makes sense?) My new pdoc almost seemed to suggest I should go off it but I don't think that's a good idea because I haven't had a single manic episode since being on it and I don't think any medications would stop my manic episodes completely like it has. I just hate the idea that I have to stay with this dull feeling forever to be able to be sane enough to even live in society... Does anyone know what I mean?? I just don't know how to describe it. I'm considering asking my doctor if I should try a lower dose but even that feels risky.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcjimjam Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Could it be a symptom of depression? If you have recently had a manic episode you might still be in that "crash" period after. Personally I haven't experienced this on lithium. My blood level is only 0.6mmol/l, so that may be why. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MisterJoshua Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 I have a similar relationship to lithium. It totally stops any manic episodes for me, but I feel like everything is blunted somehow. I guess I have always chalked it up to nothing being as exciting as what I feel during a manic episode, so I try not to do that comparison. I just try to remind myself that a manic episode is worse than not being able to fully feel. But that doesn't always work. My med compliance is shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Horizons Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 My fiance felt exactly the same way you describe when he was on Depakote and eventually chose to stop taking it because of the dull feeling it gave him, a decision I fully supported because it was clearly making him miserable. I don't know what other meds you are on or what else you've tried in the past, but some atypical anti-psychotics are highly effective at preventing manic episodes for most people and may be an option, though they can have other side-effects. My fiance is stable so far on Zyprexa, which doesn't have the same dulling effect. Really, I don't think feeling dead inside is a fair trade for avoiding manic episodes unless you've tried absolutely every other option. You're also a lot less likely to remain med-compliant in the long-term if the drugs are making you feel that way, IMO, which may be one of the reasons your doctor is urging a change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
San Posted February 25, 2014 Share Posted February 25, 2014 Have you had your levels checked? They could be too low or too high. Horizons has a good point. It's hard to stay compliant if the med makes you feel crappy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crtclms Posted March 4, 2014 Share Posted March 4, 2014 Apathy can be a side effect of lithium. I had it for about the first month, but haven't had problems with lithium since. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
San Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 When starting lithium, you do lose the mania and depression, and it can flatten you out for a while. If you're coming from mania or hypomania, it'll crush it, and you might go below "baseline" for a bit while your body and mind adjust to it. That can happen with a lot of meds. Give it a bit more time, see what happens. I never had much flattening (or as crtclms better describes it, apathy) on lithium, but starting it, I was a bit dull. It went away to be one of the best meds I took. Unfortunately, due to personal health issues (and very rare ones that most doctors had never seen or heard of) I had to stop taking it.. which sucked.. it worked so well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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