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Hello. You can call me Canuck... because, well, I'm Canadian. I'm a 30 year old guy working verrry slowly through an undergraduate degree in Music/Theatre & Film. I would love to be a working actor. I prefer stage to screen, and musical theatre holds a dear place in my heart.


My current diagnosis is bipolar disorder. Bipolar I with psychotic features, to be exact. I had psychotic symptoms even as a child, and frequently held the belief that if I had a photograph of someone, or a poster or picture, they could watch me out of the eyes of their picture. My sister had a Spice Girls poster in her bedroom and I was absolutely convinced that Baby Spice was spying on me. I also believed that if I thought about someone, like a friend, they would be able to see out of my eyes. To be honest, these are enduring delusions that I still believe frequently no matter what med cocktail I am on.


The mood symptoms began with puberty and gradually got worse. In 2008 the moods were so pronounced that my therapist made me promise to go to the hospital if I was in danger. One day the people on the subway were telepathically telling me to die, so I went to the hospital. They admitted me, but I guess they discounted the psychosis because first they diagnosed me as atypical depression.


Eventually the mania and psychosis came out, and I shut myself in my hospital room and refused to come out because I believed that I was radioactive and people would die. My diagnosis was amended to be bipolar I with psychotic features.


My current psychiatrist is wonderful, I am so lucky to have her. For a short while, schizoaffective was being considered as my diagnosis. I haven't had intense or lasting psychosis for about a year though so I think it remains bipolar.


I am also transgender, female-to-male. My bipolar disorder was relatively under control until I started hormones. Since then, it's been a scramble to find the right medication. I am not on the right medication yet. I've been mostly depressed since January.


That's some of who I am. Nice to meet you all.

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Hi. I'm 30 and SZA bipolar female. Nice to meet you.

I did some musical theatre not by acting but was actually in a pit orchestra. I even got accepted to a summer school for children and adolescents who excelled in music or theatre. It was my niche in school. The band geek. Haha. I did pit orchestra, pep band, marching band, etc. I recently sold my clarinet and I miss it. During my short college years I played In the college band too.

I like to sing too. Never had any training but I like karaoke.

Anyways sorry now I'm just blabbing. I think you will like it here. And lol your profile pic is funny! Lmao clever!

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Hi, Canuck and welcome to Crazyboards.  I ask new members to please read the rules, just so we are all on the same page.


I enjoyed theatre in college, also, but I really loved the backstage stuff.  When they picked me to be in a play, I was usually a spear-carrier or the middle-aged auntie.


It sounds like you have traveled a long and lonesome road.  I hope you find our website to be supportive and informative.



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