Why aren't people so trusting of others anymore?

[madmax15]

This has bugged me for a while. I know in the 70's or something you could leave your back door open without worrying about it. People were more trusting of others back then. Ted Bundy could do what he did because people were more trusting back then. NOW at least where I am people are more hypervigilant.

I don't know the answer. But why aren't people so trusting of others anymore?

[Stickler]

Ted Bundy could do what he did because people were more trusting back then. 

Part of your answer right there...

It's actually interesting though...I understand the crime rate, at least in the US, is at record lows...a cursory search says the crime rate's down in Australia too.

But I think media attention to crimes and criminality is more abundant than it used to be, therefore people are more likely to worry  about crimes occurring.

[melissaw72]

 

But why aren't people so trusting of others anymore?

 

Probably because there are those assholes out there that screw things up for others, using their freedom to get away with shit.

[olga]

The crime rate in this country is down these days---it's much lower than it was in the 70s.  I lived in Manhattan in the 70s, and the violent crime rate was much higher than it is now in NYC.

 

I haven't locked my house inn years and I leave my keys in the car every night.  *shrug*  I don't know how you can make such sweeping statements such as "people were more trusting of others back then."  Were you alive in the 70s?  I was, and I don't see that much difference these days.

 

olga

[madmax15]

The crime rate in this country is down these days---it's much lower than it was in the 70s. I lived in Manhattan in the 70s, and the violent crime rate was much higher than it is now in NYC.

I haven't locked my house inn years and I leave my keys in the car every night. *shrug* I don't know how you can make such sweeping statements such as "people were more trusting of others back then." Were you alive in the 70s? I was, and I don't see that much difference these days.

olga

Maybe the crime rate was so high because people were more trusting of others?

[Stickler]

Demographics changes.  More people, worldwide, have moved to urban areas.  Less live in rural areas and/or very small towns.

 In the city, you do kind of have to lock up.

Edited June 6, 2014 by Stickler

[madmax15]

An example was Ted Bundy. Do you really think he could do what he did in the 2000's?

[Stickler]

...The last time I heard there was someone murdering hookers on the north side of here.

13 dead so far, same MO, no suspects. 

 

This guy *may* be the "I-45 killer" responsible for the murder of about 30 girls:

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2170500/The-mystery-Texas-Killing-Fields--And-man-hold-answer-30-young-women-murdered-there.html

 

But I'm not seeing any confirmation of that.

 

(GF likes true crime stuff.  Also Golden Girls reruns and American Football. *shrug*)

 

So, could someone be a serial killer?  sure.

 

Generally it helps if you're killing people that society doesn't keep a close eye on, like the homeless and/or street prostitutes.  Sadly.

Edited June 6, 2014 by Stickler

[crtclms]

Some studies have said the drop in the crime rate is partially attributed to stopping the use of leaded gasoline. The drop in crime became steep roughly 20 years after the air became unleaded. (Sorry, I'm being lazy and not re-reading the article tonight).

 

It really is safer. There was a lot of violence in the 60s and 70s.

[melissaw72]

The crime rate in this country is down these days---it's much lower than it was in the 70s.  I lived in Manhattan in the 70s, and the violent crime rate was much higher than it is now in NYC.

 

I haven't locked my house inn years and I leave my keys in the car every night.  *shrug*  I don't know how you can make such sweeping statements such as "people were more trusting of others back then."  Were you alive in the 70s?  I was, and I don't see that much difference these days.

 

olga

 

Holy crap ... that concept is so not real (for lack of better words; I can't think) for me.  I would never even think of keeping things unlocked here, and I live in a safe town (knock on wood).  If I could drive I'd never leave my keys in my car either.  Anything could happen.  I'm glad you live in an area you can do that!

[MiaB]

I prefer not to reveal exactly where I live, though some may pick it up from what I'm about to say.  I am 41 years old, and the norm for my entire life has been to live in houses with bars on all the windows and security gates on the main access doors.  Residential properties are surrounded by walls, fences, and in a lot of cases, electric fences on top of that.  Right now I'm living in what we call a security complex, which is a set of houses to which outside access is controlled by security guards who also routinely make rounds of the complex. 

 

I should add that I am middle class, this is a very middle class, ordinary complex, and there is nothing weird or expensive/fancy about the suburb in which I live.  I am currently on my own, and having lived in a dangerous area for a year between 2010 and 2011, these are really the only circumstances in which I feel comfortable and safe nowadays.  The security gate on my front door is always locked, though I do feel safe leaving my front door (which is directly behind the gate) open while I'm at home, as long as the gate is secure.

 

I lived for a while in another country in the 90's, and was completely thrown by the fact that although I was staying in a rather downtrodden, not very pleasant, area, there was no hint of the bars/gates/fences etc with which I grew up.  It's also always been peculiar to me to watch American movies or tv shows and see no fencing or walls around people's houses.

 

On the other hand, I had a fantastic childhood in a small university town despite all these measures, and my friends and I ran wild around the place.  The great sadness now is that we have exceptionally high crime rates against children, and parents can no longer do what mine were able to do in the 1970's and 80's.

[Chimako]

I was alive in the 70's and we never ever left our doors or windows unlocked (well, unless I was sneaking).  We did leave the car unlocked sometimes but mostly it was always locked.  We lived in a semi-rural area, definitely not suburbia where the middle class lived.  The neighbors had chickens, another neighbor a cow, etc.  Not farms just houses with bigger yards.  Everybody I knew lived the same way, sometimes moreso since some parents would not leave even their teenage kids home alone.  If you knocked on someone's door in the middle of the night, you were just as likely to hear a shotgun being cocked as a "hello".  The police were extremely unreliable in the 70's even if you could get thru on the phone.

[MrTastybutt]

I'm like Olga. We've left the house unlocked both overnight and when we've left during the day. We've left the keys in the car before too. It's not rural but in the 'burbs. I've answered the door at 3 AM to give a lady $20 for gas. It's much better than what I remember growing up.

[Crodentia]

I think the ability to spread information more quickly has lent itself to some realizing how dangerous the world can truly be. Where I'm from, some folks feel comfortable leaving their doors unlocked. Others are paranoid to the point they act like it's the Cuban Missile Crisis, and the Soviets are going to come parachuting in Red Dawn style (the original, kiddos, not the remake). I think the fact people are more aware of things lends itself to that extra bit of caution some people take (especially in densely populated areas; violent crime/theft/burglary is often higher in cities than it is in rural areas).

[WinterRosie]

I feel that it depends on where you are and what subculture you're in. In my city are people who are both so scared that they have bars on the windows and doors and gates and fences (and these are also found in very disadvantaged parts of the city) while a two minute walk later will bring you to folks' houses that are left open. Because those people are into openness and value having people being able to come and go. Instead they use more passive security, such as dogs who if they know you will let you pass, and big guys who stay home. 

That openness is a subculture.

 

I think that people are less trusting partly because the (American) 24-hr news cycle is based on increasing fear and feelings of danger. Especially if you're a person of colour whose car broke down, this can end very badly for you. And if you're white, you're taught to fear everyone because you have something to lose (which is odd, because something that you can't lose is the colour of your skin). 

 

But I'm not from America, so what do I know? Michael Moore came here to observe how we don't lock our doors! The big scandal in a city east of me was that, when the bar let out in the wee hours of the morning, if you didn't lock your door someone would come in and satisfy their munchies from your fridge.

[BlurredBoundaries]

I live in a big city of poverty mixed with wealth.I think that has something to do with alot of the crimes around here...and there are alot of crimes.Like 10-40 shootings on a nice summer weekend.I have been mugged, chased, and raped so maybe that has something to do with not trusting.It goes to show you that people do prey on innocent people.

And I don't even wanna get started on how this whole generation is fucked up but I think part of it has to do with teenagers having babies, the media/tv/movies/music and also the way this generation advanced so much more quickly than earlier generations (cyber crimes/technology etc)

I don't have the brain power to write what I think in a legible manner but I hope you guys get the jist of what I'm trying to say.

[dianthus]

The crime rate in this country is down these days---it's much lower than it was in the 70s.  I lived in Manhattan in the 70s, and the violent crime rate was much higher than it is now in NYC.

 

I haven't locked my house inn years and I leave my keys in the car every night.  *shrug*  I don't know how you can make such sweeping statements such as "people were more trusting of others back then."  Were you alive in the 70s?  I was, and I don't see that much difference these days.

 

olga

 

Yeah, this is important.  The crime rate in the US is consistently LOWER now that it was in the 70s and 80s.

 

IMO, the biggest difference is that we're saturated with media now versus watching the news once or twice a day years ago, or reading the paper.  So we hear EVERYTHING, and all of the news is geared towards you watching more, clicking more, and staying glued to media. 

 

Plus, people have always lamented "the good old days" whether they really existed or not. 

[OliverB]

Where I was born, all houses had bars in their windows. It was a really dangerous place  (Southamerica)

 

The thieves steal even flowerpots, so you had to put cement on their basis if you have them in your garden (To stick the pot to the floor). Fences weren't enough to stop them, eh.

 

When I arrived to Italy and Spain, I realized: doors aren't lock during the day, there are not bars in windows, if there is a fence, is not a security fence, there are not gates...I have a garden in the front of my house, and it has a fence, though it is not a security fence, it is just there to mark out the area of the house (You can jump over it easily)

Edited June 20, 2014 by Bixo

[mellifluous]

This has bugged me for a while. I know in the 70's or something you could leave your back door open without worrying about it. People were more trusting of others back then. Ted Bundy could do what he did because people were more trusting back then. NOW at least where I am people are more hypervigilant.

I don't know the answer. But why aren't people so trusting of others anymore?

Because people have been fucked over and learn a lesson or been subjected to others' abuse or dogma and then it's like , you fuck me once, shame on you, fuck me twice and shame on me

[madmax15]

you fuck me once, shame on you, fuck me twice and shame on me

That's why I am wary who I am nice to. Sad it has to come to this but I HAVE to protect myself.

[Stickler]

 

you fuck me once, shame on you, fuck me twice and shame on me

That's why I am wary who I am nice to. Sad it has to come to this but I HAVE to protect myself.

 

I test people.

 I hand them a bit of trust and see what they do with it.  

 

I also have figured out really super charming people usually are trying to manipulate.

I try to be kind to people simply because I like brightening people's days and because I poop rainbows and whatever, but I'm wary of REALLY saccharine people because they usually want my freakin' money.

[melissaw72]

 

I test people.

 I hand them a bit of trust and see what they do with it.

 

I do this at times also.

[crtclms]

When we lived in San Jose, for one thing we had a sliding glass patio door facing the front yard, really secure. There was a dog door attached. If I ever got locked out, I'd lie down on the pavement, push the sliding doorway cover up high enough that it fell off, then reached inside the dog door to unscrew a thingy to ope the patio door. But seriously, if someone wanted to break in, there was a big patio door to go through.

 

So we didn't lock the door every night (we did sometimes). And I always felt safe enough to leave my car unlocked.

 

In fact, for those of you who own a Prius, maybe you will understand.

 

Prius engines shut off if you are waiting at a light, for instance, to cut down fuel consumption.

 

Well, DH and I went grocery shopping, and in the confusion of unloading the car, and putting stuff away, I couldn't hear the car, so I assumed it was turned off.

 

The next day, our neighbor knocked on our door, and asked "Do you know that your engine has been running all night?" ACK! I left the car on with the keys in the ignition for 12 hours. Thank god it was a Prius, we actually didn't burn through very much gas.

 

But as you see, we were pretty relaxed. And San Jose and suburbs is huge, so it isn't small town friendliness. but our street had a lot of nice people.

 

in Utah, we lock the doors, but there are so many windows in the house, again, I am not sure how protective that would be. Salt Lake City is experiencing a rash of burglaries.

[Stickler]

I don't lock my car because if they want in badly enough they WILL break the fucking window and get in anyway.

 

This has happened to me twice so far.

Both times the cost of the items taken was far under the replacement cost of the car window.

[tamagotchi]

I don't bother locking the door if I'm only out for a little while, I forget to lock the door, I've forgotten to close the door and left it open for many hours more often than once.  I've forgotten to close the car door and left it open overnight.  We don't lock our back yard gate, our shed door doesn't have a working lock (and we have a lot of stuff in there).  There are burglars in the neighborhood for sure... I just don't really feel that it makes a huge difference to lock the door because if someone actually wants to steal stuff, it's not hard to break in. 

[Chimako]

 

 

Prius engines shut off if you are waiting at a light, for instance, to cut down fuel consumption.

 

I have one, when we first got it we called it the ninja car.  Now it scares me when people in the parking lot don't hear it.  I've had more than a few just walk right out in front of me and surely all of them weren't suicidal.

[Wonderful.Cheese]

I lock everything. I'm very paranoid about people stealing from me. I lock my gym bag. It only has like a hairbrush in it. I just know people want to steal from me. All our doors remain locked and my car gets locked in the garage. I lock my car door right away when I get in it.

I can't fathom leaving a house door or car unlocked. It would drive me batshit with paranoia.

And we live in a safe town too.

[melissaw72]

 

I'm very paranoid about people stealing from me.

 

Me too ... I can relate.  I've gotten better about it over the years, but it still gets to me.  How it started was people really were stealing from me, I had to involve the police, the people got evicted, etc, and ever since then I am paranoid that it will happen again.  I taped my windows down, etc.

 

People are real nice and all where I live, but I still never know.  When I go somewhere it seems like I take so much stuff with me that I *shouldn't* need to, but I just don't want anything stolen.

[crtclms]

 

 

 

Prius engines shut off if you are waiting at a light, for instance, to cut down fuel consumption.

 

I have one, when we first got it we called it the ninja car.  Now it scares me when people in the parking lot don't hear it.  I've had more than a few just walk right out in front of me and surely all of them weren't suicidal.

 

When I have rented cars since we got the Prius, they seem super loud, sometimes I actually wonder if something is wrong with the catalytic convertor, until someone tells me there isn't. Do they still even use catalytic convertors?

[Em0tionallyUnStAbLe]

In real life, I don't give people the time or day. Been burnt too many times, and i won't deal with lies, partake in drama and be little just so said can feel good about themselves. I won't let people close because I won't have to deal with the fallout or being hurt again. Others expect trust. Well too bad, none here to give. 

[Hupcake]

I give ppl a fair shake...but at arms length.

I live in a very simple very small town. Everyone's idea of good time is either going to bar to get drunk, going to house to get drunk or Both. Oh and smoke pot. Pretty much that's it here.

The ones I have met are pretty untrustworthy so I don't bother. The ex burned a lot of trust out of me. Even afterwards he kept messing with me.... Till i wasn't useful anymore.

The day he was fired from our company,He actually got mad at me because His boss asked if the computer he used was mine or his . I said techniquely it was mine but I was leading it to him. So she returned to me......that was 9 glorious months ago.

I don't lock anything at when kids are here. When I am alone , we are locked up.

[crtclms]

I hope that I approach each person as an individual. Because each person is his or her own combination of good and bad impulses. Some aren't worthy of trust, but they are by no means the majority. I think I am positive with new people, yet wary.

 

Everyone gets burned in friendships and with romantic partners at various points in his or her life. It's part of learning what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship. It's healthy to try and to fail, and to try again.

[SoaringRaven]

For me, I feel like it's a mixture of experience and culture.

In Massachusetts, you're conditioned to ignore strangers and be very wary if they're friendly towards you (since they probably just want something from you.)

As for experience, I grew up in a middle-class neighborhood, but it is close to a poor area with a lot of drug problems. My parents house and garage were burglarized many times, including by my brother's so-called friends. The reason I mentioned the drug problems is because on several occasions the burglars were addicts, and they were stealing so they could get drug money.

For some reason my parents -still- don't lock their doors... they want to be trusting and they tried to teach me to be trusting. This "trust" has only screwed us over.

I've been the victim of bullying, burglaries, assaults, muggings, and rapes (in several cases these happened because I was to trusting, in all the cases of rape and most incidents of bullying) I've learned to be very wary of people. I can see the cruelty and selfishness present in humans, and I do my best to avoid being a victim.

I keep my doors locked. I don't live in first-floor apartments, so my apartments are harder to break in to. I carry mace. I don't interact with strangers, and I give them the "death glare" if they try to talk to me.



I feel like in a lot of cases the media is to blame, but some of this lack of trust also comes from people being victims. Being robbed or raped, for example, can quickly turn a trusting person into a paranoid/suspicious person.

There is also the fact that most of us no longer live in communities. We don't know our neighbors. We don't have the sense of security that comes with knowing we're surrounded by decent people.

[catflapjack0]

My general theory on this is much as the same as it ever was, the 24/7 glut of instantaneous journalism from a kazillion 'sources' has just exposed us to reality.

[ovOidampUle]

Everyone's focussing on crime, but what about other trends that may have influenced people trust? 

 

For instance, the impoverishment of community life. With couples each having (at least) one job, there is less time to build ties to the local community. People move more often, sometimes to places far away, further isolating them.

 

Due to the poor economy, people might be more afraid for their shit because they have less of it, and less ability to buy more. At the same time, having shit seems a lot more important than it used to because of greater income inequality and class insecurity. 

 

Church is most powerful community-building tool ever devised with the exception of armies in war time -- and people are going there less and less (except for a few people -- Evangelicals -- who are going more and more).

 

Ethnic diversity is up. People used to be able to live in a neighborhood where everyone was like them, maybe not so much anymore. 

 

None of those factors are about crime, per se, but they do effect our feeling of trust in the society around us. I have no idea if any of that is true, but thought I'd throw it out there. 

[cady]

My house was burgled when i was five years old, although it was locked and we had insurance ive grown up not trusting people,ironically we lived next door to a policeman at the time, i always lock doors, and wouldnt be able to sleep unless i knew doors were locked.

I also dont trust people around my person, every time ive gone against my instincts its gone wrong. Bad relationshipshave meant i dont trust men not to hurt me.