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Reasons why I shouldn't self harm

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Sorry you are having a hard time, Mia.

I am also having a hard time. I feel strongly that harming is ok right now, considering what I am feeling and what is going on with me.

The only thing I feel able to do right now is postpone my self harm until tomorrow night.

I am confused. I want to feel in control. I can do that with a knife but I can also do it with getting through yet another urge.

My mind fights me. "What commitment?" it says. "You really want this" and "You NEED this".

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • 2 months later...

it is too hot and humid to wear long sleeves and a scarf

i don't need to make myself any uglier

my immune system is challenged already.  at best, three quarters of my life is sick days.  giving myself wounds is asking for more trouble and more sick days.

i should say some more positive things but i can't right now

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  • 8 months later...

reasons why I shouldn't:

the deeper cuts will become scabs that I will pick at obsessively until i have a nasty scar on my body that will probably never go away

it's hard to show off and flex my arm muscles when there's cuts all over my arms (i've been working out lately hehe) 

(in my case) I don't have to cut JUST to get scabs. i'll get scabs to pick at from other things that don't involve hurting myself. 

cutting myself because i made a mistake isn't the best way to deal with failure. everyone makes mistakes. everyone has their failures. i'm no exception, even if I think I am. 

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After having quit self-harming for a few years, I had a laser treatment to remove the reddish-purple coloring of my scars. The coloring was making the scars even more noticeable than they already/still are. If I self-harm, I'll either have to deal with bright colored scars or pay for this treatment again. That's why I shouldn't self-harm.

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  • 7 months later...
On Friday, June 13, 2014 at 0:30 PM, Wooster said:

I think the threads you are looking for usually start out with "why should I bother stopping" or something like that.


Pros of self harm:

-it's something that almost always works to change my internal reality

-I have a concrete way to "take care" of myself

-it's more regulated (for me) than drinking

-it distracts me from my emotional state

-if needed, it's a way to ask for help or show people how hard it is when I don't have words

-it interrupts the constant bombardment of intrusive body sensations (this is a really big one for me)

-ETA it keeps me from trying to make myself be dead


Cons of NOT harming:

-I have to tolerate my distress and not escape it

-I have to come up with ways to distract myself

-it is unpleasant and uncomfortable

-it takes effort to use my skills

-sometimes my skills don't work as well as I want them to


Cons of harming:

-it hurts

-it makes scars

-I spend money on first aid supplies when I could be saving or spending that on something fun

-risk of infection or harming so much I need stitches/other medical care

-I have to fess up to my therapist which is awkward and uncomfortable and embarassing

-I might have to do another stupid fucking annoying chain analysis

-I feel ashamed

-I worry/scare/distress/anger/confuse people I care about

-it's something I would NEVER EVER do to another human being

-it's not consistent with my values


Pros of NOT harming:

-no new scars, therefore no more embarassing moments or having to hide parts of my body from people who care about me

-leading to being comfortable wearing shorts and tanktops on hot days

-not spending money on first aid supplies

-my brain is more free to think about other things

-I get long term satisfaction from how I handle my emotional distress instead of shame

-I feel proud of my decision to handle things differently

-I feel more comfortable in my body



I'm sure there are more. This is just what comes to mind off the cuff.

I hate that I have to wear bracelets to cover my scars.

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Because I don't want my husband to find physical evidence that I am still engaging in self harm, thereby using it against me in court so I look too unstable to keep my children. 

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  • 1 month later...

Not worrying about hiding it

Painless showers

Being able to wear shorts and short sleeves

Not worrying about infection

Not being afraid of body checks

Not worrying people

Not being hospitalized

Not lying to my therapist when she asks if I hurt myself this week



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  • 5 months later...
3 hours ago, MichaelRamirez said:

I don't actually understand why you should hard yourself. In such a way, you disappoint your close relatives. 

This is not helpful. Did you join just to pass judgement on the members who legitimately use the self injury forum for support? 

Edited by MiaB
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