thebaseball2001 Posted August 31, 2014 Share Posted August 31, 2014 Hi Everyone, I just came across these boards doing a random search on Google. I have read a few threads and I figured I would join and see if anyone could offer me some advice. A quick background. I have had bouts of depression since my early 20's (I am 41 now) and it has never been as bad as it is now. When I was in my 20's it was mild and I think I managed it with Prozac for a little while and then just drank a lot. In my early 30's I found Lexapro and that was my ace in the hole. It made me feel like I didn't care about the things that were bothering me and a nice side effect was that it made a lifelong intravert who cared about what everyone thought about him not care anymore. Last year around June I had a major panic attack. I had never had anxiety like that, I was always more of a depressed person. The attack was so bad that I call 911. While at the hospital I mentioned that I had been sparring with someone that same day (I like to box in for exercise and sport) and they hit me in the open portion on the top of my headgear so hard that their knuckle came through their sparring glove and they broke their knuckle. That made the physician think possible concussion so the did a CT scan and the results were negative. They attributed my experience that night to a panic attack and sent me home. The next weekend was July 4th and my family and I went to the beach. I was at the hotel by myself and here comes another panic attack. The same feeling as before, a rush of warmth running over my whole body followed by racing thoughts. I was able to talk myself down. But on and off throughout the following weeks I would have these same sensations. It was always that warm rush and an "uh oh" thought. Finally in October I had another really bad one. I went to the hospital again and again it was attributed to anxiety. This time they gave me a few Xanax and sent me home. Things were different in the following months than they had been after the first panic attack. I felt "disconnected" from my surroundings. It bothered me to feel that way that it would create more anxiety. I would sit at work all day worried about myself, worried about death, thinking about lifes meaning. I saw one pdoc and he put me on celexa because he could go higher in dose than on Lexapro. It was terrible and he was not very helpful when I called him about it. He told me to stop cold turkey and I had been on it a month. I asked if there would be any side effects and he said no (I knew better). I called him later that night telling him I was feeling even worse and he said "maybe its because you stopped cold turkey" but I hadn't even stopped yet, it was the same day. I quit him. I went to another pdoc and he put me back on Lexapro with Wellbutrin. That didn't work well so he tried Zoloft. It was still the same, anxious about life, feeling disconnected, thinking about death. Eventually I quit him. I am currently on my 3rd pdoc and she started by having me take clonozapam mg along with the Zoloft at a higher dose. No good so she recently moved me to 50mg Pristiq (weaned me off Zoloft over 3 weeks) along with clonozapam 5mg in the morning and clonozapam 5mg in the evening. I felt great the first week but the next week was back to how I was before. She thought that may have been because I still had some Zoloft in my system that first week and it made for a good combination with the Pristiq. She upped me to 100mg Pristiq with the Clonozopam 5mg in the morning and evening. After a few weeks of that not working well she moved me to 150mg Pristiq. I just stopped that today because after 5 days of that dose I felt crazy. Everything around me was weird, I felt like there was a dark cloud around me and I couldn't think. I was out at the store and felt like I could easily just pass out but I never did. This morning I went back to 100mg. I am going back to her next week. Bad part is I lost my job of 7years just 2 weeks ago (yeah that doesn't help when you are depressed and anxious). My wife and I had just bought our 1st house and we have a 5 year old and a 5 month old. My question is, do you think the person I am currently going to knows what she is doing? As you can see from switching docs so much, I have trust issues with them. I am only asking because 150mg Pristiq seems like a lot and I have not been able to Google and find many people that talk about being on 100mg let alone 150mg. Lastly, does anyone think I should have went to a Neurologist or should go to one since this anxiety all started on the same day I was hit in the head? I know the CT scan was clear and I know you are not doctors, just asking opinions because I have had pdocs tell me no and my primary physician tell me I probably should have. Thanks! Chad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wooster Posted September 1, 2014 Share Posted September 1, 2014 Hi Chad. Sorry to hear you're having such a rough go of things with your anxiety and getting proper care. Welcome to CB. I've met some of the best people here, and it sucks that we all need to be here. It never hurts to rule out physical causes of things, so if you have access to a neurologist, it might be worth it to rule out any lingering symptoms of brain injury. It sounds like the cause might not alter the treatment, though. You have anxiety and depression. The good news is that in combination with meds, there are several therapies that might also be very effective in helping you feel and function better. Have you taken up with a tdoc (therapist) yet? Preferably someone who specializes in treating anxiety/panic attacks? Panic disorder/anxiety tends to respond pretty favorably to appropriate treatment, reducing your symptoms, and thereby reducing your need for medication to manage it except when your other tools aren't effective. 5mg twice a day is quite a lot of clonazepam for anxiety/panic disorder. However, rather than changing docs (unless you think this one is negligent or doesn't take you seriously), I would encourage you to work with your provider to find things that are helpful for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebaseball2001 Posted September 1, 2014 Author Share Posted September 1, 2014 Wooster, Thank you for the advice. I agree even if there was some lingering injury there, the point is I have anxiety and depression now so the treatment would still be the same. I always go into a relationship with a pdoc feeling doubt, thinking they are throwing darts at a dart board and I am the board. They are hoping, as I am, that something sticks. But I also have to remember these people went through extensive schooling to get where they are now. I appreciate you taking the time to write me. Chad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
olga Posted September 1, 2014 Share Posted September 1, 2014 Chad, welcome to Crazyboards. I hope you will stick around and get to know some of our members. olga Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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