MneCDB Posted October 10, 2014 Share Posted October 10, 2014 (edited) Hi, just trying this thing to see if it's going to work. The urge is really strong - right now. I'm reading the posts, trying to find something else to keep my mind off of it but nothing's working. So I'm posting this instead. No SI while I'm busy typing and I'm hoping I can make the urge go as I share this on the forum. I look at what I've done yesterday and feel guilty and shamed but want to add to it.. isn't that ironic. I'm new here but this place seems to be so supportive, I hope I can contribute to all the help I've seen from the members on here. Breathing.. Really not confident I'll make it through this evening without giving in to it.. Edited October 10, 2014 by MneCDB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WinterRosie Posted October 10, 2014 Share Posted October 10, 2014 Have you tried reading through our list of distractions? Good for you to try something else, like coming here, first! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MneCDB Posted October 10, 2014 Author Share Posted October 10, 2014 I read pages of that list. Decided to watch some tv shows. I managed to hold back for 2 hours. The tv show helped a bit.. I'll just have to be stronger next time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WinterRosie Posted October 10, 2014 Share Posted October 10, 2014 Two hours is a really long time to sit with such strong urges. You're really strong, and you're smart to keep trying to find distractions. Maybe next time you can try for 2.5 hours? Or 3? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MellyDonut Posted October 10, 2014 Share Posted October 10, 2014 Good for you foe resisting! I know it is really hard. The fact that you tried to resist is a good thing. I agree with keeping the hands busy. One thing I found that was strangely helpful when I first started to quit was instead of cutting I would take a pen and write everything that I felt about myself where I would normally cut. Sometimes it was just nasty things I felt about myself, other times it was paragraphs. For whatever reason that seemed to help me a lot, especially because in the shower it would wash off and I would be left with a new slate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MneCDB Posted October 11, 2014 Author Share Posted October 11, 2014 Thanks for the idea Melly, I'll keep that in mind. Maybe try it myself. I really like that idea of washing it off. From what I gather you successfully stopped cutting, congrats! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MneCDB Posted October 11, 2014 Author Share Posted October 11, 2014 I just counted... 125 new ones in 3 days. Fuck. I never cut that much before, when I wasn't even aware of what I was doing. I'll try these tips I see everywhere on the net, about rubber bands and ice. The only thing I can think of that's nice about all that right now is that I never ever felt the need to go deep. I don't know why I'm able to post about that here on the forum. In a very similar context earlier I was asked a question about that and I completely froze, unable to answer. Well, I'll keep communicating here as long as it's not a problem. It seems to be the only place I'm able to talk about it. And I know talking keeps me from over-indulging. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bueler Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 I'm glad you're distracting yourself... I'm not sure what else to say to distract you, nor do I really have any advice. Stay strong, you're doing well delaying it... I watch netflix a lot... sometimes I just go for a car ride, is that possible? Like, go get some chicken or just ride around and go some place peaceful, roll the windows down, play some music... you don't even have to get out of the car. I do that when I get really upset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MneCDB Posted October 22, 2014 Author Share Posted October 22, 2014 Hey, haven't been posting in a while because I was ashamed of having failed at resisting and was cutting a lot everyday.. Now I've got one day without SH! Trying to go for 2. I'll go to sleep in a few hours, if I make it I'll have 2 days done! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wooster Posted October 23, 2014 Share Posted October 23, 2014 YEAH!!! Way to go! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MneCDB Posted October 30, 2014 Author Share Posted October 30, 2014 Thanks Wooster for the encouragement! It actually made me smile to read it It's been one week now! Yay! Still have the urges but these stay for life from what I gather. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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