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sick of being terrified of job interviews


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I thought I was doing quite well in diminishing my social phobia until I played the phone message today.  And then pure terror shot through me when I heard this: "Hollywoodfreaks, I'm callling from X Employment Place.  If you are still interested in working here give us a call."  Fuck! 

And I'm pretty much deciding that I'm not going to take the interview because the job is in the morning and I'm so not a morning person it's not even funny. I've never been able to be functional in the morning and I probably never will be.  But I have to wonder if that reason is a copout because I'm fucking terrified of job interviews. 

And then I beat myself up and start to get depressed because I haven't had a job in quite a while and "beggars can't be choosers" and "I'm such a burden and a leech on my boyfriend" (although, financially speaking, I'm not a burden on him at all--and these are my own thoughts, btw).  And start droning on about how I'm going to look up richbenefactors.com when I get home because that is my only hope of surviving.  And then I start thinking it would be nice to just drive my car into the middle of a busy intersection to put myself out of my misery, hoping I accidentally get poisoned somehow, etc.  All this in spite of the fact that all the people I talked to about this don't think it would be unreasonable for me to decline the job interview.  I just feel like I'm never going to have a job again and I don't have the room to be picky like this.

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Well, I don't feel that I chickened out of the interview so it's ok.  I called the place and they want to give me an interview anyway so I'll do it.  I'm just worried that I will chicken out of shit in the future based on that reaction.  I hate letting fear control me as much as it does.

I agree, you feel better when you just go through the anxiety provoking experience no matter how bad it is.  If you chicken out a nasty depression is bound to follow.

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Hollywood:

I don't know much about phobias, but I'm great at interviews.  My advice would be to do it just to get yourself through it.  Also, if there is anything you can do to inform yourself about the company, that would be good.  Not that you need to spout your knowledge at them, but it might give YOU a little confidence to go in there feeling informed about the business without them telling you.

A lot of places have flexible hours:  maybe they could give you a time slot that you could live with.

Anyway, I always go to interviews for the experience, even if I don't really want the job. 

olga

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Hi,

Something that has helped me in the past is to go into interviews with the attitude that I'm interviewing them as much as they're interviewing me. It helps alleviate the feeling that they have all the power and you are a groveling little mouse asking for crumbs. This way you can go in with an attitude of confidence and nondefensiveness, as if you're trying to determine if this job is good enough for you.

just a thought,

G~

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Something my pdoc has offered to do for me is set up video cameras and stage a mock job interview situation and videotape it so we can go through it later and talk about what I was doing and what I said, etc. 

That seemed like a bit much to me, but rehearsing and practicing for interviews rather than going in cold definitely makes it less scary.

But then, so does leaving the computer online so they can't call you in for an interview in the first place.

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Our fearless leader is on dial up???

Oops, sorry--off-topic...

Hollywood, you might also check with your local community college.  Sometimes there's an office with counselors who can advise you on things to do with jobs, aptitude, interviews, etc. 

Just a suggestion!

olg

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  • 4 weeks later...

I have a really bad fear of public speaking and interviews. I went ahead and took 1mg klonopin before my last 3 interviews and it was like a cake walk.  The last one I got the job on the spot.  Feels good getting back into being an Oracle DBA again ;)

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