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Hi there I'm confused about myself


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Hello all.

 

I'm a male introvert in my 30s.

 

I been taken to the hospital with depression just as I entered college.

The diagnosis settled on Bipolar Mixed with intermitten explosive disorder (DSM III) back in the 90s.

 

Long story short, I'm not entirely convinced about my diagnosis for several reasons which prevents me from seeking medical help.

I not looking to be diagnosed in this forum, I just don't want to go to a pdoc just to be called weak and an overindulged coward (which has happend twice). I just want to share my feelings and get some word of wisdom.

 

Edited by FortifiedCoward
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Welcome to Crazyboards.  I'm sorry you have had the misfortune to find a couple of pdocs who were total idiots, but they are not all incompetent.  I hope someday that you will find a good one who can help you.

 

Please let us know if there is anything we can help you with.

 

olga

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Holy cats, FT, you've seen some awful doctors.

We always tell people to try not to focus too much on their diagnosis, and instead to look at whether their treatment is giving them relief of their symptoms. You don't sound like a guy whose meds are working, so maybe you could focus on changing your meds around instead of fretting too much about whether you're bipolar or not.

Welcome to CB. I hope you find what you're looking for here.

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Thanks for the welcome.

 

Yea, the symptoms are the problem, not the label. I’ll remember that.

 

I’m probably a little too obsessed with the diagnosis. To tell the truth, I still have doubts if what I went through was child abuse. It’s just that even now I avoid laying down in a certain position because it reminds me of being pinned down and spit on the face by my father. And I know that isn't normal.

 

As for the pdocs, both got the story from my parents before they spoke to me.

One didn’t even ask me what was going through my mind, and the other seemed to have his mind set as to what my problem was.

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I think you were abused.

Being pinned down and spit on is abuse.

I think that someone who would do that to crush your spirit is capable of a lot.

You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for.

Edited by Stickler
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Hello and Welcome to Crazyboards!

 

I agree that what you went through is abuse.  Mental and emotional abuse take their toll just as physical abuse does.  That's awful that your father spit on you.  Shame on him.

 

I think you'll find a lot of caring people on this site who strive to make their own, and other's, lives better.

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