Memory, Racing Thoughts, Loss of words..... HELP!

[mccaffertee]

OK, i'm reaching out to see what some of you think about my memory issues and what may have caused it and will it get better...

I will explain what is going on first.

 

I used to be quick with words, but a few years ago I noticed i am having difficulty trying to remember/learn anything new.  But if i am hands-on and spend a lot it sinks in.  Example:  If i have been around a product long enough, i learn all about it by explaining it to customers and hearing others talk.  But if i try reading on it or take any training, it just doesn't stick very well at first. 

 

I can't say when it actually started, but i noticed it a few years ago when i switched jobs and had to learn some new product.  THIS WAS / IS EMBARRASSING to say the least when i get a question.  Also, i notice i can't find certain words when trying to explain some things in general...i know that i know what i mean to say, but some words just won't come to the surface...causing a quick stammer to find the word for what i am trying to say...Then a while later, it pops into my head, needless to say, after i don't need it anymore.

 

If i had to explain it, I would say that i feel like when i am trying to write/think that all the words and phrases rush by and don't stick so i can't recall them.  My thoughts seem flash by, racing through my brain...kinda like confusion, or thinking too fast.  Its like the thoughts are there, but i can't grab them fast enough.  If i try to read up on something, its like my eyes dart all over and i don't retain much, if anything, because i seem to be thinking about something else at the same time.

 

HISTORY.  I have a long history of anxiety.  Probably a little OCD too.  Type A personality.  I experienced severe Panic Attacks in 1992 that lasted about 6 months.  I was put on anti-depressants at the time to help manage.  

 

In 1995 i switched to Paxil and a few years ago I tried to taper off to stop, but have come to believe that i am much better off staying on as i feel much better in most every way.  I also started on Ativan and Ambien.

 

I have been on Paxil 10MG, Ativan 2MG and Ambein 10MG ever since - 20 years.

 

So now that my memory/cognitive issues are affecting my daily efforts, and i have tapered down and off Ativan and Ambien completely.  I am in a very good place in life and things are going really well, so its been easy and for the first time i feel good without ativan help.  Also, have slept without any help...been about 2 weeks now.  I am NOT experiencing any anxiety and i am sleeping pretty good.

 

Trying to read up on all this is even more confusing, so i am asking for feedback, hopefully from experience.

 

REMEMBER, all these issue were present BEFORE i stopped the meds, and I am hoping these issues will go away over time.

 

So, any feedback would be welcome.  And sorry if this is not written well, but its what i am dealing with.

 

Thanks in advance!!

Edited May 28, 2015 by mccaffertee

[melissaw72]

Hi, welcome to CB!

I just wanted to say that I can relate to you about memory, racing thoughts, and the loss of words when you need it the most.  Sometimes I have to describe the word I'm trying to think of in order to get my point across.  My memory is really crappy too, and it has happened over time.  When my thoughts race, I can't even hold on to an idea, and will lose my train of thought and forget what I am doing or need to do/remember.

[crtclms]

I'm not sure what you want. You've quit the two meds that might be causing memory loss, etc. Does your pdoc know?

Anyway, as long as your pdoc knows, it looks like you figured things out for yourself.