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Why the Holidays Suck


GroovyGwen

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So I think I may have an idea as to why the holidays are so tough for me.  I think that I am a sensitive person who is affected by other people's emotions and what kind of energy they give out.  Since this is a stressful time for a whole lot of people, with the family stuff, the financial stuff, the religious stuff, the travel stuff, etc, the majority of the publec give off some kind of negative vibe.  Stressful, worrysome, whatever.  So these vibes just add to my own negative vibes and compound and grow.  Then the vibes that I give out go to someone else and compound and grow there.  IT IS A WHOLE BIG SPIRALING CHASM OF NEGATIVITY!  What the heck can we possibly to do stop this evil cycle?  Of course it would be best to just not let other people's crap affect you, but until then - I say we all just hide. 

What do we all think?

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So I think I may have an idea as to why the holidays are so tough for me.  I think that I am a sensitive person who is affected by other people's emotions and what kind of energy they give out.  Since this is a stressful time for a whole lot of people, with the family stuff, the financial stuff, the religious stuff, the travel stuff, etc, the majority of the publec give off some kind of negative vibe.  Stressful, worrysome, whatever.  So these vibes just add to my own negative vibes and compound and grow.  Then the vibes that I give out go to someone else and compound and grow there.  IT IS A WHOLE BIG SPIRALING CHASM OF NEGATIVITY!  What the heck can we possibly to do stop this evil cycle?  Of course it would be best to just not let other people's crap affect you, but until then - I say we all just hide. 

What do we all think?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

i agree with the hiding idea.  works pretty well for me!  i also try to avoid negative feelings at all costs.  it has always been a struggle but it has been working very well recently.  even when the negativity seems desperately eternal, miracles and profound changes can happen.  i hear that even positive changes don't last forever, but i choose not to believe that.  im trying not to even think about the holidays, maybe do something at the last minute for the family..

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Hey, I'm with you. Christmas can suck my ass! -- this is another thread; if you haven't already, check it out. You are not alone.

In my young adulthood, I'd worked out a fairly decent working relationship with Christmas. I lived about 1/2 hour away from my mother, as well as my grandmother. My sister, who had fled across the country and away from the family, didn't come home for Christmas. This lasted about 10 years, during which time my mother, grandmother and I kept Christmas to a very small, manageable level. Nothing big. Just a day to get together, no big stress.

Then my sister decided to come back and do Christmas with the family. No, she insisted on doing CHRISTMAS!!! It had to be BIG, it had to be all that she remembered Christmas to be. She fucking insisted on it, and my mother went along with this whole megillah, basically to have peace with her. (Suffice it to say, my sister is essentially a big bully.) It became awful. Once I moved away across state (after my grandmother died), I have hardly ever gone back, and when I have, my sister is still running this 3-ring circus of Christmas and making my mother jump through hoops. She's toned it down a bit in the past few years, but it's still too much.

Yes, my mother could just say "No" to the entire mess. She has stood up to my sister enough that she is not doing it all, is again doing it on a much smaller level. But the fucking stress of my sister, who is essentially a big 55-five-year old control-freak bully/baby, is more than I care to deal with. Frankly, she is just an asshole to be around.

So, I stay here. And gladly not do Christmas.

revlow

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I'm down for the hiding idea.

As I type this my car is parked around back, answering machine set to give the 'full' message, and I already told my mom (The only person I'd have shown up for) that I'm not showing up.

Fortunately most of the family would rather not have me there anyhow, so it's not too much of a battle. ;)

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I rented a bunch of movies. War of the Worlds was pretty good. I'm thinking of going out to the movies, what with all the Christmasy themes in theaters. Homosexuality, terrorism, complacency of the media, Geisha girls, the oil industry, Truman Capote, and Johnny Cash. (These are all excellent movies, I'm just saying it's a weird Christmas for Hollywood.)

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Jem:

LOL. Hadn't thought about it, but how true re: the weird cinematic Christmas! I used to love going to the theaters on Christmas. No crowds, just about have the theater to yourself. At least that's the way it used to be; haven't done it in awhile. Hope it hasn't changed.

Enjoy!

revlow

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