Being hopeless living on $1165 a month for the rest of my life

[carlossong]

Hey guys,

I wonder how you guys deal with the fact that you might never recover to keep a part-time job ever and

staying on disability for the rest of your life. Therefore, never being able to buy a car or something expensive.

Always relying on government assistance. Relying on other people to survive. Girls stop talking to me when I tell them I'm on disability.

Disability income is never enough to buy things I really want like a used car or a house.

I pay $450 to rent a room in my mom's house. I didn't like living alone in an apartment.

$300 for groceries per month

$50 for internet and phone

After other expenses, I can only save $150 per month. That's if I stay at home all day,

don't go to restaurants or hang out with friends to eat out or get something to drink like a smoothie.

 

A lot of times I feel hopeless. I found out the hard way that I'm not capable of college or part-time work anymore.

I help my mom with dishes and mowing the lawn when I am able. A lot of times I miss appointments.

Things became 10x more difficult when I got this mental illness over 10 years ago.

I don't believe scientists will come up with a cure anytime soon. 

[Wonderful.Cheese]

I wish I got that much in SSDI. 

Are you in therapy to deal with these issues? It seems like you are holding yourself back a lot. Negative self talk isn't easy to get rid of. You would really benefit from a good tdoc IMO. 

[Gearhead]

Have you considered doing some volunteer work with an organization you like, just to get yourself out of the house and do something interesting?

[melissaw72]

I wish I got that much in SSDI too.  Do you have a therapist or psychiatrist?  Have you talked to them about it?  If so, what do they suggest.  I agree with Cheese that therapy would be helpful if you aren't in it already.

Edited June 17, 2015 by melissaw72

[carlossong]

I went to therapy for 10 months to help me go back to school. It didn't work out.

My anxiety shoots up through the roof.

[surreal]

It makes me feel hopeless too. I actually made a blog entry recently about that.

My pdocs think I won't be able to work full-time ever again or go to college anytime soon.

Edited June 16, 2015 by surreal

[coraline]

On 6/16/2015 at 8:22 AM, carlossong said:

I went to therapy for 10 months to help me go back to school. It didn't work out.

My anxiety shoots up through ..

..

Edited October 17, 2020 by coraline

[mood_slayer]

You mention owning a home....based on SSDI income, we can get our own apartments through subsidized government housing like Section 8, and in some areas, these apartments can lead to our own home through section 8 homeownership program. And for disabled people on SSDI, it's easier for us to score housing, you just have to do a little research for your area and apply. Here's a good website to follow in case anyone's interested: 

http://affordablehousingonline.com/open-section-8-waiting-lists

[melissaw72]

You mention owning a home....based on SSDI income, we can get our own apartments through subsidized government housing like Section 8, and in some areas, these apartments can lead to our own home through section 8 homeownership program. And for disabled people on SSDI, it's easier for us to score housing, you just have to do a little research for your area and apply. Here's a good website to follow in case anyone's interested: 

http://affordablehousingonline.com/open-section-8-waiting-lists

For some reason I thought I wrote about this here ... I guess it was in another thread.  Having a section 8 voucher is great ... I have one and was the reason I could move out of my parents home.  I don't have a house, but rent an apartment and I love it.  And very affordable.  There is also housing by the housing authorities in each town.  It is a lot of paperwork but worth it if/when you get housing. 

I also have food stamps to help out with food.  I couldn't get these when I lived with my parents because they count the entire household income.  But when you are on your own they help out a lot.

[inked3]

It really is hard living on ssdi but it is possible to do.

Have you tried to find ways to cut back on what your spending each month?  It might not free up a lot of money but it all adds up.

Like already said there are programs for housing and homeownership

There are free government cell phone programs for low income individuals, the one I used was assurance wireless. It gave me 200 mins a month and unlimited texting. You could add minutes for low cost or do unlimited everything including internet for 30 a month. Personally I decided to buy a phone outright and pay 25 a month for unlimited everything with metro pc but I don't know if you have that provider around you.

It takes a lot of planning and you don't always get what you really like to eat all the time but I manage to provide 2-3 meals a day for 2 adults for a month and approximately 9 meals a month for 3 kids all for around 250 total.

Find free things to do in your area, during the warmer weather around here there are lots of free music events for example. Not always bands I really like but it gets us out of the house.

Also keep an eye out for good deals. There are a couple of used book stores near me that I can get books for under $2 and I've found 2 places that sell like new DVDs for $2. A free alternative to both of these is utilizing a library but every now and then I enjoy shopping for something I want and not just need. Flea markets can also have some awesome deals.

I get free magazine subscriptions and random free stuff from slickdeals.net it's a forum. I only go to the freebie section there. It takes a little searching but sometimes you find some good stuff.

I'm not sure how it is in other places but I find free stuff people are giving away in local Facebook groups and craigslist(sp?) now and then. Just today I got two free beanbag chairs for the kids.

Before we get paid each month I budget every penny we get. It does take some work but after a month or two it becomes easier because you can transfer the stuff that's always the same and go from there.

If you would be interested and think it might help you it would take me a little while but I could send you an example our monthly budget, not sure if it would help though being that it is a different amount and covers more people (about 1700 I think).

It does suck not just having money to do whatever you want (within reason) but with some work it can work.

I try my hardest to be thankful for what I do have and try not to focus on what I don't have, doesn't always work but I try... therapy over the years has really helped with that.

Edit: I also managed some how to make it work on $919 a month for a few years before my husband got on sddi

Edited June 17, 2015 by inked3

[ImNotDP]

You need a purpose. That might be volunteering, or becoming an activist for something you are passionate about, or simply going about your day being the best person to others as you can be, or finding a religion that speaks to you, or.... I think if you felt purposeful, it would make you feel less hopeless.

[carlossong]

You need a purpose. That might be volunteering, or becoming an activist for something you are passionate about, or simply going about your day being the best person to others as you can be, or finding a religion that speaks to you, or.... I think if you felt purposeful, it would make you feel less hopeless.

I volunteered to work with my dad. I worked 2 days per week and it got stressful enough that I had to quit. 

[carlossong]

I try my hardest to be thankful for what I do have and try not to focus on what I don't have, doesn't always work but I try... therapy over the years has really helped with that.

Edit: I also managed some how to make it work on $919 a month for a few years before my husband got on sddi

That is very positive. For fun I have the internet and video games. If I sit for too long I get lower back pain so I stand up at least once every 60 minutes.

I like reading easy things on the internet. It's summer time so I use the air conditioner a lot. However, I feel happiest and anxiety free when I stay at home.

That's why I prefer to stay at home as much as possible. Today I had to go get immunotherapy shots for my allergies but I didn't like driving 40 minutes.

The doc said I have to get shots for the next 5 years to be symptoms free so-to-speak.

I believe I am happy 60% of the time and 40% of the time I suffer from my mental illness no matter where I am. 

 

[melissaw72]

However, I feel happiest and anxiety free when I stay at home.

That's why I prefer to stay at home as much as possible.

Me too.  Also safer, more secure.

[saintalto]

Have you considered doing some volunteer work with an organization you like, just to get yourself out of the house and do something interesting?

I found this helpful, I volunteer at a museum specialising in my favourite subject. I am allowed to go as much or as little as I want, stay as little or as much as I want, and there is no solid commitment. Sometimes, when I'm well, I go multiple days a week and other times I don't go at all for many weeks at a time.

I find this little side project gives me a sense of purpose and something to look forward to when I'm well enough to go out. I also chose a quiet museum which is very sparely visited and the work is completely casual and non-stressful.

Find somewhere you would love to spend time and try and figure out an agreement for casually volunteering.