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Understanding someone with chronic pain


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It seems like hell to me. I have 2 close friends with chronic pain. Both attempted suicide because they have pain every day 10/10.

One of them says he wants to be euthanized. He doesn't know why he has to go through extreme suffering. He thinks of ending it all.

Sometimes getting out of bed is difficult for me. I don't understand why I have go through life suffering so much. Many times I wanna be euthanized.

It's a burden to my family to have them take care of me because taking a shower seems like a chore. Masturbating seems like a chore.

I am just paying $450 a month in rent and this month I already saved $50 cos I didn't go outside to have fun or anything. I already spent 16 hours in bed today

staring at the ceiling and thinking how happy I used to be when I a kid and was normal.

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Thank you for posting this.  My hubby grimaces a lot, and I used to think he was mad at me.  He hates when he can't do something, and minimizes the pain he feels.  I have cried for him, and with him.  Empathy does go a long way.

Edited by scatty
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  • 1 month later...
  • 8 months later...

i know this discussion has been going on for quite awhile and i am a bit late in the game, but....

i read that article someone posted about understanding someone with chronic pain...and i found this section particularly important

 
Recognize coping skills. When you have the flu, you probably feel miserable for a few days or weeks but do the best you can to function. Chronic pain sufferers have probably been feeling awful for a long time. They may have adopted coping mechanisms that conceal the real level of pain they feel or they may not have the strength to function normally.

I live with someone who doesnt understand the pain i go through and NOW he has severe issues with his neck and whines and complains all the time about it... I have had my pain for close to 20 yrs now.  i always tell him when you have gone through this for as long as i did you can complain about me taking meds as much as i do - see he hates having to take norco and that is the only thing i am on.  i have gone through it all - oxy, opana, fentyal, you name it.  i was so bad that i was literally falling over at work so i decided for myself that i would cut back on all of it and i do better now just on norco. even though the pain is still bad.

he takes my meds from and makes me go a couple of days without and i am miserable.  see both his sister died of a drug overdose one being from a dr that was basically a pill mill so i understand where he is coming from... but i just cant get him to understand the everyday pain and emotional (at this point) pain i go through.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Low Income and Severe, chronic .... unrelenting pain ... so bad, U only sleep when exhausted ... U may not even be able to sit ... U may have to stand ... neuropathy can affect the entire spine, subsequently driving pain down into the fingers toes and every muscle .... The pain is hellish ... and constant. Even with the prescribed pain meds, do not expect to be pain free. Learn to live with it; get disciplined.  But, if U can attain even a 70 to 80 percent relief, that's a miracle, IMO. Taking too much is just as bad ... even worse ... than taking too little; tolerance leads to ever increasing needs. That is NOT a solution. Learn to accept, to tolerate, a bit of pain and discomfort. And U may be able to return to a normal standard of life.

Pharma Companies have PATIENT ASSISTANCE programs. Purdue Pharmaceutical was ...WONDERFUL; they supplied me with free OxyContin for over 1 year; I only had to send in a monthly script ... BUT if I did not express mail it, it seemed to take a few weeks to get through their mailroom. U can track express mail ... not the regular mail.  The drawback: the $20 Express Mail monthly fee.

IF U have any insurance coverage, Purdue may not offer their assistance.

Still, U first need an Md who will write the scripts; if so, expect follow-up appointments every 2 to 4 weeks; and frequent urine tests.

Oxy often hits the news ... users abuse it. No. Addicts abuse it; I would NEVER even consider NOT following my Mds specific dosage instructions. U need absolute compliance, period. If U cannot do this, then forget pursuing this process. Still, it's a long process. IMO, Mds have their own standards for prescribing pain meds; it may take some time. Plus, many will no longer do this. ASK..ASK..ASK before making an appointment. This is a highly regulated drug (all pain meds are) ... and the standards were tightened in late 2014 ... I believe that many Pain Mgmt Mds will NO LONGER write scripts for MOST / or ANY ... pain meds. (This is just my opinion). I hope this helps at least a few people out there.

 

 

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I actually hate the way oxycontin makes me feel, I don't like the "high" at all. I had to take it for 6 weeks, several times a day, because I had a knee replacement. I dreaded taking it, but it did help with pain.

It made me really wonder how Rush Limbaugh was able to function at all. It's definitely the strongest pain medication I've taken, unless Percocet is in the same class. I tolerated Percocet very well. But I couldn't really function on either of them.

When I was evaluated a few weeks after the surgery, when I was still on meds, they decided I was too out of to have my bandage removed. I don't understand why, but that is what I was told.

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On 4/9/2016 at 10:39 AM, urbaneve said:

he takes my meds from and makes me go a couple of days without and i am miserable.  see both his sister died of a drug overdose one being from a dr that was basically a pill mill so i understand where he is coming from... but i just cant get him to understand the everyday pain and emotional (at this point) pain i go through.

Is this still happening?

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Is it that people keep unused pills around or are the patients abusing them?  I read about some kid that was stealing a parents pain meds and when that ran out bought them on the black market and when that got too expensive he turned to Heroin.  

I think my doctor is right on about the controlled substances.  We had the read the rules paper and sign it.   It was basically we are not screwing around here.  Take them as prescribed and you get frequent visits to check in and if they are pain meds get you off them asap or investigate fully what it is that causes the long term pain.  She had a similar thing with Benzos but I was taking them PRN and was doing a regular on line journal thing for depression and anxiety (Which I should probably do again) jotting down even a little stuff sure makes a tdoc visit a more productive activity (I think)

And my heart goes out to you that have 10 level pain.  I had that for only like a week and nothing they could inject into me did much of anything.  When you look up Agony in the dictionary its heavy bleeding in the gut.   WHY does that hurt so much more then things like broken bones or whatever?

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Soft tissue is harder to repair than bones. For example, orthopedists have told me it is worse to pop a ligament than to break a bone, except in extreme cases. Ligaments and tendons don't really heal easily, or sometimes at all.

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  • 4 weeks later...
On 5/3/2016 at 4:06 PM, crtclms said:

Soft tissue is harder to repair than bones. For example, orthopedists have told me it is worse to pop a ligament than to break a bone, except in extreme cases. Ligaments and tendons don't really heal easily, or sometimes at all.

I agree with this, but there are also times when the bones don't heal either. 

After my hip broke and the DRs tried to fix it through surgery, the 2 bones never fused together even though they had been attached together with hardware.  Found myself approx a year later having another hip surgery to take out the hardware from the first surgery and replace it with different hardware to get the bones to fuse another way.  Didn't work again.  The bones still hadn't fused.  When they realized that after 6-8 months, they did a total hip replacement because there was no other way to fuse the bones.  So my bones never fused, and I had to have a hip replacement because of it.

 

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I have had chronic pain since returning from afghan with burns and a screws up neck and back and most of the bones and teeth were broken or knocked out 

pain is just the deal

oxycotin gives me no high ..... It enables me to get out of bed and attempt to stretch out the skin

most of. The time my husband has to assist me getting out of bed

BUT I work full time in a physical job ....... I have to

i am monitored all of the time at my job and with my dr noncompliance in either direction is cause for termination 

it has also been sent for review my the board 

pain sucks and it's real 

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