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Severe Insomnia and Morning Rage


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So since my doctor took me off my medication (800mg of Seroquel + Depokote) cold-turkey in February(which I've reported him for malpractice with the NHS but its taking ages). I've had severe insomnia, the most sleep that I was able to get since that period, was 4 hours every night after a depressed episode during spring time but it didn't last. Recently I went back to almost none and out of surprise my pdoc let me have some ambien for a week which usually lets me have 3-5 hours of sleep. My sleep usually gets that bad.. that last month I left the house and my eyes were playing tricks on me and I thought people were zombies, and when I went closer they would turn to humans again, I would always ask for help and get none and I'm tired of begging that I just shut up now.

Plus there is no such thing as morning or night to me anymore.

My other problem is when I wake up whenever I get a bit of sleep, I wake up and I go on rage mode. I am so irritable but only when I wake up, I've punched a hole through my door( I had to buy a new one). I smashed my mirror, I punch things, I hit things with my head. 

I only have a week's prescription of ambien, and then my doctor said I'm on my own, he wants to give me an anti-depressant for sleep but I told him I can't take it because he took me off Depokote, then he says I don't have bipolar. He is wrong because he tried to diagnose me with BPD and I went to a specialist which he advised me to go and she is 100% absolutely sure I do not have BPD or any personality disorder for that matter. He still refuses to give me my medication because he thinks I do not suffer from a mental disorder when I had many manic episodes with psychosis in the past including one in February which I got run over twice by traffic because I thought I was immortal. My advocate is taking absolute ages  with the second opinion doctor and I'm just left in middle of this shit. I've been so desperate for my medication that I went to ask drug dealers asking for Seroquel ...that bad.

Any suggestions for now?

Edited by StJimmy9151
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I'm sorry you are going through this.

I would call your advocate like every day until you can get in to see another DR.  I'd bother the crap out him/her until s/he did something more than they are doing now.

Also, he says you don't have a MI ... then why would you be there if there was nothing wrong?

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