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I'm on my way into a deep, deep depression. I can feel it in my body. I feel heavy and yet floating away. Anxiety comes at night and whenever it feels like it. Xanax just makes me feel drugged, but the depression is still there. I don't feel like doing anything. I cut all the time to get rid of the anxiety. Local psych ward is full. Doctor doesn't know what to do. I get the odd manic short rush in spite of Lithium.

I'm already on too many medications, but I really need something to help me. Now. I can't really up my doses as I'm already on pretty high doses of everything. I'm totally out of ideas.

Help, anyone?

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I'm on my way into a deep, deep depression. I can feel it in my body. I feel heavy and yet floating away. Anxiety comes at night and whenever it feels like it. Xanax just makes me feel drugged, but the depression is still there. I don't feel like doing anything. I cut all the time to get rid of the anxiety. Local psych ward is full. Doctor doesn't know what to do. I get the odd manic short rush in spite of Lithium.
Go to the ER, do not pass go. Once you are in the custody of the hospital, you are their responsibility whether the psych floor(s) are full or not.

In PA ability to pay is an illegal reason to turn someone away at the ER. Call crisis. Do something today. Don't wait for us, even though you may get a ton of good answers it sounds to me like you need immediate professional care. As in, hospital. MAKE them pay attention to you.

Stay close with us and let us know what you decide to do.

I'll be having good thoughts.

Hugs,

Suze

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I'm on my way into a deep, deep depression. I can feel it in my body. I feel heavy and yet floating away. Anxiety comes at night and whenever it feels like it. Xanax just makes me feel drugged, but the depression is still there. I don't feel like doing anything. I cut all the time to get rid of the anxiety. Local psych ward is full. Doctor doesn't know what to do. I get the odd manic short rush in spite of Lithium.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Isn't Karolinska University Hospital a teaching facility? Maybe they have available

facilities or could make available under the circumstances?

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ditto what henry rollins said up there. get thee to a hospital. really.

i have MDD and am on effexor and seroquel. i don't feel that the effexor is useful at all, but the seroquel as an adjunct is what is keeping me alive pretty much. it greatly reduces my obsessive thougths. and reduces my anxiety. and reduces my depression.

but i have no idea what it would do for you. and regardless, this is not the time for you to be looking for new meds. you have to get solid care immediately. and that means hospital care. not seeking a quick acting wonder drug. i KNOW why you want one. believe me. i KNOW what you want and why you want it. and in a while, when this crisis has passed, you can look to medical therapy adjustments. but right now you need hospital care. people with you and watching you, caring for you. okay?

this is important. go to hospital.

grouse.

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Helena:

I'm in the U.S., and I don't know the Swedish health care system personally. However, my stepmother is Swedish; she and my father spend part of every year there. I know enough to understand that the system in Sweden is not as easy to navigate as outsiders might think. (For anyone interested, here's an abstract that gives a taste of what it is: The Swedish mental health system. Past, present, and future.)

Please tell us, what are your options? Can you go to the emergency room? Is Karolinska University Hospital a place where you can get help? I sincerely hope so, and that it isn't more complicated than that. But if it is, please give us any ideas you can think of, any options you may have, and we'll help you sort through them.

Your concerned friend,

revlow

PS - In the meantime, if you get the urge to cut, please grab a piece of paper, a pen, pencil, crayon, eyeliner...anything you can grab...and get it out on paper and not on yourself. Write, scribble, whatever...just get it out. (Many years ago, I provided art therapy at a psych hopital; this method helped several woman who were cutters, to channel that urge onto paper rather than onto themselves.)

Just a suggestion. I am not a med professional.

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Please tell us, what are your options? Can you go to the emergency room?
Go to an ER or whatever the equivelent is in Sweden, if that's where you are and chain yourself to the door, if need be. A person in such dire straits should not, and I don't think ethically can be denied care. If you feel like a totally wingnut being so aggressive getting help, that's good.

Suze (the future Mrs. Henry Rollins, the artist formerly known as honkingbird--grouse...:-)

See, Helena, get better so you can have fun with us! It ain't all bad. Even when we feel lower than whale shit.

Go, go, go, gadget.

Hugs,

Suze

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Just re-read my last post. Helena: Want to make sure you know I was agreeing with everyone -- yes, get yourself to an ER or Crisis Team. Also just wanted to say, please talk to us if it's somehow more complicated than that. But, of course, ER/Crisis Team = first choice.

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Thanks for all the replies ;)

Unfortunately I belong to a certain psych ward and I can't really go anywhere else. The healthcare system sucks here, except that it's really cheap to get meds here.

I'm on Xanax now so I'm feel like I'm in my own little word..

Anyways, my doctor added 20 mgs of Zyprexa to my already huge cocktail. I took the first one yesterday and I'm drugged up on Xanax so I can't really tell a difference. My mind is quieter than usually, though. I'm a bit concerned about Zyprexa side effects. I used to have an eating disorder, and if I gain weight I might slip into old habits again.

If things get worse I'm going to the nearest hospital, definately.

Again, thank you all for your support.

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Helena, I just want to throw out a big hug to you dear.  Please do whatever it takes to get better.  We need you here and you are a big inspiration to all of us.  You are stronger than you think.  Please take care dear .  Hug hug hug!  Kris

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Sorry you're feeling so bad, hon.  I don't know if this will help you, but a sudden burst of exercise really helps me when I start really feeling rotten.  I'm talking about going for a jog or walking up and down stairs.  I also try to get as much exposure to light as possible.  Something that could have a quick positive effect on your mood might be fish oil--it helps me but it might not help everyone.

Anyway, please talk to somebody!  And let us know how you're doing.

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Just wanted to update everyone. They FINALLY got a free bed at my local psych ward the first of january. So I've been there until yesterday. They did a LOT of cleaning and upping and downing in my huge cocktail, I'm now on three meds and I feel sooo much better. You all were right as usual ;) Hospital was the way to go.

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