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Should I changed pdoc since it's been 1 year and I am unstable?


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Hi guys,

I still have days when cry and feel how difficult it is to live with mental pain. I have suicidal ideations daily.

Sometimes, I feel that I won't make it to my 40's meaning if these suicidal thoughts keep bugging me I might as well drink the hemlock.
Obviosly my mom and sister will be shocked if I did that. 

I believe what I'm going through is similar to patients with Bipolar 1 on a daily basis.

U don't know how many people hate their lives. When they go outside they hide that with a face mask so-to-speak.

 

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Before you go and change pdocs, maybe you can talk to your pdoc about how it has been a year and you still feel unstable.  He might think you are doing better/same.  So if you both talk about it and know what each others thoughts are, then maybe you can go from there.  You'll both be thinking on the same page and maybe that will help.

IMO it isn't worth changing to a new pdoc and starting all over again from the start until you and he have sorted out things.

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Definitely with melissa on this one.

It's important to work with your doc over time to make sure they know what's going on with you.

If you feel disrespected or like they are practicing unsafely, that's a different issue than you continue to have symptoms.

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I feel very similar lately. I can relate to the mask wearing feeling and the instability.

But I have to agree with woo and Melissa. If your pdoc doesn't know about your frustration and constant suicidal thoughts, then a good discussion about how you really feel is in order.

I'm being a hypocrite here big time. I need to do something regarding my pdoc as well. It's not easy.  

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4 hours ago, melissaw72 said:

Before you go and change pdocs, maybe you can talk to your pdoc about how it has been a year and you still feel unstable.  He might think you are doing better/same.  So if you both talk about it and know what each others thoughts are, then maybe you can go from there.  You'll both be thinking on the same page and maybe that will help.

IMO it isn't worth changing to a new pdoc and starting all over again from the start until you and he have sorted out things.

I agree with this. If you don't tell your doc everything they can't possibly know what's going on. Observing you isn't enough, they have to go on what they are seeing and hearing alone and if you are unwell, but well enough to hide it, then it's not something you can expect them to pick up on. Especially if you are good at putting on a mask.

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