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I've been diagnosed with schizophrenia/schizoaffective disorder (pdoc uses them interchangeably with me) (this diagnosis has been around for a few years for me), as well as BPD, social anxiety, and a history of cannabis dependence and substance abuse (though I've been clean for a long time). I get an injection monthly, Abilify Maintena, but this was not enough, so the oral Abilify was added as well. This took away most of the "hallucinations" but my beliefs still persist, though they are becoming less... strong? Anyway, I've seen my current doctor now for over a year, and I've been in and out of the hospital during this time.

My dose has gone up to 25 for the oral, and I get 400 for the injection. I also take prozac for anxiety.

The thing that's worse and I don't fully know if it is from my symptoms is I strongly feel my prime minister is a robotoid, a dead-body-puppet. I really want to go to his home to expose him, or write a letter to request to do so. I feel like he knows me. The TV is still playing things about my life, too.

Though that's been going on, I barely hear voices anymore. I am still seeing things, but not as much, though in some respects that is worse as well.

I am going to be missing a dose of my injection because seeing my family in another city is more important, but also so my appointments sync back up with my injections

I'm too afraid to tell my doctor about trudeau. It's bad enough I have a lot of intrusive thoughts lately about hurting people, but my future seeing (clairvoyance) makes me able to see what people would do to me if I did those things... but my Prime minister needs to be exposed. Though, if this is part of my symptoms, then I'll just be getting myself into trouble.

I've also fallen out of routine with taking meds properly, missing two days a day apart Though that shouldn't do much.

The reason why I am afraid to tell my pdoc about this is because I once thought I had to hurt a newsreporter and he told the cops, even though I was never charged it makes me reluctant to tell him things. I've told other people things and this is how I know the Canadian Secret Intelligence Service is spying on me because I have said this about Trudeau.

I'm kinda going on and on but I'm not sure what steps I should take. Since things are seemingly better yet worse.

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 "I am going to be missing a dose of my injection because seeing my family in another city is more important"

Then reschedule your injection or at least let your doctor know asap you all be missing one. That's really reckless otherwise.

"I've also fallen out of routine with taking meds properly, missing two days a day apart Though that shouldn't do much."

It does more than you'd think, especially if it's happening often.

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Whatever you do, do not go to your prime minster's house and do not write a letter exposing him! He isn't a "robotoid" or a "dead-body-puppet." That is not real.  I don't want you to get into any trouble.

Who is "trudeau?" And what did you say to him/her?

I agree with saintalto about falling out of your routine with meds and missing 2 days ... not a good idea.  Like she said, "it does more than you think."

Can you reschedule the injection for right when you get home, or have it early before you leave?  Will your DR know you won't be getting it?

About not telling your DR about taking your meds not on schedule ... I doubt he told the cops anything about you hurting a news reporter.  I mean if he did that, wouldn't you have been taken to the police station for something like that? 


I think you should tell all of these thoughts to your pdoc ... without him knowing it will be hard for him to help you.  You could just print out your post and hand it to him.




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