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Where to turn when no one seems to understand?

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I have been having some mild symptoms (delusions of reference, loose associations). The thing is, I am not sure if maybe I am right. Like, my family does talk about me, my sister admitted it. Now, I started working and I think some of my co-workers are acting differently towards me. They are nice, excessively nice. It feels like they are up to something. Maybe something good, but I am not in on it.

Anyways, I am not sure where to turn. The support group I usually go to is on Thursdays so they didn't meet this week or next. And, I worry about confidentiality there, now, too.

I tried a warm-line (non-crisis line) and it didn't help.

I can't explain it to most people, they won't understand.

I don't see my tdoc until after the New Year.

I did message someone on facebook who did understand and didn't have any great advice,maybe there is none, but was encouraging that it will pass and try to just concentrate on the work.

My work doesn't want us to post anything that could harm their reputation. I work as a peer mentor in the mental health field.I am really confused about what is acceptable and that cuts off a lot of areas. I am not sure what I can tweet, scope, blog. (I feel okay blogging here).



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Is this something severe enough to bring up to your doctor? I honestly haven't had experience with delusions (to my knowledge), so I'm not sure when to panic. Either way, I'm glad you feel comfortable here! I wish I could be more helpful, but all I can say is to hit me up if you want someone non-judgmental to talk with. I don't bite! :)

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57 minutes ago, confused said:

thanks. No, I don't think I need to contact pdoc yet. I get more distressed that I don't know what to do than with the symptoms.

I can certainly understand that! I'm the anxiety attack queen, so I'm constantly hiding places at work where I can hyperventilate. There's nothing to do but ride it out most of the time. It sounds like you're at that point, so get lots of sleep, go slow, and try not to ask too much of yourself while you ride this one out?

Another thought: Maybe you could exchange numbers with a couple people you know a bit better in your support group on Thursday? Perhaps the group setting is not as helpful right now, and you could do better one-on-one with someone you can relate to.

Also, maybe you got the wrong person on the warm-up line! You would get a different person every time, right?

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Just now, confused said:

Thanks, those are great ideas. I am friends with the moderator but I don't want to wear him out. I can ask him if he has an idea of where to turn, though.

Great idea! It could be like a phone buddy system even. Then you know who you're getting on the line. :) 

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I am too embarrassed to ask them straight up if something is up. 

I guess I could throw it out here if it is plausible. I do get caught up in that nothing is unbelievable.

i have a lot of anxiety and don't trust myself as much as others trust me.

My boss and another co worker keep complimenting me. Like, way too much. I don't know if they do it to everyone. I don't notice.

i think they may be trying to boost my confidence, but it is backfiring because it makes me suspicious.

i don't do well when things are planned about me without including me.

so, it seems to me  either it is some mild symptoms or they are doing something purposely


there are times when I have felt like people were talking/watching me and they really were.


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I just recently learned to just turn to myself and only myself, because no one else gives a hoot.

My brother kind of "claims" to care, but it's all just a show.

He sent me a Christmas card and a check for $200. Naturally, I ripped them to shreds.

Ahhhh....that felt soooo good.

It put a big smile on my face.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I wish I could help. Its hard to find the words sometimes. It sounds like your caught up in the fabric of the social order of things. I think its ok to say that if you are only having mild references then you can still pull out of what ever your starting to sift into. Perception is a tricky thing, but i think that it is good you are seeing patterns. Or at least have reasons for why people might be doing things true or not. The unknown must be cast off as something abstract, you must practice detachment and be hooked only to yourself, not your fellow man. Only then can you drop a line into chaos and fish your way out.

This is my composition. Hope it can help. =)

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