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Triggered Rage Please Advise


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In another forum that I frequent I have read in on several personal accounts that have “triggered” such anger and rage that I haven’t been able to contain it.   I felt like I had a tornado inside of me and I pretty much tore up my room the other night.  I wanted to rip somebody’s fucking head off their Goddamn body and jam it down their neck is what I wanted to do. (I took my meds. but didn’t sleep for 2 nights in a row but got back to normal after that) I’m concerned about this triggered rage I am experiencing with regard to its effect on my BP. (It doesn’t happen every time.)   I don’t want to quit this other forum.  I have done a lot of work both in individual and group therapy on this other issue and still have work to do on it.  I feel like I can change things just by the way I process personal stories.  I can rock it back some by not looking at the intensity of it all at once.  By stepping back, logging out and giving myself time to absorb what I have read and time to deal with it instead of taking it all in at once (head-on).  Not looking directly at the fire instead looking at it peripherally if you will and hopefully not experiencing the rage or at least the extent of the rage.

            Is the risk of triggering a full-blown BP episode by this occasional rage trigger too high to chance?  I know that it is ultimately my call, but I would really like some input.  Thanks

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Do you mean another forum on CB?

Personally I think that reading the other forum is not a good idea right now, because it seems to be really triggering to you.  I wouldn't take the chance.  Maybe try going back in a month or so to see how you feel after reading (whatever is posted there) would be a better idea, IMO.  Do you know what the actual trigger is in the other forum?

Do you see a tdoc and/or a pdoc who you are talking to about this?  I think that would be a good idea.  Maybe get a med tweak?

 

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I agree with Mel. If you already know that rubbing dirt in your eye hurts, why would you rub dirt in your eye a second (third, fourth) time? If you're worried about what you might be triggering, and you know something is a trigger for you, stay away from it until you're in a better condition to cope.

 

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Thanks for your input -- I have backed away from this other forum as you both have advised.  I know it was the best thing to do.  I guess I might as well go ahead and tell you -- before I finally backed away from it the rage was under control, but it had manifested itself in overeating and the next step I knew was bulimia which I suffered from for 17 years so when I finally realized what was going on I said OMG I am so insane what am I doing?  I couldn't get out of there fast enough.  So thanks for telling me what I should have known anyway -- sometimes I seem to have to put my head through the wall before I accept the truth.  Sorry.

Edited by nmk1226
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If it's not too weird/awkward, have you considered maybe asking one of the mods on the forum to give you a temporary "time out"? Like a probation, so you can't access the forum for a while? Maybe a month or so. An understanding mod may oblige.

If you can't actually log in or post, then maybe the temptation to go back even though you know it's a bad idea won't be as strong.

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3 hours ago, nmk1226 said:

Thanks for your input -- I have backed away from this other forum as you both have advised.  I know it was the best thing to do.  I guess I might as well go ahead and tell you -- before I finally backed away from it the rage was under control, but it had manifested itself in overeating and the next step I knew was bulimia which I suffered from for 17 years so when I finally realized what was going on I said OMG I am so insane what am I doing?  I couldn't get out of there fast enough.  So thanks for telling me what I should have known anyway -- sometimes I seem to have to put my head through the wall before I accept the truth.  Sorry.

No need to be sorry!  I'm glad you have taken steps to help control the rage.

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