Off or tried to go off? Did you find..

[Ruins]

I tried to go off (Librium 4x25mg for a couple years and prior to that Xanax, Ativan, Klonopin) bentos pretty rapidly because my memory is really bad and from the appointment to the door at home, I forgot what my doctor said - completely rearranged it in my brain. I tapered a pill a week in four weeks. I felt sick throughout but I had already been sick so I attributed it to that. At week 2, I was not feeling anxious so I thought I was great and then the avalanche of withdrawal came. I didn't really realize it when it was happening. I was super sick (this isn't about withdrawal) and I knew something was really wrong but I couldn't figure it out.

 

Finally after going off completely with my world inside out, I realized that I had been going through withdrawals. I went right back on them like it never happened and waiting to chew out my PNP (she's a leftover from when I didn't have insurance and I just don't have the head space for a new pdoc). I have my appointment and she tells me that I was super wrong and those weren't her instructions. That led to me being freaked because I never figured I'd get addicted to anything. I read the horror stories here. I knew that I needed a slow taper. Unfortunately, she wants a faster taper and I don't have a leg to stand on..or a backup. I want off. I'm willing to endure pain if I have to but it's ugly.

 

That is the backstory. My point is to ask if you ever tried to go off bentos or are off bentos, did you happen to notice if it masked underlaying medical issues? I've been on the benzos for so long, I don't know what to believe. About a year ago, I started getting peripheral neuropathy; it was slight but I couldn't look into it because of the lack of insurance. Now that I'm back to tapering, the neuropathy (the pain part) is worse.  Curled in a ball on the couch worse. On top of that, I have GI issues. I started having GI issues while I was on the bentos years go. Going off? Again, worse. I've been having cognitive issues for the last 16 months. I found out I had hypothyroidism. I stilll have cognitive issues and the doctors keep telling me my levels are wrong. I argue with them because I know something is wrong with me and it only started prior to the hypothyroid issues. But, now that I'm paying attention, is that too because of the bentos and it was just because I've been on them so long and they are only now coming out? Before the neuropathy, I had what I thought was dystonia in my left foot - horrible foot spasms and foot cramps but all tolerable if not super aggravating. All in the time frame of the bentos. Did I really have dystonia? Lastly, I used to smoke. A couple of years prior to quitting (7 years in September), I got diagnosed with asthma. Once i quit, the asthma went away. Ever since the first taper, I've felt like someone has been stepping on my chest and it's harder to breath.  This taper it's the same except it's more like a gasping for breath feeling. Did it ever go away?

 

I don't know what to think and would really like to hear if any of you had heard of this. I do realize that some of the things that are wrong with me could be attributed to just taking the benzos longterm but it just comes off as weird that up until about two years ago, physically, my health was under control. I don't really feel like I have anyone who truly knows to talk about with this. None of my doctors can look at this big picture.

[crtclms]

It often takes months to taper off benzos properly. 1mg may not sound like a lot, but you have been on it a couple of years, so a slow taper is necessary.

I'm on 2mg of Xanax (which *is* supposed to be harder, but still), and it is probably going to take me months to get off of it. I've been on it 11 years. I am really struggling, even though I am alternating .75 and .50 at night (1mg AM still). I wake up early, full of anxiety. But in the last few days, I may be able to move down to .5 every night. But it has taken me 6 weeks at this dosage, and having learned my lesson, I am planning to spend quite a while at each lowered dose.

Benzos are supposed to be good for some other medical conditions, but I can't think of one right now. Maybe IBS?

You might want to do a little research on tapering methods; you'll most likely find you tapered too fast. Try to find something reputable (an article, preferably peer-reviewed, but if it comes from a medical site, that is probably good enough.

Good luck. This has been much harder than I expected, but Xanax is difficult.

[Ruins]

20 hours ago, crtclms said:

 

 

It often takes months to taper off benzos properly. 1mg may not sound like a lot, but you have been on it a couple of years, so a slow taper is necessary.

I'm on 2mg of Xanax (which *is* supposed to be harder, but still), and it is probably going to take me months to get off of it. I've been on it 11 years. I am really struggling, even though I am alternating .75 and .50 at night (1mg AM still). I wake up early, full of anxiety. But in the last few days, I may be able to move down to .5 every night. But it has taken me 6 weeks at this dosage, and having learned my lesson, I am planning to spend quite a while at each lowered dose.

Benzos are supposed to be good for some other medical conditions, but I can't think of one right now. Maybe IBS?

You might want to do a little research on tapering methods; you'll most likely find you tapered too fast. Try to find something reputable (an article, preferably peer-reviewed, but if it comes from a medical site, that is probably good enough.

Good luck. This has been much harder than I expected, but Xanax is difficult.

 

 

 

Thanks for replying. I appreciate the time.

 

Hope your taper goes well.

[Sloane]

On 4/28/2016 at 9:45 PM, Ruins said:

I tried to go off (Librium 4x25mg for a couple years and prior to that Xanax, Ativan, Klonopin) bentos pretty rapidly because my memory is really bad and from the appointment to the door at home, I forgot what my doctor said - completely rearranged it in my brain. I tapered a pill a week in four weeks. I felt sick throughout but I had already been sick so I attributed it to that. At week 2, I was not feeling anxious so I thought I was great and then the avalanche of withdrawal came. I didn't really realize it when it was happening. I was super sick (this isn't about withdrawal) and I knew something was really wrong but I couldn't figure it out.

Finally after going off completely with my world inside out, I realized that I had been going through withdrawals. I went right back on them like it never happened and waiting to chew out my PNP (she's a leftover from when I didn't have insurance and I just don't have the head space for a new pdoc). I have my appointment and she tells me that I was super wrong and those weren't her instructions. That led to me being freaked because I never figured I'd get addicted to anything. I read the horror stories here. I knew that I needed a slow taper. Unfortunately, she wants a faster taper and I don't have a leg to stand on..or a backup. I want off. I'm willing to endure pain if I have to but it's ugly.

Ruins, took me over a year to come off Clonazepam when I realized I was chemically dependent (addiction and chemical dependency are different, it helps to understand the difference) to Clonazepam.

I started out at 2MG 3x daily with a .5MG PRN. I actually kicked the PRN dosage out completely to start with, and then worked my MG x a day down, then timed what I used throughout the day at smaller dosages. At the very end I was on .5MG once at night only. Coming off this dosage was the hardest and took the longest (7-8 months) because I basically only took this dosage to not go into withdrawal. That being said, my withdrawal symptoms throughout the day would be manageable until about 8PM when it was time to take that .5MG dosage. I tried to just quit the .5MG cold turkey but it was pure hell; sweats, body aches, migraines, seizures (but FWIW I'm prone to them), mixed moods, akathisia, you name it. I eventually started cutting the .5MG pill in half, then .25 in half, alongside adding Congentin to help my akathisia. 

Quote

That is the backstory. My point is to ask if you ever tried to go off bentos or are off bentos, did you happen to notice if it masked underlaying medical issues? I've been on the benzos for so long, I don't know what to believe. About a year ago, I started getting peripheral neuropathy; it was slight but I couldn't look into it because of the lack of insurance. Now that I'm back to tapering, the neuropathy (the pain part) is worse.  Curled in a ball on the couch worse. On top of that, I have GI issues. I started having GI issues while I was on the bentos years go. Going off? Again, worse. I've been having cognitive issues for the last 16 months. I found out I had hypothyroidism. I stilll have cognitive issues and the doctors keep telling me my levels are wrong. I argue with them because I know something is wrong with me and it only started prior to the hypothyroid issues. But, now that I'm paying attention, is that too because of the bentos and it was just because I've been on them so long and they are only now coming out? Before the neuropathy, I had what I thought was dystonia in my left foot - horrible foot spasms and foot cramps but all tolerable if not super aggravating. All in the time frame of the bentos. Did I really have dystonia? Lastly, I used to smoke. A couple of years prior to quitting (7 years in September), I got diagnosed with asthma. Once i quit, the asthma went away. Ever since the first taper, I've felt like someone has been stepping on my chest and it's harder to breath.  This taper it's the same except it's more like a gasping for breath feeling. Did it ever go away?

To answer your question, yes and no. I thought my seizures I had were because of the issues I dealt with Clonazepam only, but it wasn't that Clonazepam caused them - they just screwed with my already low threshold of a seizure disorder. I will say while I was on Clonazepam (along with Geodon and the never ending cycle of Antidepressants) I had A LOT of GI issues. Like 2 colonoscopies and a trial of the 'Gluten Free' diet kind of issues. However, I've also had GI issues since a child, and can not say if the medications caused or exasperated any of those issues. 

The cognitive issues however.... coming off Clonazepam (and an entire year after) I had very bad cognitive issues. The main Issue I had was an intense brain fog, having trouble connecting with my environment (dissociation issues), and I couldn't concentrate to save my life. I do think there was the combination of my own Social Anxiety Disorder on top of the fact my brain no longer had a chemical that it's had for 6 years.

Concerning the asthma, it very well could have been caused by the smoking. Your chest hurting may have more to do with anxiety and the physical agitation from withdrawal instead of it being directed to a physical cause. It would be a good idea though to see your doctor and get it checked out. 

Do you know what akathisia is? It's a common symptom in medication, alcohol, and drug withdrawals and can cause all kinds of physical symptoms. The dystonia, neuropothy, and spasms you refer to may or may not be caused by a Benzo itself or Benzo withdrawal. It would be a good idea to seek out a Neurologist for confirmation.

Quote

I don't know what to think and would really like to hear if any of you had heard of this. I do realize that some of the things that are wrong with me could be attributed to just taking the benzos longterm but it just comes off as weird that up until about two years ago, physically, my health was under control. I don't really feel like I have anyone who truly knows to talk about with this. None of my doctors can look at this big picture.

Coming off, and being off, Clonazepam caused a lot of physical and mental side-affects; especially the first year off of it. Understand you have been giving your brain a specific substance for years, and now that it doesn't have it anymore it has to learn to compensate for the "loss". The good news is that the brain has the natural capability to do so, it just takes a lot of time. And you also have to understand that brain meds don't just effect the brain and how you act/feel/think, but they effect your entire body. So your body has to adjust to what your brain is doing.

[philosophin]

Haven't read the rest of the responses yet, but according to my pdoc, yes, long-term use of benzos can result in cognitive dysfunction.

She plans to take me off Xanax at some point and I'm scared.  Not so much at the potential withdrawal issues, just wondering if I can deal with my anxiety without benzos because I've been relying on them for many years.

[crtclms]

I'm trying to get off Xanax right now, because I felt like it was time to move on to another anxiety med (i.e., the Xanax isn't working as well). It has been really hard. I am actually going back up .25mg because I think I need a few more weeks at that dosage. My pnurse is pretty supportive, but I'm unhappy that at my next appointment, I might actually be on more than last I saw him. But I've been on it 10 years, and that is supposed to make it much harder.

[melissaw72]

On 4/28/2016 at 0:11 AM, crtclms said:

Benzos are supposed to be good for some other medical conditions, but I can't think of one right now. Maybe IBS?

 

Good luck. This has been much harder than I expected, but Xanax is difficult.

I've been on benzos since 1995 and they haven't helped the IBS.  Maybe others have had a better experience.

Just wanted to add that tapering klonopin is also difficult.  That one was harder than any other med I've had to taper off.