OliverB Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 I hate everything, EVERYTHING. I want to destroy everything in this World. Even the things that talk tell me to do it "Kill them all". Don't know what to do. I don't like living... Destroy or die. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissaw72 Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 I'm sorry you feel this way. Have you talked with your pdoc/tdoc? *wasn't sure which one or both you had. I hope you feel better as time goes on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OliverB Posted May 27, 2016 Author Share Posted May 27, 2016 I can't tell him this. He will think I need meds. while I need a safe place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissaw72 Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 12 hours ago, Bixo said: I hate everything, EVERYTHING. I want to destroy everything in this World. Even the things that talk tell me to do it "Kill them all". Don't know what to do. I don't like living... Destroy or die. Being on meds would probably help your thoughts like you "wanting to destroy everything in this world. Even the things that talk tell me to do it "Kill them all" to not think those things anymore? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OliverB Posted May 27, 2016 Author Share Posted May 27, 2016 Meds don't help me... last time I took them I got suicidal urges and good things went away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jt07 Posted May 27, 2016 Share Posted May 27, 2016 I think you just haven't found the right meds. I also think some of the "good things" that went away might have been part of your illness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissaw72 Posted May 28, 2016 Share Posted May 28, 2016 jt has a good point about not finding the right meds. Yet. It takes trial and error, and sometimes the meds are found right away, but some do take a long time. If you find that one med causes you to have suicidal urges, then I'd let your pdoc know right away (and I am guessing he'd have you stop taking that med) and then you both can work together on finding another med that could be helpful. It usually does take time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OliverB Posted June 4, 2016 Author Share Posted June 4, 2016 Thank you for answering. The problem is I don't have time to try more meds until I find one that works... while I am in crazy world I still can do well enough to don't fail examns, but if I am sedated by meds I cannot. I could try to take an AP on summer, after I finish them. Meanwhile.... I have found melatonin hhhelps me a lot. Now I can sleep really well. It makes a huge change! I feel much better, my mind is clear. The entities are not pushing thoughts inside my head anymore, they are mute in a corner. I have made exercise and I have played a new videogame (I normally spend all the day in bed -sometimes I stare at the floor, sometimes I read books-, so It's a great new). Some things are talking, but they just describe whats happend and give me information or narrate what I read while studying. They don't bother me too much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissaw72 Posted June 5, 2016 Share Posted June 5, 2016 Not all meds make you sedated. And if they do, there is a good chance that side-effect of sedation will go away in time. (It happened like that for me with many meds). Many times). I waited out the med and in the end I was not sedated when taking it. I think it would be a good idea to try different meds out over the summer. By the end of it things might be a lot different (in a positive way) if you find a med/s that work for you. I'm glad the melatonin works for you and you are able to sleep well now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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