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anyone here with bipolar find they cut more when they're manic?


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not really an urgent question, i'm just wondering 

i find that when i self harm it happens a hell of a lot more when i'm in a mixed or manic state. this is super weird, but alongside the obvious notion of feeling totally invincible and being impulsive as shit, i think it comes from a weird urge to see blood? 

anyone else get this, even if it's not in the same grisly way i do? 

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Pardon my for answering, welcome to the board morguedweller, but I was manic the few instances I self-harmed when I was in middle school. I've had bipolar II since I was a child. Unless you count picking and destroying my cuticles and the side skin there that always, always needs a bit to to get rid of it. I'm sorry you're having that kind of urge. Does anything help you to overcome that and not do it? Music was my main saving grace as a teen. I often wonder, would I be here if there had been no Def Leppard and Leon Russel, or Cat Stevens, etc. You have to be careful with music though, IMO it can amp up depression or sadness and even anger, just as it can enhance love and joy. :(

 

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oh yeah, things like drawing and music can certainly help lessen the urges, when they come around. or sometimes my thought patterns are just going too fast that i forget i even had them in the first place. really depends on the situation, or whether or not i have an implement at hand.

haven't hurt myself in a while, though. i've been fairly stable as of late. 

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I am glad to hear that! Stability is wonderful, I had a good period of stability in my mid to late 30's, and for a few years doing my nails, like nail art (we have a thread here in the whatever forum about it) and that helped me to focus on allowing something productive to take the place and replace the self-destructive pattern I was feeling urged into expressing. Now I like to sew. :D I think hobbies are very important parts of therapy. Have you seen those cool adult coloring books? Wanting to get one. :D

 

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