Jump to content
CrazyBoards.org
Sign in to follow this  
jensenablez

i don't want to help my parents...

Recommended Posts

If this is your attitude towards your family you need to know it can work both ways, once you're past a certain age they don't need to help you either. 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Southern Discomfort said:

If this is your attitude towards your family you need to know it can work both ways, once you're past a certain age they don't need to help you either. 

why not? who says we need to be good anybody?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Because no one is an island. We all need to depend on each other from time to time. If you're not willing to put in the effort to help those around you well you're going to find yourself alone when you need someone. You'd be shooting yourself in the foot.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 minutes ago, jensenablez said:

why not? who says we need to be good anybody?

It's pretty much standard knowledge.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 minutes ago, Southern Discomfort said:

Because no one is an island. We all need to depend on each other from time to time. If you're not willing to put in the effort to help those around you well you're going to find yourself alone when you need someone. You'd be shooting yourself in the foot.

I disagree...nobody has to help anybody else, we're not owed anything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well I'm not going to argue about it. That's just how in my short time on this planet I've learnt about how we act in a society. If you don't want to be there from your parents when they need you, well that's very sad. And hopefully they won't need you. But I think one day you'll see sense in it, and hopefully it's not too late to rekindle old friends and family for you.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, Southern Discomfort said:

Well I'm not going to argue about it. That's just how in my short time on this planet I've learnt about how we act in a society. If you don't want to be there from your parents when they need you, well that's very sad. And hopefully they won't need you. But I think one day you'll see sense in it, and hopefully it's not too late to rekindle old friends and family for you.

i disagre...since this is how many behave, and it's deemed normal. but i like how you condemn me for this, and try and single me out, when i've responded how normal people respond in these cases. but be offended, i don't care.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I mean no offence. Anything I've said is purely unintentional and I don't mean to single you out. I just don't see this working out well for you, buddy.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lets see,your family 1) brought you into this world 2) fed and clothed you 3) provided a place for you to live 5) provided for your education. Hmmmm

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a son with this attitude . Suddenly he find himself with no support no backup plan and nothing left in the will for him. He lost a job and needed a place to go he couldn't pay his student loans and he almost got a divorce and then he tried for me to play " mom" 

suddenly he realized the consequences of his actions

not punishments ........ Natural consequences

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The only exception to not helping your parents is if they are abusive. Otherwise, they brought you into this world and they aren't there to be ignored, and you can't expect shit from them if you aren't a somewhat decent child towards them, and irresponsible and selfish because you want to live your own life. 

Because that is what you will get. A very lonely, probably fucked up life. 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just echoing every thing said in the above posts.

15 hours ago, pseudopod said:

You have already gotten a standard knowledge response. Most people would catch a clue.

Yes.  Definitely.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am going to go against the grain a bit here, but I don't feel obligated. I didn't have children to help me. My sister supports my mother financially, my brother is there physically. She doesn't like me or approve of me. Everything I borrowed from my parents came with a catch and I feel I have paid my dues. I visited my father when he was dying but I didn't feel I owed him anything.

It isn't greed. If I could help my sister somehow I would in a heartbeat.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You don't have to help anyone.  However, I think you'll be missing out.

Here's another perspective: Helping people feels good.  It can provide purpose and meaning and create opportunities for reciprocity.  In a way, it can be just as much a positive for you as it is for the recipient.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's no way to be, unless there really is no other option (e.g. they are extremely belligerent to you and you have been unable to reconcile the problem).

Edited by Steve223

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd like to think that folks come here in the interest of  (self) knowledge and recovery.  But troll poop is one of the prices we pay as an online community.  I'm starting to think I can finance my coming retirement with a website catering to polemic-minded trolls.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On ‎8‎/‎22‎/‎2016 at 8:20 PM, vanderk said:

I'd like to think that folks come here in the interest of  (self) knowledge and recovery.  But troll poop is one of the prices we pay as an online community.  I'm starting to think I can finance my coming retirement with a website catering to polemic-minded trolls.

It might not be a troll.  There are people that really feel this way towards their families.  Some may have (or think they have) a reason for it, but unfortunately there are plenty of people that feel this way that don't.  There unfortunately isn't enough information to say why OP feels the way they do, but I suspect it's probably nothing justified as there's so little info given.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...